


Made for T.V.

by LaOruga



Series: As seen on TV [1]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Accidental Voyeurism, Alternate Universe - No Sburb/Sgrub Sessions, Anxiety Attacks, Dave Strider cries, Dick Pics, Drinking, F/F, F/M, Gay Panic, Humanstuck, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Masturbation, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Recreational Drug Use, Sharing a Bed, because I'm a sucker for a crying dave, tv news au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-17
Updated: 2020-09-21
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:20:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 43,828
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25956628
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LaOruga/pseuds/LaOruga
Summary: When Dave Strider goes viral on the internet, Producer Karkat is forced to let the intern join the reporting team. Over the course of a year both Dave and Karkat experience the entanglements of local television while coming to terms with their personal feelings about the other.Tags and rating may change as updates are released.
Relationships: Dave Strider/Jade Harley, Dave Strider/Karkat Vantas, Eridan Ampora & Karkat Vantas, John Egbert/Terezi Pyrope/Vriska Serket, Nepeta Leijon & Karkat Vantas, Rose Lalonde/Kanaya Maryam, Sollux Captor/Aradia Megido
Series: As seen on TV [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1909465
Comments: 21
Kudos: 100





	1. The beginning

Karkat is sitting at the end of the long conference table with his head buried in his hands. The rest of the staff is quietly staring between the phone at the center of said table and the producer who looked like he just got the call that his pet died.

“Understood?” The executive asks.

Karkat remains silent for two more beats before quietly replying, “Understood.” 

The phone clicks and Johns leans over to hang up the call. 

Jade breaks the silence in the room with genuine cheer, “Congratulations to Dave! Welcome to the reporting team!” 

People around the start to clap and congratulate Dave who is sitting two seats down from where Karkat who glowers at his team. 

Karkat Vantas has been working for the local news station for three years. He went to school, majored in journalism and communications, worked a million shitty jobs in order to become a producer at a tiny news station in the middle of nowhere. But Dave Strider, interned by nepotism since he was brought on at the suggestion of his sister and who had only been making copies for less than a month, goes viral on youtube and quickly offered a segment by their executives.

Dave smirks when he notices Karkat scowling at him, “I promise to do my best, boss” he salutes. 

“You better be fucking ready to work your ass off, Strider.” Karkat points at Dave as he stands from his seat. Shitty decisions of not, Karkat still has a show to produce and assignments to hand out. 

Karkat goes down the list, “John, you do your weather thing. Don’t wear green! No more disembodied heads.” John grins and Karkat already half expects him to still show up in a green body suit. 

“Jade, your script is ready-- here’s a copy for you to look over.” Jade thanks him with a smile and pushes her glasses up as she immediately begins to flip through the pages.

“Rose,” Karkat calls but she doesn’t look up, “Rose, your segment for today is ready to go but tomorrow there’s a new bookstore opening downtown that we need you to do a report on.” Rose continues to tap away on her phone but extends her hand for the file, “Rose, I fucking swear. Stop flirting and pay attention.”

Rose finally looks up and raises her eyebrows with a slow grin. No one else is really paying attention, still focused mostly on Dave and some side conversations, so they miss the flash of panic that crosses Karkat’s face when he realizes he’s exposed himself to Rose. 

She pulls up her phone and takes a picture of him,“Did we get in the way of your morning routine, Karkat?” Her voice drips with acknowledgement. 

He tries to reach for the phone but Rose gracefully turns away and presses send on the picture.

“I’m going to kill you, Lalonde,”

Rose smiles. She knows that Karkat is mostly all bark and no bite. She has known him since they both were hired on to the show, climbing the journalistic ladder together. 

Dave, who has been half listening to the exchange between Rose and Karkat turns to give them his full attention “Flirting with who?”

“None of your business, Strider!”

“Kanaya, dear brother.”

Dave raises an eyebrow at Rose and Karkat can’t help but notice the resemblance. He has only personally known Dave for the two months that he has been their assistant slash intern, but he has seen the picture that is on Rose’s desk for years. They’re both incredibly attractive, with their tanned skin and blond hair. Karkat finds it insufferable. 

Dave shifts in his seat, “Oh.” 

Rose watches him carefully and Karkat gets the sense that there are questions and meanings behind the exchange and that makes him uncomfortable so he changes the subject. 

“Strider, this is your first assignment. There’s a student film festival happening at the college this week so you’re going to do a report on the finalists and interview some of the creators. Got it?”

Dave’s shoulders relax, “Yeah, got it chief.”

Karkat holds out the folder and when Dave grabs it he doesn’t let go, “And you’re not wearing those stupid glasses on camera.”

Dave tugs at the folder, “No can do, Boss.”

“I’ll fire you for insubordination.”

“It’s part of the brand. And the execs want me for my brand.”

Karkat clenches his jaw. He waits for the moment when Dave pulls on the folder again to let go of it. Dave doesn’t topple over the way he imagined it but he falters enough to satisfy Karkat. 

“Okay,” Karkat begins to gather his things as he addresses the room, “Meeting over, but don’t forget to show up to make-up and wardrobe on time. If you’re late, you’re on your own. I’m not going to rescue you from Kanaya.”

There’s a smattering of thank yous as they all begin to make their way out of the small conference room and to their desks. 

Karkat, being the producer, gets an office for himself. It’s small but at the very least it has a door so he can have some privacy, though he likes to keep it open so he can just yell at whoever has fucked up their part of the job. 

_ Aradia Explores!,  _ a children’s show, and  _ Fair Play,  _ a game show, are also local network shows that are housed in the same building. All three shows film in a warehouse studio behind the small building. 

Karkat looks out the fourth floor window of his office and feels sad at how the view of a run down parking lot is supposed to be the sight of luxury in this town.

There’s a quick knock on his door frame. Karkat looks back and sees Jade making her way in, closing the door behind her. 

It wasn’t too long ago that having Jade Harley step into his office would have made Karkat try to jump out the window--he’s proud of how much he’s moved past that point. He only wants to jump out the window a normal amount.

“Everything okay, Jade?”

She sits down across from Karkat and reaches for his hands on the desk, “Don’t be too hard on Dave. He’s just starting out.” she squeezes his hands. 

Karkat rolls his eyes, “I’m not going to play favorites.”

She sighs, “I’m not asking you to do that. Just be nice?”

“I’m not nice.”

Jade squeezes his hands a little harder, “I know you are actually the nicest. So be nice.”

She doesn’t wait for him to respond before she’s on her way out. 

  
  


Karkat groans again, but looks out the door to where Dave is sitting at his desk across from John. They’re chatting about something that makes John laugh. 

Karkat knows he’s going to be a hit. He’s seen the viral video a million times too many and he knows that at least half of the appeal is his looks. At least Karkat thinks so. 

And in the time he was an intern he did his job well and thoroughly so Karkat is confident that Dave will be a strong addition to their small team. 

There’s just something about looking at Dave, his mannerisms and the way that he carries himself that makes Karkat feel like there’s an itch he can’t scratch. 

Rubbing his hands over his face, Karkat shifts his focus back to the work. He can think about what Dave makes him feel some other time.


	2. One month

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Points are made and Karkat goes on a date that's not really a date.

Dave is sitting across from Karkat in the little closet that is the producer’s office. The door is unusually closed which gives Dave some indication of why he was called in.

Karkat slams Dave’s report on his desk. 

“Dude, when was the last time you got some sleep?” Dave leans back in the chair. His legs sprawled wide open and Karkat feels his face twitch at the sight.

“That is not what we are talking about! What the fuck is this? It’s just you fucking rambling for ten minutes about the impacts of streaming on the music industry!” Karkat rubs his temples. 

“Karkat, Bro, the circles around your eyes are concerning.”

“Pay attention asshole! We go on air in one hour and your report is a dumpster fire.”

Dave sits up and then leans forward with his elbows on the table, “It’s going to be fine,” he sighs, “Have I let you down yet?”

Karkat groans, “Yes!”

“On-air?”

Karkat opens his eyes and stares at Dave, “No. But you could!”

“I won’t. Scout’s promise.”

Karkat rolls his eyes and sinks into his chair. It has almost become routine to call Dave strider into his office at least once before each show. He never listens to Karkat’s notes and always makes him panic with incomplete and bogus reports but he’s right; Dave has never let him down on air. Karkat won’t admit it aloud, but the show’s ratings have gone up ever since Dave started doing his pop-culture reports.

Dave doesn’t get up to leave and Karkat doesn’t ask him to--instead, he pulls up his email on his desktop.

“So,” Dave starts, “Have you noticed anything up with Rose and Kanaya?”

Karkat snorts and looks at Dave over his computer screen, “You mean the fact that they’re always up in each other's business?”

Dave swallows, it’s the only indication Karkat can get of Dave’s nervousness, “Yeah, but like, now they’re doing more than just flirting?”

“Oh, did you walk in on them too?” 

Dave stiffens up in his seat, “What! No, I meant that they were standing closer together and taking their lunches and carpooling. You walked in on them? Are they-- are they together  _ together _ ?”

Karkat cocks his head to the side and wonders if maybe he just revealed something that he shouldn’t have. He’s been aware of Rose’s comings and goings from Kanaya’s bedroom for a while, never really thinking that they were hiding or being discreet. Karkat assumed Dave would be aware considering that Rose is his sister. 

“Strider, why do you say this like you’re shocked?”

Dave looks up at the ceiling. His bare neck fully exposed-- Karkat pretends his mind doesn’t immediately go to the gutter.

“I guess, I don’t know. I didn’t think Rose was, y’ know--” he mumbles.

The wheels in Karkat’s brain begin to turn, “A lesbian? Oh shit, is Rose not out to you? Oh shit,” Karkat begins to panic. Apart from outing someone being a shitty thing to do, Karkat is afraid of what Rose and Kanaya might do when they find out he accidentally outed them.

“Nah, I mean, she’s never said, ‘brother, it is I, your lesbian sister’ but maybe she’s tried?”

Karkat scoots his chair over so he can look at Dave, “I thought it was super obvious? Rose practically lives at my place.”

“I thought they were just hanging out. You know, gal-pals.”

Karkat can’t hold back a loud laugh, “Are you stupid, homophobic, or both?”

Dave’s lips twitch and his brows furrow, “Not homophobic.”

“So just stupid.” It’s frustrating to Karkat that he can’t read Dave as easily as he can read other people. Dave is like an emotional fortress, insufferable and cool seem to be the only two modes he’s allowed Karkat to see. This is a new Dave-- confused and flustered. Karkat’s imaginary itch begins to act up, he wants to push more buttons and try to unlock more reactions out of Dave. 

“I just didn’t think Rose was gay.” Dave finally admits. His eyes are closed behind his shades but Karkat can’t see that. Dave wills his father’s voice out of his head, anger and disappointment well up in his chest at the fact that he’s anything other than simply overjoyed for his sister.

Karkat watches Dave and thinks about the look on Rose’s face a month ago at the staff meeting when she admitted to flirting with Kanaya. The way that her face body responded to Dave’s quiet “oh”.

“Hey,” Karkat slams his hands on the desk, “Rose seems to be really happy with Kanaya. They’re obnoxiously sweet together. I know she’s your sister, but she’s my friend and if you’ve got some shit about them being together then you and I are going to have words.”

Dave can’t help chuckle at Karkat’s protective intentions for his sister. He thinks about being defensive, about telling Karkat he’s not homophobic and that he’s an asshole for thinking Dave might be one. But he can’t deny that he does have hangups, he has baggage that has been with him since he was a child-- the shadow of indoctrination that his father left him. 

“It’s cute that you’re so protective of them,” Dave looks back at Karkat, “But it just caught me by surprise. I’m glad Rose is happy.”

“Sometimes too happy,” Karkat mumbles under his breath, scooting back to the computer.

“Gross, dude, I don’t wanna know about my sister’s sex life.”

Karkat takes a pencil and throws it at Dave, “Get out. I have to get ready for the show.”

Dave takes the cue and grabs his papers, at the very least he will pretend to read the notes, “Sure thing, boss.”

“And don’t tell Rose that I told you about her and Kanaya! She knows where I sleep.”

Dave gives him a thumbs up on his way out. He bumps into Nepeta who gives him a friendly wave. Dave takes note that he’s seen her on their floor more often in the last couple of weeks. 

\--

Karkat hits send on the email he’s been working on when he hears someone knock on his door frame.

“Hey, Karkat.” Nepeta greets from the door. She’s playing with a strand of her hair, the warmest smile on her face. She always greets Karkat with genuine care.

Karkat nods, “Hey Nep, I gotta finish sending these emails, but what’s up?” 

He has considered Nepeta a close friend for years. She has been writing for Aradia’s show for longer than Karkat has been working at this station and she immediately took to showing Karkat around the place, making sure he felt welcomed. 

In the last couple of months, however, Karkat has felt the shift in their relationship. She’s become increasingly flirtatious and has made multiple attempts to get them to go out to dinner together. Nothing he would think too much of before, but there’s something in her eyes that tells him that saying yes would be setting himself up for something more than just a friendly meal.

“I was thinking we could get an early dinner tomorrow?” Nepeta locks on his eyes, determination clearly mixed into her playful expression, “There’s a new Thai place that just opened up!”

Karkat knows the place she’s talking about. It's a trendy and private restaurant that he has been meaning to check out with Kanaya. 

She looks so hopeful and Karkat thinks about what Kanaya said to him the last time they hashed out the state of his love life. And maybe Kanaya was right, just because his previous relationships didn’t end well or last long, that doesn’t mean he can’t give dating other people a shot. Nepeta is fierce and cute--she can take his shit as better than most folks and they share similar interests. 

“It’s just dinner, Karkat!” Nepeta teases, “Yeah?”

Karkat sighs, “Yeah okay but it has to be after the show.” 

Nepeta agrees and says goodbye. 

While he’s finishing his emails he thinks about how much he actually appreciates Nepeta’s friendship. And it’s mid taping when he realizes that stringing Nepeta along, giving her a false sense of hope for something more than friendship is not the kind of damage he wants to bring on their platonic relationship.

By the end of the show, Karkat has made up his mind. 

\--

Dave walks into the restaurant with John and Dave. It’s late at night and he’s glad that they’ve been able to find a place that’s open. 

The hostess leads them to a booth towards the back. 

Dave slides in next to Jade and she wastes no time leaning into him and placing a small kiss on his cheek. 

He smiles and lets her take his hand in hers. 

They’re looking over the menu when John gasps.

“Is that Karkat and Nepeta?” He whispers gleefully. 

Dave looks in the direction that John is nodding towards and can see that the hostess is leading them to a booth on the other side of the room. 

Nepeta is chatting happily and Karkat’s nervous gaze is laser-focused on the floor.

“They’re friends, right? They’re probably just out to get some food after work.” Dave lets himself be pulled in by Jade.

John giggles, “I’m going to go scare them!”

“Oh John, no,” Jade reaches for John before he can get out of the booth, “I think this is more than just a friendly dinner. I think Nepeta is going to make her move.”

Dave directs his attention back to where Nepeta and Dave are sitting. They haven’t noticed the trio on the other side of the room. 

“Oh, really? I didn’t realize that they had a thing going.” John brings up his beer to drink but before he takes a sip he says, “I guess Karkat has a type?”

This catches Dave’s attention again. He doesn’t know a whole lot about the personal lives of his co-workers, he realizes that he probably doesn’t even really know about the personal life of his sister and they live together-- but he has gotten to know Karkat a lot more in the last month or so, and he’s come across as an asexual crab.

“John!” Jade hisses.

“What! Nerdy girls with dark hair who are confident and know what they want?” John wiggles his eyebrows at Jade.

Dave stops to think, “Wait, did you date Karkat?”

Jade groans and hides her face in Dave’s shoulder. He feels her nod.

“They went out for like three months.” John fills in.

Something stirs in the pit of Dave’s stomach, he wonders if he’s feeling jealous about Karkat dating his current girlfriend. 

“We broke up because we couldn’t stop arguing over stupid shit. It was starting to get in the way of work.”

John smiles softly at Jade, “But now you’re with Dave!”

At the claim, Jade reaches up and kisses the corner of Dave’s mouth. 

“Well,” she sighs, “I wish Nepeta the best of luck. She’s going to need it. And Karkat would be lucky to be with her.” 

John hums in agreement, “yeah, his taste in women is a lot better than his taste in men.”

Dave spills some of his drink, “What?”

John hands him a napkin and shakes his head, “Oh, KK’s taste in men is the opposite of his taste in women. The last guy he dated, before Jade, that was a disaster.”

“That’s right! Ampora right? Oh my god, he was such a jerk and he was so clingy! Kind of a babe though.” Jade giggles at the memory.

Dave glances back to where Nepeta is still chatting and Karkat looks to have relaxed a little. He can’t imagine what it must be like to date Karkat. 

Karkat who is always yelling and angry about something, but is also protective of his friends. Karkat, who is terrifyingly efficient at rounding up a bunch of young and dorky reporters and making sure they have everything they need to make the best show possible. Karkat who is often the last one to leave the office always and sometimes when Dave shows up early to work he finds that Karkat never made it home-- but will scream bloody murder if he suspects anyone else is falling behind on taking care of themselves. Karkat who wears a suit that highlights how good his ass is, only when the execs are scheduled to come in and-- 

Dave shakes his head at the last part.

“Dave, are you okay?” his girlfriend asks. 

He nods, “yeah, I'm just hungry.”

\--

Nepeta can sense that Karkat is nervous about dinner. He hasn’t started an argument or really tried to take over the conversation. He lets her talk and she makes sure to hit all of his comfort points until she sees that he is beginning to relax.

Karkat can’t help notice that Nepeta has dressed up. He’s still wearing his work clothes, which are an ensemble of blacks and grays. But Nepeta is wearing some light make-up and a dress which he knows is unusual for her.

Karkat doesn’t eat much of his food, he’s trying to think about when to approach the subject and fight the urge to just ignore whatever is happening between them and make it a problem for future Karkat to deal with.

“You know, I really like this.” Nepeta’s voice quivers slightly.

Karkat’s whole body tenses and he sits stock still in his chair.

“Yeah, the food is good.” he offers when she doesn’t continue.

Nepeta lets out a quiet giggle, “No, silly, I mean I like you and me. Sitting here having dinner together.”

_ There it is,  _ Karkat thinks. There is no way to avoid it without leading nepeta to think that they could be anything more than friends. 

“I think we would do really well together,” she looks down at her hands.

Karkat swallows, “I think we are really good friends.”

He sees Nepeta wince at the implication, “Nep, I think we are really good friends. Your friendship means a lot to me.”

Her eyes flutter and Karkat is suddenly worried that she might cry. He’s never seen her cry. She often stims when she’s overwhelmed but he doesn’t know how to handle it if she starts crying. 

She takes the cloth napkin and starts playing with a corner, “But maybe we could be more?” 

Karkat shakes his head, “I’m really sorry. I don’t feel that way about you. I love you a lot but it’s more of a non-romantic, you’re one of my best friends, kind of love. I’d set myself on fire if I ever ruined our friendship by trying to make it something else.”

Nepeta smiles but doesn’t meet Karkat’s eyes. 

“I admire your courage.” He offers, “I’ve never had the guts to tell someone how I feel about them.”

“Thank you. I hope--I hope I didn’t mess up our friendship with this.”

“Of course not! We’re good! I don’t want to gossip about our crew members with anyone else.”

Nepeta laughs but then abruptly stops and turns to the side. 

“Speaking of crew members, aren’t those yours over there?” She waves.

Karkat turns to look and sees John waving back enthusiastically. He’s sitting at a booth with Jade and Dave. His eyes zoom in to where he sees that Jade has a hand resting on Dave’s leg. 

That was not a development he was expecting. He blinks at them for a moment. Any nervous tension in his body is quickly replaced by a familiar baseline of frustration. 

“Of. fucking. course. Goddamn it.”

\---

The night ends amicably and Karkat says good night to Nepeta after walking her to her car. He watches her leave before heading over to his own vehicle. 

He makes a dramatic one-eighty when he sees that he’s got a trio waiting for him.

“Karkat!” John yells, “Come back here!”

Karkat dragged his feet back towards his car. Dave has Jade’s arm wrapped around his waist and Karkat tells himself not to fixate on the point of contact, he also makes a note to have them sign a disclosure form the next day at work. 

“So how’d it go?” 

Karkat glares at the question but John's grin only grows. 

“That is none of your business.”

John pouts and puts an arm around Karkat’s shoulder, He can smell the alcohol on his breath.

“Aw, did you say yes? You two would be the cutest couple, tied with Dave and Jade, of course--”

Karkat pushes John away from him, making sure that he doesn’t fall backward. 

“We’re not dating. Nepeta is my friend.”

A quiet, “huh,” escapes Dave but no one other than Jade hears it. 

“Aw, okay. But KK, you deserve to be happy. Remember that. Love for a crabby producer is out there. I love you KK. Not like that. But I love you,” John slurs the last ‘you’ as he leans on the car behind him.

“He’s not driving right?” Karkat turns his attention to where Jade and Dave are standing.

“Nah, we all came in Jade’s car.” Dave carefully moves out of Jade’s hold and reaches for John who is starting to slump towards the ground. 

“Jade, can you drop me off at my place?” he asks, holding his friend up.

Jade smirks, “Or you can spend the night at my place?”

John pulls away and manages to teeter towards some bushes. There’s a collective grimace where they hear him retch. 

Karkat jumps back and Dave groans, “Dude, what the heck. You cannot handle your alcohol.”

Jade sighs, “Okay never mind. I’m gonna have to take care of this doofus.”

Karkat watches them put John in the back seat, Jade hands him a plastic bag she has in the seat pocket. 

“Uh, actually. Dave, I can drop you off if you want?”

“Karkat, that is so nice!” John giggles from the back seat.

“Oh, it’s no trouble, I’ve got it.” Jade closes the door on John and smiles wide at Karkat.

Karkat scratches the back of his head, careful to not reveal more than he should, “I uh, just need to pick something up from Rose so I was planning on stopping by anyways.”

Dave nods, understanding what Karkat is talking about. He remembers that Rose and Kanaya left the studio together so Karkat is probably just going to pick Kanaya up to take her home.

“Are you okay with taking care of John on your own?” 

Jade bites her lip and thinks about it, “Yeah, Dave, Don’t worry! I’ll call you if anything comes up.”

She smiles and kisses Dave on the lips. Karkat looks away quickly and moves to unlock the car. 

“Yeah, okay, send me a text when you get home,” Dave says, reaching for the passenger door of Karkat’s car. 

Jade nods and gets into her own car.

Karkat turns on the car but doesn’t leave until he sees Jade pull out of the parking lot. 

He doesn’t ask where to take Dave because he’s living with Rose and Karkat has been over for their book club every other Monday for a year. 

The radio is playing some soft R&B hits since it is past 9 pm. Neither of them speaks for the first five minutes of the drive but when the radio host starts reading some listener love letters, Karkat scrambles to turn off the radio.

“Uh, so how was dinner?” The road ahead of them is dark and empty. 

Dave shrugs, “Probably not as eventful as yours.”

“Well, maybe. Nepeta is cool, but I’m just not looking to get into a relationship right now.”

They fall back into a few beats of silence.

“Is it awkward for you that I’m dating Jade?”

“No, I-- Oh wait, I guess you know? No that’s long over. But you’re going to need to sign a disclosure for the company or we’re all going to get our asses beat by the execs.”

Dave nods quietly. He turns to look at Karkat, his face is completely shrouded in shadows. He looks young in the quiet of the car. His face is full of soft features and his tousled hair gives him an effortlessly wild look. 

“Who’s Ampora?”

The car skids for a moment when Karkat registers the question.

“Those blind assholes, I am going to kill them,” he grinds his teeth. 

Dave holds on to the ceiling of the car, “Okay, but not if you kill us first.”

“We’re fine!” Karkat barks back, “it’s just embarrassing shit, okay!”

Karkat can feel his face grow warm and is thankful that they’re essentially sitting in the dark so Dave can’t see his shame. 

“He’s an ex.” Karkat will leave at that, he won’t share that when he gets drunk or particularly lonely he tends to wake up in Eridan’s bed two hours away from his own house, full of regret. That’s information Dave doesn’t need to know.

They change the topic to work, which feels a lot safer for both of them. Before they know it they’ve arrived at Rose's house. Kanaya is already on her way out when they pull up, she looks a little surprised when Dave gets out of the car.

Kanaya nods at Dave as she passes him and gets into the passenger seat. She raises an elegant eyebrow at Karkat while she buckles up.

“So you left for dinner with Nepeta and came home with Dave?”

Karkat mumbles a  _ shut up _ under his breath and drives them home. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hooray! we made it to chapter 2. This one feels a little dry. I kind of wanted to establish some of the relationships and dynamics in this chapter. Thinking about it now I could have livened this one up with some of the content from chapter 3 but I'm trying not to mix up time skips.
> 
> Thank you for reading!
> 
> \--🐛


	3. two months

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The crew goes go to a nice company dinner and Karkat gets drunk when he runs into his ex.   
> Later, Karkat falls asleep while watching some valentine's day releases with Dave.

In the three months that pass, things in Karkat’s life remain calm. The most exciting thing for a while is that Rose and Kanaya announce that they’re formally dating but that’s not newsworthy beyond their friend group. 

Local news is fairly uneventful and they find themselves mostly reporting on the happenings on a wider state level. The mayor, who is a fan of all of their local shows, suggests that they do a little crossover.

Dave ends up joining Aradia on  _ Aradia Explores!  _ Where he raps to an animatronic beaver about the importance of water conservation. Dave smiles as he does it and even though Karkat has learned that there are smiles that Dave has practiced many times for public consumption, he still watches the clip over and over until he decides he’s being a creep.

In exchange, Terezi did a special report with Rose, and John was on an episode of  _ Fair Play,  _ where he got to be a guest judge and got a face full of pie a total of three times. Karkat didn’t watch those segments with the same veracity. 

So things feel tranquil and almost a little boring for three months. 

“Maybe you should try dating?” Kanaya says one morning over breakfast. It is a rare morning that Rose isn’t with them.

“And maybe you could be less obsessed with my love life,” Karkat sticks his tongue out at her.

Kanaya rolls her eyes, “I worry you might be lonely.”

Karkat stares at his coffee mug, it’s got a little bi heart that suddenly feels like mocking. “How can I be lonely if no one ever leaves me the fuck alone.” He tries to pull up his bravado but it falls flat the way it always does with Kanaya. 

She sips from her mug and hums, “Okay, but at least make some friends. I’d like to have the apartment to myself more often.”

Karkat gags on his coffee and Kanaya smirks at the sound.

\--

Karkat lets Kanaya adjust his tie before they walk into the building. She pats his face lightly before telling him to behave and then moves to adjust everyone else's clothes.

They’re standing outside one of the nicest hotels Karkat has ever seen. It’s got all of its old-world charms with the modern amenities that has Dave taking a million pictures. 

The whole studio has been flown out to the big city for a special dinner hosted by their executives and CEOs. 

Despite getting invited every year, this is the first time Karkat has attended since he started working at the small station. While it would be great for networking and moving up in the business, maybe even helping him branch out of local television, for Karkat it is a minefield of people to insult and get fired by. 

So when Kanaya says  _ behave _ she means,  _ don’t get fired. _

They file into the lobby where they are escorted by a man wearing a blazer that has the network logo embroidered in the breast pocket. A few people who recognize Dave from the internet and stop him to get a picture with him. Karkat flips him off when he pulls him into one of the pictures. 

When they get to the reception table the man hands them each a small stack of papers.

“It's an open bar, your tags are color-coded and will indicate which table you are seated at, right now it’s cocktail hour, here is a program that outlines, heh, the program.” 

They all nod at the list and look at each other’s name tags. They seem to be scattered all over the place.

“Hey, looks like we will be at the same table, KK.” Sollux pokes Karkat’s name tag.

“I wonder if they put people together based on roles?” Jade muses.

Karkat feels the color drain out of his face.

“What? No--why do that? No.” he shakes his head. 

Kanaya and Sollux each put a hand on Karkat’s shoulder, “I’m sure that’s not the case, and if it is, then at least you have Sollux there with you.” Kanaya tries to comfort him. 

Dave looks at John for an explanation but he just shrugs.

When they file in, Dave frowns as he watches Karkat make a beeline for the bar. 

“Yikes, that’s not a good sign,” Sollux says behind him.

“Karkat drinking?” Dave asks.

“And Eridan Ampora is sitting at our table.”

The entire news crew suddenly gathers to look at the table Sollux is indicating. A few people are sitting around it already, and Dave isn’t quite sure who Eridan Ampora is amongst the bunch. 

“Oh, there he is,” John whispers.

“Mmm, what should we do?” Rose asks.

They all turn to look at Kanaya, “Karkat is an adult, he can make his own decisions.”

“Is he though?” Sollux crosses his arms over his chest. 

Kanaya taps her chin with a finger, “Well, he’s at your table so you’re babysitting. If he gets too drunk make sure that he comes back to the hotel with you.”

Karkat makes his way to his table with a drink in his hand. They watch his face go through the stages of grief when he realizes that Eridan is already at his table. It eventually settles on his usual work designated scowl. 

“Okay, that’s my cue.” Sollux gives everyone a wave and heads over to the table to join Karkat.

\--

“It’s nice to see you again, Karkat, Sollux.”

Sollux doesn’t allow Karkat to respond, “Good to see you again, Ampora. How’s work in the city treating you?”

Eridan smiles in a polite, designed for TV kind of way. He’s always one of the best-dressed people in the room with a flamboyant hipster kind of style, which often leaves people wondering why he spends most of his time behind the camera and not in front of it.

Sollux has seated himself between Eridan and Karkat, for which Karkat is grateful. He tries to make small talk with the other people at the table, but they don’t wait long to go get another drink from the bar. 

Karkat downs a basic vodka cranberry and makes a move towards the bar again. Sollux catches him from the corner of his eye and pulls him back to his seat.

“What’s wrong, Vantas? Are you afraid you won’t wake up in your hotel room tonight?” 

Sollux sighs and regrets not getting a drink for himself, “Leave him alone, Ampora.”

“I’d need something a lot harder than a few cocktails--”

“Oh, I can definitely give you something harder.”

Karkat’s face turns bright red and Sollux sees all the signs of a classic Karkat Vantas shit show playing out.

“Stop it. Both of you.” Sollux hisses.

Karkat bites his tongue and sits back in his chair. He ignores Eridan’s smirk.

Sollux eventually suggests that Karkat and he go get a drink-- pretty soon Karkat finishes four vodka cranberries and manages to sneak in an extra shot of tequila for good measure. 

Dinner begins and Karkat feels like he’s sobering up by the end of the meal. Eridan leaves their table to network with some other folks making sure that Karkat catches a wink and a smile. Sollux holds Karkat’s hands down so that he doesn’t accidentally flip off a room full of people who sign their paychecks.

Karkat takes a sip of the water his friend has pushed in his direction, “You should go do some networking too, Sol.” 

“I don’t know, man, that seems like such a drag.”

Karkat rolls his eyes, “You’ve been trying to break  _ Aradia Explores!  _ into national television, this is the time to go kiss some ass and get your show some exposure.”

Sol pats Karkat and finishes his drink, “Yeah Okay. I’m going to go walk around. Don’t drink anymore alcohol. Don’t fight anyone. Got it?”

Karkat gives his friend a thumbs up and watches him move into the sea of people that have gathered near the bar. 

Suddenly feeling hot and like the room was too stuffy, Karakat gets out of his seat and looks for the exit. 

When he stands he realizes that he’s not sober because the room spins and he feels like he’s swaying. He takes a deep breath before walking away from the table. 

He knows that he’s not the only one who is pretty tipsy. Eridan was matching him drink for drink and the line at the bar had consistently stayed the same.

Karkat makes it out of the lobby and heads for the doors, the mere idea of fresh air suddenly sounds delicious to him. 

The cool air on his face feels good but it is disorienting. Karkat takes a step and immediately regrets it when he can’t feel his foot touch the ground. 

Karkat closes his eyes tightly and braces for impact but to his surprise, he finds himself upright with his back pressed against someone. 

The alcohol has slowed down his reactions so it takes him a moment to slowly open his eyes. 

Someone has their arms wrapped around him. When he manages to open his eyes he recognizes the sleeves of the red suit that Kanaya had picked out for Dave.

Karkat tilts his head back and sees the familiar shades. 

“Why are you wearing your shades if it’s night time, you fucking dweeb.”

The corners of Dave’s lips curl up slightly, “Part of my brand, remember?” 

The fact that Dave Strider is holding him and that he almost drunkenly fell on his face finally registers in Karkat’s brain. Karkat pushes and flails his arms to get away but his inebriated state has not changed and he ends up tripping over his feet again. 

Dave manages to catch him by his shirt for the second time.

“What the fuck are you doing out here? You should be networking right now. I ordered you all of those nice-ass business cards so you could share them with producers and execs.”

When Dave feels like Karkat has finally figured out how to stand in one spot he lets go of his shirt. 

Karkat’s cheeks are bright red from the alcohol and his eyes look glossy but still a little tired. He’s wearing clothes that fit him because Kanaya dressed him and he looks so good. Dave can quietly recognize that Karkat is attractive in his mind. Where no one else can hear it. 

“I had to make sure that you weren’t going to walk out into traffic and get yourself hit by a car or something.”

Karkat runs a hand through his hair and leans back on the stair railing, “I’m fine, I just wanted to get some air.”

Dave moves to stand next to him, mostly to make sure that he can catch Karkat if he falls again.

He hasn’t had much to drink but he’s made sure to keep a close eye on Karkat, especially after Kanaya shared with Dave that she was worried about the toxicity of the on-and-off aspects of his relationship with Eridan.

“He just comes back such a wreck, so full of self-loathing, it makes  _ me  _ want to scream.” Kanaya had whispered to Dave.

Karkat runs both of his hands through his hair, messing up whatever Kanaya had done to try and tame it,“You can go back in. I won’t die.”

Dave Shrugs and puts one hand in his pant pocket, “The air feels good. You had the right idea, boss.”

Karkat takes a deep breath, “Yeah, I’m full of some fucking amazing ideas.” a fleeting thought passes through his mind, something about kissing blond douchebags.

“How are things with Jade?”

Dave tenses at the question. 

“Things are fine.” Dave lies.

“Oh. That’s good.”

“Yeah.”

An awkward silence settles between them.

“We should go back, they’re probably going to do closing remarks soon.” Karkat stands up and uses Dave’s arm to steady himself.

“You okay?” Dave holds Karkat by the elbow.

“I’m fine. I just can’t drink anymore or I might end up waking up Ampora’s damn apartment.”

At the brazen reminder of Karkat’s bisexuality, Dave pulls away abruptly from Karkat. The smaller man stumbles at the sudden movement and falls on his butt.

“Ow! What the fuck, Strider!”

“Oh shit, I’m sorry. Here let me--” Dave offers his hand and Karkat takes it. 

“I fucking swear, If Kanaya tries to kill me for getting this suit dirty I am sending her your way.”

\--

Karkat wakes up in his own bed by himself which he considers a success. Kanaya and Sollux tell him they’re proud of him, “we know how weak-willed you are KK,” Sollux teases.

And Karkat doesn’t tell them that he spent most of the night sending and receiving nudes from Eridan. He’ll let them be proud. 

The flight back for Karkat and his crew is earlier than the rest. They are sitting at the flight gate in varying states of being hungover. They all look like a mashed-up entourage wearing sunglasses indoors just like Dave, who, along with Kanaya, seems to be fine.

“I emailed everyone their assignments,” Karkat groans at the sound of his own voice.

The crew echoes his sentiment.

“Dude, no. Let me have my Sunday,” John buries his face into Jade’s hair.

Karkat doesn’t have the energy to fight so he lets it go. 

Dave is the only one that pulls up the email on his phone. There is no subject line or body text, there’s only a pdf file attached. Dave clicks on it and waits for it to load.

“Wait, Karkat, what the fuck?” 

Dave’s annoyed tone jerks Karkat awake from where he was finally falling asleep.

“Wha-?” He rubs his eyes under his dark glasses.

Dave looks pissed and it’s an expression that Karkat mentally adds to his collection of Dave’s faces. 

The blond is holding his phone up but the screen is hidden. He points to it clearly annoyed at whatever he has been talking about. 

Karkat’s groggy brain tries to piece together what Dave is talking about. Karkat said emails, emails he sent out late last night--or technically early that morning. The emails were drafted on his phone which was annoying because as king of multitasking he was also in the middle of sending Eridan pictures of--

“Wait!” he shouts and several annoyed passengers look over in their direction. 

The color drains out of Karkat’s face and panic buzzes all over his skin. Karkat reaches over Rose and Kanaya for Dave’s phone, but Dave pulls it back and stops Karkat with a hand on his forehead.

“Don’t open it! Don’t look at it!” Karkat hisses. 

Kanaya pulls Karkat back into his seat by his collar, “Don’t look at what?” 

Dave’s annoyed expression turns to confusion. He stares at Karkat again before looking back to his phone.

“No!” Karkat’s voice cracks.

He scrambles to take out his tablet and pulls up his work email. He quickly scans through the attachments and confirms that they’re all PDFs and none of them are image files.

Relief washes over him and he slides out of his chair dramatically, “Oh, thank god!” He cries. 

Dave is back to being annoyed, “My assignment is going to take like ten hours to complete, asshole.”

Karkat is still soaking in the relief of not having sent Dave Strider a dick pic via his work email, that he just dismisses Dave’s comment with a small wave.

Rose leans down and turns to look at Karkat. She‘s grinning so wide it scares him 

“Worried you sent him the wrong thing?” She takes off her sunglasses. Her violet eyes look at him full of  _ knowing _ . Sometimes Karkat wonders if Rose is a witch. 

Karkat is breathing heavily, “Fuck off, Lalonde.”

This only makes her laugh. 

Kanaya who has been sleepily watching the exchange brings a hand up to her temples, “Karkat, you didn’t.” her voice drips in disappointment.

“I didn’t!” he hisses back. 

Dave, frustrated at being ignored inserts himself back into the conversation, “Didn’t what? Hello, he is making me watch all of the theater’s Valentine’s day releases.”

Feeling calmer, Karkat pushes himself back up into his seat. Across from them John and Jade are fast asleep, unaware of their surroundings. 

“Get over it, you’ve got the best assignment out of everyone. Don’t be such a prick.”

“There are like five movies and they all sound like trash.”

Karkat glowers at Dave, “You sound like trash! You’re just pissed that you’re going to have to actually work because I’m making you do a ranking and not letting you ramble about useless shit no one cares about.”

Dave takes a deep breath and pushes his glasses back up the bridge of his nose.

“You pretty much attached a guide on how to watch the movies.” His voice is collected but Karkat can still detect the frustration.

“I’m just trying to make sure you don’t fuck this up.” Karkat crosses his arms over his chest and faces forward so he doesn’t have to look at Dave’s face anymore.

“Karkat’s kind of obsessed with Rom-coms. He’s traditionally done this ranking each year.” Rose no longer sounds amused and has gone back to resting on Kanaya’s shoulder. 

Dave runs a hand through his hair, “Well fuck, I’m not stopping you.”

“It’s your job, jerkwad,”

“If you think I’m going to follow your drunk incoherencies, you better think twice.”

Karkat whips back to look at Dave, “I’m fucking feeding you the segment on a silver platter, you’re such an ungrateful shit.”

Kanaya pats his knee and tells him to quiet down, “Why don’t you just watch them together? They’re sending it all as a video file, right? That way Karkat can still watch the movies as is his tradition and guide you with your report.” She smiles at Dave and he can see that spending time with Rose is making her adopt some of her mannerisms. 

Dave’s face settles back into his stoic default as he waits for Karkat’s response. The producer is looking away like a petulant child and Dave wonders for a wuick second about what Karkat must have been like as a kid.

“Yeah, that’s fine. If I’m going to have to sit through eight-plus hours of shitty writing, the boss should have to suffer through it too.”

Karkat looks like he’s about to reply but Dave catches the way Kanaya pinches his side. He lets out a little yelp and settles back into his seat.

\--

Karkat is exhausted. He thought he might be able to get some sleep on the airplane but the turbulence kept him and every baby on board awake. So he worked on replying to emails, looking over scripts, organizing calendars, and ignoring messages from Eridan.

When the airplane lands they all cram themselves into a rental van. Even though Kanaya is the one driving, her fast and reckless driving keeps him awake with his anxiety at its highest.

John and Jade are the first to be dropped off. Dave gets out to help Jade with her bags.

“Are you sure you don’t want to stay?” Karkat overhears Jade ask.

He sees Dave adjust his glasses in the rearview mirror, “I’ve gotta get working on this assignment. It’s going to be brutal to get through them all.”

Karkat glares at Dave through the mirror until Rose catches him doing it. 

Jade smiles at Dave and strokes his cheek, “You can watch them here? I’ll make us dinner?”

Karkat watches Kanaya and Rose exchange a meaningful look and then look back at Karkat. 

“What?” he frowns. 

“I kind of already agreed to watch them with Karkat. He has these notes that look like gibberish and I’m really too tired for any of this shit, I’m going to need someone to kick my ass so I stay awake--” Dave rambles for a moment. 

Karkat twists around to look at them, “Fine, asshole! I’ll just do the fucking assignment myself. Expect a report in the morning!”

Jade blinks back at Karkat like she’s surprised that he’s been listening to their conversation. As if they weren’t talking right into his ear.

Dave shakes his head, “No boss, a job is a job.”

Jade drops her shoulders with a deep sigh. She kisses Dave on the cheek before saying goodbye to everyone and following John into the house.

Dave steps back into the van and sits on the opposite end of where Karkat is sitting.

“So, when and where?” he asks Karkat. 

“Why not at our place?” Rose interjects, “I was thinking about spending the afternoon at Kanaya’s.”

“Wow Rose, thank you for inviting yourself into my home,” Karkat narrows his eyes at Rose.

“Thank you Karkat, you are free to invite yourself into mine whenever you feel like it,” 

Dave breaks up the exchange, “My place sounds good. You okay with just being dropped off?”

Karkat nods. 

\--

Dave orders food and it arrives shortly after they’ve settled into the living room. Karkat is busy connecting his computer to the television when Dave comes in with containers and drinks. 

“So there are five movies. Most of them are blockbusters but there’s one indie film in here that I actually bet you’re going to love.” Karkat is smiling to himself as he speaks. He’s wearing an oversized hoodie that has their logo printed on the back. It swallows him up making him look small and cute, a complete difference from the way he looked the night before.

“What makes you think I’ll like the indie one?” Dave settles on one end of the couch. 

Karkat finishes queuing the movie and then moves to sit on the other end of the couch. There’s enough space that one of them could stretch their legs out if they wanted but Karkat chooses to tuck his legs into the sweater.

“It just seems on brand.” Karkat teases.

The first movie begins and it is as shitty as Dave expects it to be. The plot is dry and the acting is over the top. It’s a drama and he’s pretty sure that the male protagonist is going to die by the end of the movie. Dave is typing up some notes on his phone when he hears some sniffling. 

He looks up and sees that tears are welling up in Karkat’s eyes. 

“Yo. Karkat, are you okay?” Dave carefully asks.

“Yes! Fuck off!” Karkat’s voice quivers. 

Dave looks back at the television and tries to ignore the discomfort that envelopes him. He’s hyper aware of Karkat’s emotional whimpers as the story develops exactly as Dave predicted. 

Karkat himself is completely engrossed in the movie, while his preference sits with comedies rather than dramas, any film dealing with matters of the heart will always get to him. And maybe it’s the exhaustion coupled with the fact that his own love life is a colossal disaster and he spent the night before sending drunken texts to a fuck boy he doesn’t really like, but this objectively bad movie --he can admit to that-- is really getting to him. 

He’s thankful that Dave doesn’t really make a big deal about it. When the movie ends, Dave gets up to turn on the lights and stretch. Karkat wipes the tears off his face with his sleeves and regrets not leaving his vision blurry when Dave stretches and the hem of his t-shirt rides up, revealing the divots in his hips.

Karkat grabs a container of cold food and shoves some noodles into his mouth and looks away before Dave can catch him staring. 

The sun is beginning to set by the time they finish the second movie. It is a romantic comedy that makes Karkat laugh with genuine amusement and Dave finds himself watching for Karkat’s reactions more than the actual movie. 

Somewhere between movie three and movie, four sleep gets the better of Karkat. He extends himself on the couch without meaning to and his legs end up draped over Dave’s lap. By the time they’re halfway through the indie movie he’s in deep sleep, his legs kicking abruptly every now and then. 

Dave strokes Karkat’s calves, soothingly, when he starts thrashing at one point. 

The indie movie isn’t...great, Dave decides. He scrolls through his notes when credits begin to roll and realizes that most of his notes are based on Karkat’s reactions. 

“Maybe I should rewatch this indie movie and actually pay attention,” Dave mumbles to himself. 

He looks at the clock on his phone and then at sleeping Karkat. His boss’s face looks uncharacteristically at peace while he sleeps. He knows Karkat hardly ever gets any sleep and Dave feels guilty at the idea of waking him up from slumber if he is finally getting some. 

Dave contemplates taking a nap himself right where he is on the couch and is beginning to drift off in the dark living room when a bright light suddenly lights up the room.

It’s Karkat’s cellphone, wedged under one of his thighs. Multiple message notifications pop up one after another from a contact that simply has the purple Aquarius emoji as a name. Dave isn’t trying to pry or invade Karkat’s privacy, but he is trying to take a nap and whoever is sending the messages is sending a lot of them. 

Dave is reaching for the phone to turn it around and block the light but his hand freezes when he sees the latest notification. There’s a small image preview on a corner. It’s small but Dave can make out what it is.

It’s someone’s dick. 

Two more follow before a text message pops up.

_ Come on Vantas, I know you’re down to play.  _

Dave’s mouth goes dry. This is definitely an invasion of Karkat’s privacy but what kind of idiot leaves his message previews on and then falls asleep at someone else’s house?

His head is spinning and he has to take off his glasses to rub his eyes trying to erase the image of someone’s dick on Karkat’s phone. His mental perception of Karkat as an asexual crab quickly unravels and when he looks at Karkat’s sleeping figure he can’t help but think,

_ Karkat fucks. _

The messages keep coming, mostly strings of emojis indicating annoyance at being ignored. Dave ignores them in favor of staring at Karkat. 

Dave licks his lips without thinking. 

Karkat begins to stir again and Dave freezes. The oversized sweater gets twisted and exposes Karkat’s back, leaving Karkat’s ass in the jeans he’s wearing in full display. 

Dave feels himself grow warmer, something he chalks up to awkwardly seeing a dick pick on your friend slash boss’s phone.

His own phone starts to flash and Dave sees that he has an incoming call from Kanaya. 

“What’s up?” he tries to level his tone. 

“Oh good, I was calling Karkat and he didn’t pick up. Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, everything’s good. He’s just asleep.”

Kanaya chuckles, “Take a picture for me before you wake him up, okay. So I can show him that he does have the ability to sleep.”

Dave nods even though Kanaya can’t see him through the phone. 

“I’m going to drop Rose off in about ten minutes, please tell him to get ready,”

After Dave hangs up he quickly takes a picture of Karkat and sends it to Kanaya. His finger lingers over the delete button afterward before moving on and shaking Karkat awake. 

“Huh? Wha--?” it takes a second for Karkat to gather his bearings and then quickly scrambles away from Dave.

“Your mom called and says she’s going to pick you up soon.”

Karkat scrunches up his face, “My mom? What!”

Dave pushes Karkat’s legs off of himself, “Kanaya.”

Karkat groans and reaches for his phone. He quickly scrolls through his notifications and when he stiffens up with his ears and cheeks turning bright red, Dave looks away. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to post this. I kept going back and making changes and obsessing over some stuff. SO... ahead of schedule here is chapter 3 before I lose my nerve.
> 
> Thank you for reading!


	4. One week

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Breakups, exhaustion, witnessing your boss masturbate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please take note that the tags and ratings have been updated.

Dave is sitting at his desk typing away his report for Karkat. It’s been two months since they watched romance movies together and after deciding that he didn’t want to be called in for a notes meeting, Dave figured out how to write a decent report. 

He sees Jade approaching out of the corner of his eye but keeps typing. 

“Hey, Dave,” she sits on the edge of his desk. She’s wearing a casual spring dress and a large sun hat that he’s seen in Kanaya’s closet of work wardrobes. It’s cute and makes Jade look like she stepped out of a modeling catalog. 

He hits print on the computer and then looks up at Jade, smiling.

She returns the smile. In the last couple of months, she has started smiling at him the way she smiles on television, big and bright but a hit of fakeness can be detected by the trained eye. 

“Dinner at my place after work?”

Dave leans back in his chair and thinks, “That would be a really late dinner and we have an early morning.”

Jade bites the inside of her cheek.

“And tomorrow I’m going to that show with Karkat and Kanaya so we can get some stills and b-roll for the segment on the mayor. The day after--”

Jade places a finger on Dave’s lips, “Okay, I get it. You’re busy! We just haven’t done anything,” she sighs, “in a while.”

John who is sitting directly in front of Dave, mumbles something about copies and scurries away.

Dave knows that Jade is right. They haven’t done anything that’s just the two of them for about a month and they haven’t done anything that would be typical of a romantic and sexual relationship in longer. Jade has tried, boy has she tried, to awaken whatever she thinks needs to wake up in Dave. 

“Okay, late dinner tonight.” Dave concedes there is resignation lingering on the tail end of his words.

The smile Jade gives him in return is a little sad. With a deep breath, she regains composure. 

“John, find somewhere else to live for tonight!” She yells across the office for everyone to hear. 

Karkat starts cackling from his office and the sound triggers the smallest of smiles on Dave’s face. 

**\---**

The music fades away and Karkat gives them the signal that they’re off-air. Jade lets out a deep exhale and rests her head on the desk. 

“Good job, everyone. We got this down to the second.” Karkat slurs. They all turn to stare at Karkat when he doesn’t follow up with a long-winded rant about what they could still do better.

Kanaya comes back from the wardrobe area and Dave sees her approach Karkat. Concern overwhelming her features. Dave looks back with worry. He knows Karkat hasn’t been sleeping in the last couple of weeks and at one point, Dave showed up to his house and found him passed out on the kitchen floor. He knows that Karkat is under a lot of pressure lately, as the execs are thinking about selling the station and getting rid of the traditional newscast. 

“Karkat, let’s go home.” She says to him.

Dave’s legs have been moving him towards Karkat without conscious effort. 

“Kan, I’m fine. I haven’t finished some edits. I’ll stay not another hour, max. Then I’ll be home.” Karkat’s brows are knitted together and his eyes are closed when he speaks. His vibrant brown skin looks ashy and dull. 

Karkat notices Dave standing behind Kanaya. He’s still wearing his signature maroon blazer, some casual black chinos, and the black shades that are never missing. He looks fucking delectable and Karkat thanks his lucky stars that he’s still conscious enough to not verbalize the thought aloud. 

Dave puts his hands in his pockets as he approaches. “Go home, Karkat. You look like you’re two steps from the grave.”

“Get lost, Strider,” Karkat tries and Dave grimaces at how weak Karkat’s retort sounds.

Kanaya places a hand on Karkat’s forehead but he pushes her away, “Karkat, sweetheart, I wouldn’t trust you behind the wheel right now.”

Rose and Jade approach them. Their faces are free of makeup and they’re all back in their ordinary clothes. 

“What’s going on?” Jade asks.

“I’m just trying to convince Karkat to go home.”

“I am fine, will everyone just--just fuck off?” Karkat stumbles back, his sight is becoming blurry.

“I have to finish--”

“The edits, yeah we heard you, dude. The edits will be there in the morning. I fucking promise to help you with them in the morning. Go. home.” Dave’s voice is stern and the sound shocks Karkat back into a consciousness that he was unaware he was losing.

Karkat shakes his head and dizziness he’s been ignoring returns.

“In the morning it will be too--”

Karkat doesn’t have the chance to finish because Dave has already moved into his space. He puts his hands on Karkat’s waist and with strength Karkat did not know Dave possessed, he lifts him off the ground and puts him over his shoulder. 

Dave turns to face Kanaya and finds that both she and Rose look relieved-- like they were waiting for someone to just force Karkat to give up.

Karkat feels too tired and weak to fight or feel embarrassed. His eyes seem to be fluttering as his mind flickers in and out of awareness.

“Let’s head to my car,” Kanaya says firmly.

Rose gives Kanaya a quick peck on the cheek, “I’ll make sure everything gets closed up,” She assures them.

Dave looks at Jade, ignoring Karkat’s sudden mumbling and squirming. 

“Let me put him in Kanaya’s car and I’ll meet you at your place.”

Jade is looking at Dave with something resembling confusion, but she nods in response, “I’ll see you there.”

Kanaya says a general goodbye and leads Dave to the car.

They walk in silence apart from Karkat’s incoherent babbling and occasional whimper. Kanaya types away on her phone. 

“The edits!” Karkat whines as Dave buckles him into the passenger seat. Karkat reaches for the collar of Dave’s blazer.

Kanaya helps Dave pry Karkat’s fingers off the fabric, “I already called Sollux, he’s going to help with the last edits.” She pats Karkat’s knee and then returns to buckle herself in.

“How’d the fuck did he make it through the entire broadcast?” Dave whispers.

Kanaya clicks her tongue, “I have no clue. But thank you, Dave. I’ll take him home and make sure he rests.”

**\---**

When Dave finally makes it back to Jade’s house, she’s already setting the table. 

“Hey! Food’s ready.” She greets him with a chaste kiss on the lips.

Jade is wearing the same company hoodie that they all own but hers doesn’t swallow her up the way it does Karkat. 

Dave blinks twice behind his shades at the recognition that he’s comparing his girlfriend with his boss. 

The two of them sit down to eat and Jade starts sharing about her day and some of the stories she’s working on. 

Dave nods as he spoons chicken soup into his mouth. It’s hot and comforting.

“This is really good,” he smiles at Jade, “I bet this would be really good for Karkat right now.”

Jade’s spoon hits her ceramic bowl with a sharp and narrow clink. Her eyebrows are knitted together in thought and her lips form a flat line as she stares at her soup. 

“What are we, Dave?” She finally asks. 

“Uh, Jade, well that’s a heavy philosophical question to drop in the middle of a late dinner before bedtime,” Dave moves his hands beneath the table and rests them on his knees.

“I’m not playing around, Dave! Are we dating? Are--”

Dave tilts his head and feigns confusion, he knows where this conversation is heading, he’s had this same conversation in his head many times.

Jade is out of her seat, “When was the last time we kissed?”

“Just now. When I got here.”

Jade shakes her head, “No, I kissed you. I always kiss you. Dave, you’ve never kissed me!”

Dave’s grip on his knee tightens, “We talked about this. I’m not that into PDA--”

“Even when we’re alone! You never kiss me or respond to any of my advances, even when we are all alone!” Jade’s voice gets louder and her pitch is rising. Tears are welling up in her eyes out of frustration. 

“Dave, we’ve never had sex! We haven’t even moved on from cuddling on,  _ rare occasion _ ! Dave, what am I to you?” her voice gets smaller.

Dave searches within himself, the same way he did when Jade first asked him out. He looks through rooms of his mind, ignoring the doors that he keeps shut, and looks for genuine romantic love for Jade. 

But all he finds is friendship. 

He doesn’t have to say anything because Jade understands. He suspects that she’s always understood that theirs would never go beyond friendship. 

Jade pulls her chair close to Dave. She sits down and takes one of his hands in hers. “I love you, Dave. I do,” she closes her eyes and inhales. When she opens her eyes there are no tears but the sadness is still there.

Dave takes his other hand and cups her face. She leans into him with a gentle smile.

“Jade, I love you too. I just think it’s a different kind of love.” 

He can’t ignore the guilt that sits in his chest. But guilt had made a home inside of Dave from the moment he said yes to Jade. He also can’t ignore the relief that comes over him and that only feeds the guilt too. He doesn’t mean to break his friend’s heart.

When his dad found out that he was dating Jade Harley, that was the first contact he had with his father in years. And despite the trauma and emotional abuse that haunts Dave’s childhood, making things work with Jade felt like an opportunity to settle into being what he needed to be to get his father’s approval. 

That in itself also fills him with a sense of shame. 

But he can’t ignore that regret turns into relief. 

Jade pulls away from Dave after a moment. She takes off her glasses and wipes them on the hem of her pajama shirt. 

“I think you’re going through something, I don’t know what it is, but I think you have to figure that out before you can truly be happy.” 

Dave’s heart rate picks up, he feels like he’s been caught doing something he shouldn’t be, but he can’t see what it is for himself.

He buries it down.

“Jade, you're one of my best friends. I don’t want to lose that.”

Jade laughs. It sounds a little resigned but genuinely amused. 

“It’s okay. We’re still friends. It’ll take me some time but we’re good.”

Dave smiles at her and it feels like the most honest he has smiled at her in a long time. 

**\---**

Dave pulls into the parking lot at work and finds that John is waiting for him outside of his car. 

He scratches the back of his neck.

“I heard about you and Jade.” John doesn’t sound angry in fact, he sounds a little sad.

“Yeah, it was just not working out.”

“Bummer, I was looking forward to us being like bros or something.”

Dave chuckles, “Dude, we’re already bros. Bros for life, remember?”

John flashes a wide toothy smile. 

They both make their way up to the office, chatting with Terezi and Vriska in the elevator. 

“How’s Karkles doing?” Terezi asks.

“Oh yeah, I heard Sollux had to come in and finish his edits for him. Can you believe it?” Vriska laughs. 

Dave narrows his eyes at Vriska but she can’t see it. 

“I mean, he’s been pretty overworked trying to save us from getting fired,” John defends.

Vriska scoffs, “who needs saving? Network television is dying. I’m waiting for this shit to crash and burn so I can finally get the fuck out of here.”

“What’s stopping you from doing it now?” John’s words have a bite that Dave hasn’t heard before.

Vriska shrugs, “It’s fun, right Rezi?” 

Terezi laughs, “It sure is. But I can get why Karkat is so set on saving the news. His crew is so pathetic and all.”

The elevator doors open and the two women step out laughing. John’s mouth is wide open in shock.

“How rude!” he shrieks when the doors close and the elevator starts to move again. 

Dave whistles in agreement. 

When they arrive at their floor and walk into their office it’s pretty quiet. Sollux is in Karkat’s office clicking away at the computer, but Dave doesn’t see Karkat anywhere nearby.

“Do you think Karkat is okay?” John whispers.

Dave knows that Rose and Kanaya spoke over the phone early in the morning and he overheard Karkat’s name be mentioned a couple of times. But Rose left for work soon after and Dave didn’t get to ask her for an update. 

“Good morning boys,” Jade walks up from behind them to greet them. She sips her coffee and smiles shyly at Dave and he returns the gesture. 

Sollux comes out of Karkat’s office. 

“Hey, I left your files in the conference room. They’re Karkat’s notes and instructions for today. I tried parsing through them and they’re kind of all over the place. You can tell the dude is fried. But he seems to think you’re competent enough to get through the show without him.”

John coos, “Aw, Karkat trusts us.”

Sollux laughs, “Yeah, like I said, fried. Anyway, I’ll be back later to help out with the broadcast.”

They thank him and wave goodbye.

Dave heads for the conference room and looks for the folder that has his name scribbled on it.

As he reads over the notes he can’t help laughing. It was definitely written by Karkat, almost every sentence has at least one expletive in it. It must have been written in a stream of consciousness because it jumps from subject to subject without any real direction. 

Dave tucks the folder under his arm and makes his way toward the exit so he can go find Kanaya at wardrobe.

He hasn’t arrived at her door yet but he can already hear her talking to someone. 

“No, No, stay there. Don’t be ridiculous. Everything is fine. Yes. Hasn’t Sollux already called you? Then what are you worried about? Karkat, Karkat! I swear, don’t make me come home.” Kanaya groans in frustration and sighs when she sees that Dave is standing outside her door.

“Here! Your turn!” Kanaya shoves her phone in Dave’s chest.

He takes it and brings it up to his ear.

“Kanaya! Answer me! I’ll be there in fifteen minutes,” there’s the sound of shuffling and something dull hitting the ground, “fuck, wait, shit ow,”

“Dude, just listen. Do whatever Kanaya told you to do.”

“Who is this? Dave? Where’s Kanaya?” Karkat’s voice is hoarse; it's almost painful to hear. 

Dave frowns, “Karkat, bro, you gotta rest. You sound like death. And if you’re any bit like last night, you will die if you try to drive. Kanaya is going to have a conniption if you keep making her worry like this. Hell, I might even have one if you die on us because you decided to come to work when it sounds like you can’t even get dressed without hurting yourself.”

Karkat whines, “If you need anything--”

“We will call Sollux. He already came in and gave us notes. Go to sleep.”

He hears Karkat yawn with an  _ okay, fine _ mixed in. 

“I’m gonna hang up now. Sleep tight,”

Karkat responds with a sleepy, “don’t let the bed bugs bite” and something inside of Dave shakes. It sounds so gentle and vulnerable that Dave feels like someone just draped a warm blanket over him.

He doesn’t want to say anything that might ruin the feeling so he hands back the phone to Kanaya and gives her a thumbs up. Dave moves quickly out of Kanaya’s station and makes his way into one of the bathrooms further down the hall. His heart isn’t racing but it does feel tight. He looks in the mirror and tells himself it’s because he’s worried about his friend. 

Dave pulls his phone out of his pocket, looking for something to distract him and a sudden need cleanse his mind of what he’s feeling. 

He has a text message from Rose asking where he is. He tries to click the text box but his nervous fingers click on images instead. His photo album pops open and even though it’s not the first picture in the album, Dave’s eyes zero in on a sleeping Karkat. 

Dave stares and thinks. Karkat’s soft, sleepy voice rings in his ears.

“Fuck, he’s cute,” Dave whispers as if sharing a secret with no one but himself.

**\---**

  
  
  


The crew gets by. Sollux is a good producer but they’re all used to Karkat’s angry gremlin energy so the broadcast feels stiff. 

They’re all glad it is over when it finally ends. 

“Finally the end of the week!” John cheers before running out.

Dave is hanging his suit up on a rack when Kanaya approaches him.

“Dave, could I ask you for a favor?”

He nods in her direction, “Yeah, what’s up?”

Kanaya already has her purse and coat on, “I have to go get some groceries before I go home. Could you please go check on Karkat? I’d ask Rose but she’s going to finish getting some b-roll with Jade. Please? Just to make sure he’s not dead? Or at the very least that he’s not working.”

Dave pretends like this is a new idea to him like he wasn’t already thinking about stopping by. 

“Yeah, I’ve got it. Take your time.”

Kanaya smiles at him and pats him on the shoulder before turning around and leaving. 

**\---**

  
  
  


Karkat has never been great at personal boundaries. The fact that he’s dated some of his co-workers in the past can attest to that. But he likes to think that he’s gotten better at it. After Jade, he told himself he wouldn’t date anyone he worked with ever again and he likes to think he’s done a pretty good job of that. 

But just because Karkat has good physical boundaries with his team it doesn’t mean his mental boundaries don’t go flying out the window when he sees Dave.

Most of the time when an unprofessional thought creeps into Karkat’s mind he brushes it away. Tells himself not to be a creep, nor to fall into the age-old trope of falling for a straight guy. He can tell that Dave feels uncomfortable when confronted with gayness-- and he wants to think that Dave will work through that shit on his own for the sake of their friendship and his sister, but Karkat is not ready to go down the rabbit hole of trying to court someone who is just not interested in him. Much less one of his reporters. 

So Karkat tries not to think of Dave in any context that is not to do with their friendship or work. That is the rule Karkat tells himself he will not break. 

Yet, when he’s alone in his room late at night, sometimes he looks up porn with keywords like  _ blond  _ and  _ sunglasses _ . If he’s feeling particularly weak, he will look up Dave’s youtube videos and compilations of the  _ top ten moments of dave strider at his hottest _ . 

Tonight, Karkat feels the most rested he has felt in ages. He’s had a glass of old wine that he found in the back of the fridge, he knows his roommate will be home a little later because she told him so, and he blocked Eridan’s number. Which Karkat has done before, but that is neither here nor there. 

Karkat pulls off his sweater and lays back in his bed over his covers. He closes his eyes and puts an arm over them. He lets his other hand wander to the inside of his boxers.

He watched the news, they did pretty well, but Karkat can’t remember how it ended because once they got to Dave’s segment, Karkat could not think about anything else except how good he looked in the tight slacks and white button-up. It was such a simple outfit, something that he has probably worn before, but the way Dave wore it, with the top two buttons undone, his hair looking soft, and those ridiculous glasses-- God, how Karkat wants to crush those glasses, he’s never seen Dave’s eyes because of them and that feels like a travesty to Karkat.

Karkat tries to think back to what it felt like to be picked up by Dave. His mind starts to run through its album of Dave’s moments and faces. Karkat imagines Dave pressing him into the bed with his strength and weight over Karkat. He wonders if Dave’s face would open up in intimacy. Maybe he would smile in a way that Karkat hasn’t seen yet, or would he just use one of his signature asshole smirks? Dave’s cool smirk flashes in his mind and Karkat feels his dick twitch. He takes it as an invitation to take it into his hand and begin slowly stroking it with a light grip.

Would Dave kiss him? What would that be like? Soft or rough? He sees Dave apply lip balm constantly so he imagines that his lips would taste of a sickly sweet apple but it would be worth it to feel his soft lips pressed against Karkat’s skin. Those glasses take up so much of Dave’s face that his most expressive feature is his mouth, which has given Karkat a fixation on Dave's mouth. All Karkat wants to do is kiss Dave’s mouth and he knows he could probably orgasm with that alone.

Karkat’s breathing gets heavier and the hand on his dick tightens a little.

What would Dave want? Would he want Karkat to get on his knees and take him in his mouth? Warmth pools and spreads in Karkat’s groin at the thought of having Dave’s penis in his mouth. Feeling as it hardens in Karkat’s mouth as he works on it, making it slippery with his saliva. He wants to see Dave become undone, his stoic facade unraveled at the pleasure that Karkat can give him. He wants Dave to bring a hand to his hair and tug him close, maybe even keep him there so Dave can fuck into Karkat’s mouth. 

A soft moan leaves Karakt’s lips and his strokes pick up the pace, using the precum that’s started to gather as a lubricant. 

Karkat bites his bottom lip and thinks about Dave pulling him up, face flushed and blissed out, and when he kisses Karkat he can taste himself on his lips. Karkat pretends he can feel the ghost of Dave’s hands running up and down his back, Dave’s elegant fingers digging into his hips as they start to grind on each other. 

Outside of his imagination, Karkat’s breathing is getting frantic and his heart is racing. His hips push into his hand as he thinks about what it would feel like to be pressed against Dave and to hear him whisper Karkat’s name as he came. 

**\---**

Dave knocks on Karkat’s door and receives no answer. He knocks again and when there is still no response he starts to worry. Dave reaches for the door and immediately becomes alert when the door just swings open. 

The hallway is dark but there is light coming in from the television in the living room. Dave moves in quietly either expecting to see an intruder or at the very best, that Karkat is asleep in front of the television. 

When he goes into the room there is no one there. His heart starts racing as he starts to imagine the worst. He knows Karkat is paranoid as hell and would never just leave the front door open. He grabs an empty bottle of wine from the coffee table and steps back into the hall.

He makes his way quietly into the house and sees that there is light coming in from one of the bedrooms. There’s the sound of something coming from inside and Dave tightens his grip on the bottle.

Dave hears it before he reaches the door. Breathy gasps that come in consecutive rhythm. Dave freezes where he is standing in the dark hallway with his hands tightly wrapped around a wine bottle. A moan breaks the string of gasps and Dave feels as if his stomach has caught fire. Each moan and gasp that follows pushes the heat in every direction of Dave’s body. 

He hears Karkat whimper something he can’t quite make out but at the sound of Karkat’s voice, Dave’s pants get tighter. 

  
  


Dave knows he needs to walk away. Or at the very least make his presence known. But Dave’s feet are rooted in the floor and he can’t bring himself to move. It is creepy and invasive for him to be standing outside of Karkat’s door and listening to him masturbate without his knowledge or consent, but Dave’s brain can only process so much at the sound of his boss and friend getting closer and closer to a climax. He can’t see Karkat, thank god, but when Dave closes his eyes he imagines his friend sprawled out on the bed with his naked body and face flushed with the warm feeling of pleasure. Dave’s hands twitch on the bottle and he tells himself that he can’t go there, he can’t touch himself. That he  _ doesn’t  _ want to touch himself. 

He hears an  _ oh, fuck _ followed by a drawn-out moan and Dave feels his knees ready to give out. His panic riddled brain manages to quietly move back from the door. He hears shuffling coming from the room and Dave breaks into longer strides. When he makes it to the door he swings it open and has the sense to not slam it behind him. 

Kanaya is pulling into the driveway as Dave makes his way down the steps. She waves at him before her expression twists into something worried. Dave looks rattled and lost as he is still clutching an empty bottle of wine to his chest. 

She rushes out of the car and Dave scrambles to look for his keys in his pockets.

“Dave, what’s wrong? Is Karkat okay?” 

Dave’s mouth and throat are dry and he’s not sure if he’ll be able to answer Kanaya aloud.

He shakes his head and exhales at the feeling of his keys in his sweater pocket.

Kanaya is moving towards him but she keeps glancing back to the front door, “Dave! Is Karkat okay?”

Dave gasps, he realizes that he’s not breathing right, that his chest feels like it’s caving in.

“Fine,” Dave manages to push out. His hands are shaking so much he can’t even press the unlock button. Kanaya reaches for Dave and when he feels her hands on his shoulders he jumps back and slides down against the car. 

Kanaya can see that he’s panicking, and hyperventilating, she can’t believe she hadn’t noticed before when she has sat through anxiety attacks with Karkat so countless times before. 

“Kanaya? Is everything okay?” 

At the sound of Karkat’s voice, Dave’s breathing gets shallower and he grabs on to Kanaya’s legs. He feels so small and the mere thought of Karkat finding him like this makes him feel like he might die.

Kanaya holds her hands up, “Go back inside!” she yells.

“What! No--”

Dave‘s vision is going blurry and the sounds around him begin to become distorted. 

“Now, Karkat! Inside!” Dave has never heard Kanaya speak so loud or with such aggressive command in her tone. 

He hears Karkat stomp away and the sound of the door closing after a moment. 

Kanaya kneels in front of Dave. He’s leaning forward with his head in between his knees. Tears are rolling down his cheeks and it makes Dave feel like he’s being shrouded by a familiar blanket of shame.

“Dave, I need you to breathe with me okay? Try to match my breathing.” Kanaya’s voice is soft.

He waits for her to start and without looking up he starts to match her rhythm.

They breathe together for a few minutes until Dave finally looks up. Kanaya is looking at him full of compassion and relief and it makes him feel a little twisted. She must recognize that he’s starting to panic again because she starts breathing in rhythm again and he follows suit. She hands Dave a green handkerchief and he takes it to wipe his tears and nose. 

“Don’t tell anyone about this, please?” Kanaya’s heart breaks a little at the sound of his voice. It reminds her of childhood days when Karkat would confess about bullying that happened at school. They both sound so innocent and defeated. 

“Of course not,” she smiles, “Do you want to talk about it?”

Dave shakes his head, he knows he can’t talk about whatever happened because he’s not entirely sure he knows why he reacted the way he did. 

Kanaya sits in silence with him until he says, “I need to get home.” 

She stands up and offers him a hand. Dave takes it and uses it to steady himself as his legs remember how to function.

“Do you want me to take you home?” she asks.

“I’m good, thank you.”

Kanaya chews on her lip, “Okay, but pull over if you start to feel ill. And call me if you need anything okay? To talk or a ride, anything. Understood?”

Dave can’t help but smile at Kanaya. He finds himself thinking that she’s a perfect match to Rose. He doesn’t think he has ever expressed that to either of them. 

“I’m glad you’re with Rose. That she has you in her life and all.”

Kanaya smiles big and her face lights up, “Me too, I’m glad Rose is in my life.”

Dave gets in his car and turns the key in the ignition. He’s pulling out of the driveway and he notices that the living room curtain is swaying and catches the shadow of someone backing away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter four! I think things are moving forward. I am slowly making my way towards a happy ending! Thank you for reading


	5. two days

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dave spends most of the weekend coming to terms with his feelings and takes the time to talk to Rose about it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please note that Dave has a conversation with his homophobic dad.

It is Sunday night and Dave is considering calling in sick to work for the millionth time this weekend. He has drafted an email, a text, and rehearsed a phonecall for Karkat but he hasn’t had the nerve to follow through with any of it.

Kanaya is true to her word and doesn’t tell Rose about the anxiety attack. Dave is grateful for it because his suddenly contemplative and quiet demeanor has her worried already. He wonders what excuse or how much Kanaya has shared with Karkat, he saw the shadow in the window, there’s no way Karkat missed seeing Dave falling apart in the driveway. At the very least he had walked out to see Kanaya and Karkat would have to be blind not to have noticed Dave’s car next to Kanaya’s. 

Dave walks out of the shower and can hear Rose talking to someone in the kitchen. 

“Uh-huh. Is that so? We are well. I’ve been busy. Yes, I’m still dating-- Fa-- This is not--”

He doesn’t need to hear much else to piece together that Rose is speaking to their dad over the phone. 

Dave walks over to the laundry closet and drops his clothes in the bin before passing by his open bedroom and picking up his glasses to place them back where they belong. He quietly makes his way to the kitchen. 

“I think he’s in the shower. I- No, I’m not comfortable speaking on his behalf,” Rose is resting her forehead in the palm of her hand. Her eyes are tightly closed in frustration. 

Dave drops a gentle and on her shoulder and nods at her when she turns to look at him.

He extends his hand to her and Rose places the phone in it without a word. 

It is not lost on Dave that Rose’s threshold for their dad’s bullshit was was much shorter than his own. Dave had years of experience perfecting and building that barrier, a consequence of his dad taking him in the divorce. 

He takes a deep breath and reminds himself that he is no longer within his Dad’s reach.

“Hello?” Dave’s voice is leveled and practiced.

_ “Dave.” _

“Hi Dad, How are you?” 

_ “Nice of you to give a shit. I had to call your sister to get ahold of you. You haven’t called.”  _

Dave’s dad sounds neither sad nor disappointed. It is more of an annoyance and rote dialogue. As if he remembered that he had an obligation as a father.

“I’ve been busy with work and all.”

_ “Busy, huh. Has your sister turned you gay yet?” _

Dave grimaces at the question. It didn’t take long for the topic to shift.

“That’s not how it works. You can’t catch gayness,” Dave glances up to where Rose is washing dishes. One of her eyebrows is arched as she aggressively scrubs at a dish.

His dad grunts over the phone,  _ “At least you didn’t turn out to be a--” _

Dave pulls the phone away from his ear before his dad can finish the sentence. Rose glances bad at Dave.

This is not the first time Dave’s father has expressed the sentiment. As children, he made examples of tragic gay narratives. They became boogymen and cautionary tales for Dave and Rose. But it was always removed. When Rose came out via publicly dating Kanaya only months ago, their father wasted no time demonizing the relationship. Whether it was through praising himself at having raised the good son as if heterosexuality and gayness were taught. 

Dave has quietly sat through it before. Years of developed instincts taught him that any rebuttal was going to end badly for Dave and he doesn’t doubt his dad would double down on harassing Rose. 

Not this time. He can’t hear it. Not when he’s still twisted and reeling from confronting his own thoughts and urges around the matter. It’s been two days since the incident and as much as he tries not to think about it, whenever he sits still for too long, he can still hear Karkat’s moans. 

Dave can hear his dad’s muffled voice still coming through the phone. He brings the phone back up to his ear.

“ _ Are you listening?” _

“Sorry, didn’t catch that.”

“ _ I asked how things with Jade are going?” _

“Oh. We’re not together anymore.”

There’s a brief pause, “ _ You managed to fuck that up quick.” _

Rose walks over and sits down next to Dave at the table. She picks up the knitting basket that somehow is always nearby.

“Yeah, well that’s usually how it goes.”

“ _ That girl has been pining for you since you were kids and you still managed to miss. Do you at least have another girlfriend lined up?” _

Dave narrows his eyes and pushes Karkat’s face out of his mind.

“Why are you so obsessed with me dating al of a sudden?”

Another pause.

_ “People are going to assume you are a homosexual if you don’t have a girlfriend or better yet, get married to a woman. I’ve seen some comments and pictures online--” _

“What pictures?” Dave’s voice doesn’t falter but his heartbeat picks up. 

_ “It’s you and some guy. It looks like you’re at a hotel.” _

Dave shoots out of his chair, startling Rose. He rushes to his bedroom and looks for his laptop. 

“I haven’t been to a hotel-- I mean months ago I was at a work dinner at a hotel. But I haven’t seen any pictures,” He’s voice is faltering as he scrambles to log in with his dad on speakerphone. 

_ “Well some folks called you fruity and gay on the comments and you gotta dispel those rumors before they bite you in the ass. You can’t be having the whole world thinking you’re a homosexual. We get enough shit from your sister.” _

Dave quickly types his name into the search bar. 

Most of the results are for video clips on youtube, either from work or his own youtube channel. 

He sees a link to an Instagram hashtag and he clicks it. It’s more of the same with some scattered pictures of him with fans and memes people have made out of his youtube video. Dave is scrolling through the hashtag confused at what his dad could possibly be talking about when he sees a photoset that stops him in his tracks. 

There are three pictures that he can scroll through. The first one is of Dave, a fan, and Karkat. The girl is holding the phone up to fit all three of them in the selfie, Dave has his arm around Karkat and his pulling him in by his face. Karkat is glaring in the picture, he’s clearly annoyed at having been pulled in. The image itself is harmless. 

Dave clicks and slides to the next picture. It is a hell of a lot more incriminating. 

It looks like Dave has his arms around Karkat, who has his head thrown back to look up at Dave. There’s foliage that is obstructing the view so it doesn’t show that Dave is actually holding Karkat up from tripping. Karkat’s face is flushed from the alcohol and he has an adorably confused expression on his face. Dave looks as stoic as ever, save for the slight uptick at the corner of his lips that make it look like he’s smirking at Karkat. Maybe he was. 

Dave’s heart is racing. His dad is saying something, he’s close to yelling, and in a panic inspired move, Dave ends the call. 

His fingers are trembling when he clicks on the next picture. 

Whatever twists and knots that Dave harbored before loosen and unravel when he sees it.

The last photo has the best quality. It isn’t rushed or secretive. It centers both Dave and Karkat as they are leaning on the railing. Karkat is talking about something and his hands are in motion. He looks soft and still incredibly hot. Dave is leaning into Karkat and watching him with an unabashed smile on his face. 

Dave has always prided himself on his impenetrable poker face but will concede that he finds himself unaware of how much he’s smiling around Karkat. 

  
  


The picture is harmless but Dave feels like he’s been undeniably damned. 

There are hardly any views on the picture and he’s surprised how his dad even found it. But Dave clicks to open the comments. 

  
  


> **Dreamer.child:** OMG you met Dave Strider?!
> 
> **Kara.Anna:** Yes!! And he’s just as hot in person.
> 
> **IRL_queenie:** UMMM…. I want to know who the other guy is. HE IS CUTE AF.
> 
> **Dreamer.child:** RIGHT?? He totally had this grouchy but lovable vibe. 
> 
> **Ut00b.simp:** Is DAVE STRIDER gay?? My heart!!!
> 
> **Kara.Anna:** IDK, he was dating some news anchor right? But these two were so cute. I felt like a creep watching them have a moment but I just HAD TO.
> 
> **Ut00b.simp:** They do look really cute together.

  
  


Dave scrolls back up to the picture. It looks so right. It feels right. He lets his mind entertain the idea that maybe he’s looking at a couple having a night out. He wonders what that would be like. To be able to take Karkat out.

“Dave?” Rose knocks on his door. “Are you okay? Can I have my phone back?”

Rose cautiously pushes the door open. Dave catches her glancing at the computer screen and he quickly pulls it shut.

She moves closer and sits on the edge of the bed next to her brother. 

Dave takes a deep breath and hands her the phone.

“Are you okay?” she looks down at her phone and frowns, “There are four missed calls from dad.”

“Oh. Yeah. I kind of hung up on him.”

Rose clicks her tongue, “Finally got fed up? I am glad you have finally learned to start removing toxic figures from your life. I am very proud of you. Our father, despite having raised the best brother I could ask for if what he did can really be called raising, is not worth entertaining.” She sounds serious but you see the twinkle in her eye.

Dave shifts his body so he’s facing Rose. He doesn’t look at her, he focuses his gaze on his hands as they rest on his knees.

“Rose,” he starts. He doesn’t know if he has it in him to finish. If he opens this can of worms with Rose there’s no going back. 

“Rose, when did you know you were gay?” 

Her eyes go wide and Dave immediately wishes he could pull back his words. He tries to think of a joke or something to play off the question as a joke. 

“I-I’m not sure?” she admits, “I think I’ve always suspected that I might be. My crushes on boys growing up were primarily fictional. Or very shortlived. But I think I really understood my inclination towards romantic and sexual desire in college? I dated a little. I tried dating men and found that I did not like that at all. Or at least it did not feel as right as dating and being with women. Yeah, I think things clicked once I had the chance to actually date whoever I wanted.” She watches Dave closely as she speaks. He hasn’t moved.

“Why do you ask, Dave?” 

Dave tries to swallow but his mouth is dry, “I don’t know. I was curious. We’ve never really talked about it. I had no idea you were dating women in college. Why didn’t you tell me?”

Rose takes one Dave’s hands and holds it in her own, “I knew that it would put a strain on our relationship especially since you were still living with Dad. And it didn’t seem too important to be quite frank. None of the relationships I had in college felt very long term. There was no one I wanted my family to really meet or know about. Not until Kanaya.” She smiles at the mention of her girlfriend. 

Rose takes a hand and gingerly lifts Dave’s face so she can meet his eyes. 

“But truly, why do you ask?” Her gaze is a little more steely. She looks at Dave like she already knows the answer but knows that he needs the opportunity to verbalize it.

Dave tries to pull away but Rose tightens her grip on his hand. 

“You know that I’ll love you no matter what. So will our friends. Even our alcoholic mother will still love you. I can’t promise anything about Dad, but I promise I will always love you enough to make up for it.”

Dave clenches his free hand into a fist, “I had an anxiety attack.” 

“When? Why didn’t you tell me?”

“On Friday. At Karkat’s house after work. Or I guess it was his driveway.”

Rose nods, “What triggered it?”

Dave bites his lip and asks himself how much of himself and his turmoil is he willing to put on the table. 

He closes his eyes, “I--Uh--Karkat I guess?”

Rose squeezes his hand, “Did he do something?” 

Dave shakes his head, “No, no. Not really. I mean technically he doesn’t know I was there. Kanaya was getting home when she found me and helped me calm back down.” 

Rose flinches, “No Rose, she wasn’t keeping anything from you. I begged her not to tell you. Or anyone. She’s checked in with me and advised me to talk to you. I’ve just been too busy overthinking things probably.”

Rose nods again, “Okay. So Karkat triggered your panic attack but he doesn’t know it?”

“Yes. But uh, I don’t want to tell you-- it’s not for me to say because I was really invading his privacy. Even if it was on accident. But this isn’t just like a thing that happened and I had this moment. No, I think, after talking to my dad, and the pictures, I think this was just the last straw? Do you ever lie to yourself Rose? Like you pretend that something or someone isn’t having an effect on you? I’ve lived probably my whole life toeing a line where I’ve just felt like I might be-- like-- like you said things just didn’t feel super right? Even with Jade. And I wanted that to work out. I really did. Of all of my relationships, being with Jade made the most sense. But then it didn’t? It didn’t feel natural? Like it was too much work?”

“Breath, Dave.”

“Yeah, I’m breathing. Oh god, but with Karkat,” Dave’s voice cracks at his name, “it all feels better? Or like it could be, right? If I let myself think about it it’s too much. I overthink it and Dad’s fucking cautionary tales chase me around. But when I just let my thoughts be, I want to know what it’s like. To be with Karkat. To date him like I was dating Jade. Rose. I think I might be gay. Oh my god, I might be gay for Karkat.”

  
  


Rose is biting her tongue but she’s nodding as she listens to her brother.

“Rose, sometimes I stare at his picture. Has Kanaya shown you the sleeping picture? He’s so fucking cute in it. I sometimes stare at it until I fall asleep. And I know that Karkat fucks! Rose, he fucks! God, I hate that he fucks other people. I mean I’ve seen the shit Eridan sends him!”

“How?”

“That’s not important. But I kind of really hate this guy. I don’t like him at all. Kanaya doesn’t trust him and neither do I. And I don’t want Eridan to fuck Karkat. Or the other way around. That’s not for him. He deserves better.”

“Uh-huh, He deserves you?”

Dave blushes, “What, no? Maybe? I’m too fucking insecure and essentially a virgin in this area. Karkat deserves someone who will do-- treat him right and I don’t think this Eridan guy is the one.”

Rose pats his knee, “I mean, Jade said Karkat was a very patient lover.”

Dave groans and throws himself back in his bed. He doesn’t want to think about what it means for Karkat to be a patient lover. Not with his sister in the room. 

“I can’t stop thinking about him.” He whispers.

“I know.”

“Why though? He’s angry and my boss! And a man! And shouty.”

“But also sweet, caring, actually very cute, he’s also very intelligent even though is actually wouldn’t lead you to believe that. He’s incredibly insecure even though he was actually very popular in college.”

“He was?”

“Oh yes. I think he wore his heart on his sleeve too often though. He got his heart broken too often, which is probably how he ended up in this cycle with Eridan.”

Rose lays back next to Dave.

“Take your time little brother. Let yourself figure out your feelings. There’s no rush. I will be here to support you no matter what.

“Thanks, Rose. Are you going to tell Kanaya?”

“That’s not for me to share, is it? But,”

“But?”

“I mean, we kind of figured.”

Dave babbles for a moment like a fish out of water. 

“I mean, neither of you hides the way you look at each other very well. Kanaya has shared some interesting stories, and I of course reciprocated in like. I think it’s cute.”

Dave lets the butterflies in his stomach flutter around. It feels a lot better to have things kind of out in the open. 

“What does Kanaya say?”

Rose sits up and bops his nose on her way up. 

“That’s for me to know and for you to figure out on your own.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all, I wrote this chapter twice. And both went in completely different directions. I know this was kind of dry but I am really working towards a more proactive Dave! We are at a halfway point and I want to get to the fun stuff! I was so frustrated with myself that I didn't read over this so...
> 
> Again, thanks to those who are reading! I hope to bring the tension in chapter 6!


	6. three days

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The gang makes plans to celebrate one last time before the station shuts down. Dave is making peace with his realized feelings for Karkat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Full disclosure, this is like a filler chapter. It's a little shorter because it's part of a chapter that ended up being like 11k words. I had to split it up...

It is no surprise that a small town with no real big events happening would not have the most robust news media. Karkat and his crew often find themselves reporting on things that most residents already know via word of mouth and small-town gossip. So the fact that the executives at the national branch want to shut them down is not a surprise. 

The fact that the station could be shut down is always in the back of his mind so when he sees the calendar invite when he turns on the computer, Karkat is not surprised.

His breakfast does, however, still turn rock solid and sinks in his stomach. 

**\---**

Dave has managed to keep his cool for most of the week. There hasn’t been a need to avoid Karkat much because other than quick briefings, the producer has spent the majority of the week locked in his office yelling at people over the phone and aggressively printing files. 

“Hey, Strider. What’s up?”

At Sollux’s greeting Dave realizes he has been staring at Karkat’s door for a while. 

Sollux is wearing a blue button-up shirt. It’s nothing super fancy but it’s a jarring contrast to his usual attire of jeans and t-shirts. 

“Not much. What brings you up to our sad corner of the world?”

Sollux doesn’t have the opportunity to respond because his attention is drawn to Karkat as he steps out of his office. 

Dave hasn’t seen Karkat at all this morning. The door has been uncharacteristically closed with blinds drawn from well before Dave or anyone else arrived for work. Karkat is wearing a black sweater with a gray collar popping out from beneath it. It’s not unusual to see Karkat wearing some sort of business casual clothing but his hair is also combed down.

“Man, you look like a dork.”

Karkat hisses at Dave, “Fuck off, asshole. You look like a piece of shit.”

Dave pretends to be wounded and spins back in his chair. 

“We are meeting in the conference room?” Sollux asks. 

“Yeah. Let’s head over there. Feferi will be here soon.”

Dave throws Karkat a questioning head nod but Karkat quietly shakes his head in response.

“We’re just meeting with execs. I’ll update all of you afterward.” Karkat taps Dave’s head with his folder and follows Sollux down the hall. 

John, who has been quietly watching the exchange, throws a pen cap at Dave. 

“Do you think we’re getting shut down?” he pretends to whisper.

“Isn’t it kind of normal for producers to meet with other higher-ups for updates?”

John leans forward on his desk, “Yeah, but I was talking to Vriska and Terezi the other day--”

“Since when are you hanging out with  _ Fair Play _ ?”

“I wouldn’t call it hanging out. More like they pester me into buying them drinks and shit--Anyways! They said that Feferi has been printing and organizing stats for the show. Vriska said we would be shut down by the end of the week. All productions halted.”

“Well, I wouldn’t believe everything Vriska says.”

John and Dave jump in their seats at the sound of Feferi’s voice. 

“Be patient, cuties. We will have a chance to clear the air once this meeting gets put behind us.”

John’s face goes pink as he shrinks behind his computer. 

Feferi winks at both of them before making her way to the conference room. 

They slip back into their work routine until it’s lunchtime.

“You sure you don’t want to join us?” Jade smiles at Dave. 

His gaze slides to the conference door at the end of the hall. It’s been quiet, save for the occasional outburst from Karkat. 

“Yeah, I’m going to try and finish some stuff.”

Neither Jade nor John fights him on the subject and they waste no time leaving to meet the others for lunch. 

He’s still typing away at his computer when he hears the conference room door open and voices flood the hall.

“Do you think they’ll want to meet now?” Feferi asks.

“It’s short notice and we still have to do a live broadcast tonight,” Karkat responds. 

“So we wait for tomorrow morning?”

“They’ll want to know now,”

“Yeah, I agree. I kind of already told Dave that I would give everyone an update today.”

“Okay, so do you all want to tell each of your teams or should we have them all meet together?”

“If we are doing what Feferi suggested, I think it’s best we get everyone together. How keen do you think your teams are on meeting later tonight?”

“After your show?”

Feferi hums, “I’ll check, but I’m sure my team is down.”

“Yeah, I’ll check but it should be fine. Dude, Karkat stop looking like someone stabbed you in the gut. It’s going to be okay.”

The three of them stop and quiet down when they step into the work area. Karkat scans the room and ends with his eyes on Dave.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” 

Dave shrugs, “Working? Duh.”

Karkat rolls his eyes but slips into John’s seat. He waves at Sollux and Feferi who promise to text with confirmations.

“Since when do you work?” Karkat tries to smirk at Dave but the deflection isn’t lost on him.

Dave pushes and rolls himself to the other side of the desk so that he can be closer to Karkat. Recognizing his crush on his boss has been a whirlwind of emotions, mostly caution and fear that maybe everyone he knows will just see his questioning sexuality projected on his face, but any worry that Dave was feeling about what people might think gets thrown out the window when he sees Karkat leaning on John’s desk, his eyes full of grief. 

“Yo, Karkat, are you okay?” Dave lets his hand rest on Karkat’s back. Part of him expects Karkat to pull away but he lets it stay.

Karkat sighs, “Okay. Don’t panic. But. They’re shutting the station down by the end of the year.”

“Hey, that’s not too bad. That gives plenty of time to plan.”

Karkat lets himself fall and hides his face in his crossed arms. 

Dave’s fingers twitch. He wants to move his hand up and let his fingers get buried in Karkat’s soft locks.

He’s still thinking about it by the time he realizes he is already stroking and scratching Karkat’s head. He hears Karkat’s quiet sigh at the feeling and Dave has to take the quietest breath to keep himself from bringing any attention to his bright red face.

“You shouldn’t skip lunch,” Karkat says after a moment. 

“You skip lunch all of the time.”

“No, I don’t.”

“Yeah, you do. Kanaya complains about it all of the time. She thinks you’re going to get an ulcer from it.”

“She worries too much.”

Dave nods even though Karkat can’t see him. He keeps running his fingers through Karakt’s hair. 

“We’re not going to get to work together anymore.” 

Dave stops and pulls his hand back. That thought hadn’t crossed his mind. He had only been officially part of the team for a few months but he knew Karkat and the rest of the crew had been together for the better part of three years. Most of them had gone to school with each other and the whole operation was really a bunch of friends who reported on the news together. 

Karkat sits up and rubs his eyes, “I’m so tired. I’m so fucking tired. I thought we could convince them that the station was worth keeping. But our news is barely anything. We’re already reporting on national news. Might as well just consolidate and slot in an actual national news show.”

“Do you want me to set shit on fire, so we have more news to report? I mean it. I can go full villain or vigilante on this shit.”

Dave manages to get Karkat to chuckle, and it feels like a triumph. He waits for the shame to settle in, and when it does, Dave realizes it is only in passing as if the guilt he had been holding on to for feeling good about Karkat could be scared away by Karkat’s genuine smile. 

“You’re so fucking ridiculous,” He reaches up and ruffles his own hair. It takes back it’s usual shape of chaos.

“I mean, I would be fulfilling some intense childhood fantasies.”

“You could burn down the whole town and I don’t think you’d be able to keep us on air.”

Dave watches Karkat get out of his seat, “Is everyone at lunch?” Dave nods, “And they didn’t take you with them? Yikes, sucks to be a fucking loser, I guess.”

Dave stands up and chuckles, “Yeah, yeah, just a pair of losers sitting in the office while their friends live it up.”

Karkat’s face twists into a scowl but he can’t keep it together for long. He bursts into laughter that is equal parts tired and amused.

“Fuck you, let’s go get lunch.”

**\---**

It’s ten at night and the three show producers are standing at the front of the conference room. They are huddled together whispering to each other while the room fills up with tired faces. Everyone except the news crew had already gone home for the night. 

Dave settles into a seat at the table between Rose and John. 

The room is buzzing with conversation. John is arguing with Terezi in irritated tones, Terezi’s loud cackle rings in the air drawing Dave and Rose’s attention and they don’t miss the blush creeping up John’s neck and into his cheeks.

Dave turns to look at Rose when he feels her poke at his side. She’s grinning and wiggling her eyebrows and it makes Dave chuckle. 

“Okay! Listen up you--”

“Karkat, be nice!” Feferi interrupts.

“Just tell us we’re fired so we can go back to our lives,” Vriska heckles.

“We’re not fired yet,” Sollux adds.

“But we  _ are  _ fired, right?” 

“Vriska, if you let us speak you’ll have your answers,” Feferi chides.

Karkat is standing to the side pinching the bridge between his eyes. There is a brief moment that his eyes shoot up and his gaze falls on each of his distracted team members until they land on Dave who is looking back at him. 

Dave gives him an encouraging smile, it’s small and it feels like a private moment between them. Karkat has noticed that in the last couple of days something about the way that Dave carries himself has changed. He seems a little more on edge, skittish, but it also feels like he’s more open.

Maybe it’s because Karkat isn’t expecting such a genuine reaction from Dave, but Karkat smiles back, just as quiet and private. 

Kanaya doesn’t miss the exchange and when she looks at her girlfriend, it’s obvious that it hasn’t been lost on Rose either.

“Okay, That’s actually everyone now. Let’s get this started. Listen up and ask questions later!” Feferi announces.

Both Sollux and Feferi step back and they turn to look at Karkat.

“Who? Me? Fuck y’all,” Karkat groans.

  
  


He crosses his arms and widens his stance, it’s one that his coworkers know well, it often signals that Karkat is going into his professional mode.

“Alright, so Feferi, Sollux, and I along with some other producers at other small stations, were called to a conference with the executives at the network. They gave us some long-winded bullshit about numbers and consolidating funding based on viewership. The way that they are rolling out the shutdown is in phases based on station ratings.”

“Where do we land?” Nepeta asks.

“In a really good place, actually,” Karkat assures, “It looks like out of all the stations on the proverbial chopping block, all of our programming has some of the highest ratings and numbers despite our audience being a small ass town.”

“Which means?” Aradia trails off.

“We will continue business as usual until the end of the year. Meaning we have about three to four months left at the station.”

Silence falls over the conference room.

Jade is the one that breaks it, “So we should be looking into auditions and applying to other positions? Or is the network going to be transferring us around?”

This time Karkat is the one to step back and nods at Sollux.

“So they’re thinking about doing some transferring of positions. But it’s kind of free for all. My plan is to pitch  _ Aradia Explores _ to a few different networks, and we were told they want to retain as many people as they can from the reporting media, I know that they’re going to be looking at samples from all of their crews nationwide.”

“Honestly, this is the best time to kind of think about what you want to do, and move from there,” Karkat is looking at Jade. “We’ve talked about goals and avenues before when we were-- uh,” he blushes, “Yeah, anyways-- I can write you a kick-ass letter of rec and help you piece together audition tapes. And that goes for all of you,” he motions at his crew. 

“Thank you, Karkat!” John cheers.

“Ugh, could you not be such a boy scout?” Vriska teases.

This makes a lot of folks laugh and the tension dissipates. 

Feferi steps up and takes the laughter as her cue.

“So! We have been talking about it and since we have access to the established budget and also know we are shutting down regardless of whatever happens by the end of this year, we have decided that we should go on one last big station retreat!”

Dave watches as the room erupts into excitement. Karkat crosses his arms and rolls his eyes at the commotion. 

“What’s going on?” He asks Rose.

“It’s something we used to do as a yearly thing. It is supposed to be a team-building thing that the network pays for but it’s usually just everyone getting drunk and being rowdy in the woods.”

“I believe the last one we attended was the first time we really connected, right, love?” Kanaya appears from behind Rose and Rose leans in for a soft kiss on the cheek.

“I think you are right. And Karkat has never attended, right? Not that I can remember,” Rose bites the inside of her cheek to keep from grinning back at Dave.

He looks away and dissimulates to be unbothered. 

“That’s true!” John joins the conversation, “Karkat! You have to go to this one! It’s our last family outing!”

“Don’t tell me what to do, Egbert!” Karkat barks over the loud room.

“Do not worry, John. I will make sure he is there,” Kanaya smiles up at Karkat in a way that is very reminiscent of a Lalonde scheme expression. 

Feferi calls the room back to attention, “This is going to be so much fun! Same place? Next weekend? Since it’s an extended holiday weekend and we have some specials slotted?” 

A chorus of ‘yes’ and ‘that works’ flutters through the room.

“Okay! I’ll start the group chat! Now everyone, go home and get some rest!”

No one questions the dismissal and people quickly file out of the room cheerfully making plans as if they were not just told that they would be out of a job by the end of the season. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your comments and readership. It means the world to me and writing for y'all has given me something to look forward to as work starts to kick my butt!


	7. one week

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's time for a work retreat! Dave and Karkat find themselves on their own for most of the day. They drink, get a little high, and a little honest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is! It is the longest chapter and I hope the pacing is okay. 
> 
> Please keep in mind that there are drinking and recreational marijuana use in this chapter!

“I’ll drive,” Karkat says, snatching the keys to the car before Kanaya can take them. “I would like to get there in one piece.”

Kanaya concedes and grabs her small suitcase and drags it out of the house. She locks the door behind her while Karkat tosses his duffle bag in the back seat. 

It’s a long drive out to the house in the woods that Feferi has rented out but it allows the crew to have their privacy. Feferi wasted no time delegating tasks to each group,  _ Fair Play  _ is in charge of entertainment,  _ Aradia Explores _ is covering drinks/etc., and the News crew would handle food--Something that Jade and Rose insisted on being in charge of. 

“ _ No one brought food last time, Karkat. We were starving!”  _ Jade cried. 

“I am glad you are joining us this time,” Kanaya turns the volume on the radio down.

“I figure I should participate since it’s the last time and all. I’m not looking forward to it a whole lot though. We are going to be out in the woods forced to stare at each other for a whole weekend. That sounds like nightmare fuel.”

Kanaya smiles and leans on the passenger window, “It is a good opportunity to get to know people.”

Karkat snorts, “Yeah, I don’t think there’s a point to that anymore.”

“Just because we won’t be working together anymore, it does not mean we cannot continue to foster our friendships, Karkat.” 

Karkat’s face falls into a solemn expression, “Kanaya, how long have we known each other?”

“Oh dear, we have known each other since we were children. Decades.”

“Okay, and we’ve been living together for almost four years right? When I graduated from college we moved in together.”

“Mhmm,” Kanaya sits back up and turns to look at Karkat whose gaze is fixed on the road in front of them.

“And I guess, I know you have a right to have your own life. But I’m not ready, or at least I’m kind of really fucking freaked out by the prospect that we won’t be together anymore.” Karkat’s voice gets rough, he’s been thinking about this since the execs announced their plan. They had gotten lucky when they were both offered jobs at the same location, he had gotten so used to having his best friend nearby that he couldn’t imagine life miles away.

“Oh, Karkat, I have every intention of marrying Rose. And as much as I love you like my own little brother, I have no desire to have you living with us during the first years of our newlywed life. Maybe after. But I hope that by then you have found your person to share the abundance of love and rage your little body is overflowing with,” She scratches the back of his head familiarly. 

Karkat exaggeratedly blinks three times, “Wait. You’re going to marry Rose?” 

Kanaya pulls away and sighs. It is a lovely, giddy sound, “Yes. I was actually thinking about proposing this weekend. She is the one, Karkat. I love her so much, I cannot imagine spending my life with anyone else. When I am with Rose, I feel like I am the truest and most authentic version of myself. I never thought I would find someone who makes me feel so complete.”

Karkat steals a glance at his friend and feels his heart burst with love at her misty eyes. 

“I’m happy for you Kanaya. Truly.  _ And  _ I promise to not intrude on your newlywed days,” he pretends to be dramatically dejected and it makes Kanaya laugh.

“How are you going to propose? And why this weekend? With your ex there?”

Kanaya wipes a runway tear with the tip of her finger, “I would hardly call Vriska an ex.”

“Uh-huh, but she is. Does Rose know?”

“Does Dave know about Jade?”

Karkat rolls his eyes, “That’s different. I’m not dating or thinking about proposing to Dave.”

“Right,” Kanaya looks down at her nails with an arched brow, “How do you feel about Dave?”

Karkat’s grip on the steering wheel gets tighter and against his will, he inhales deeply. “What is there to say? He’s a prick, he annoys the fuck out of me. I wish I could punch his glasses in. I will be happy not to see him once the station shuts down,” he tries not to notice how heavy the lie feels on his tongue. 

“I think he is rather sweet. He is always looking out for you. He seems to care a great deal about you.”

“Right. And I  _ love  _ to go on early morning runs, in the winter.”

Kanaya flicks Karant’s ear and he flinches, “Who made sure you didn’t run out into the streets and die drunk and run over when we went to the executive dinner? Who makes sure you take your lunch breaks and that you go home at a reasonable hour? Oftentimes staying past his own contract hours, I might add. Who carried you to the car when you were practically unconscious due to exhaustion? And then went to check on you?”

Karkat tilts his head, “He never made it to check on me, remember?”

“Oh, that’s right,” She taps her chin with her finger. “Regardless, Dave has always been kind and concerned with your wellbeing, so you don’t have to pretend you won’t miss him once we’re not all working together.”

“He’s a pain in my ass,” Karkat mumbles as he turns into the dirt path towards the house. 

Kanaya lets out a frustrated huff but drops the subject. She doesn’t point out that she’s noticed that both men spend about the same amount of time with each other as she and Rose do. Or that she knows Karkat sometimes watches Dave’s videos or newsreels more than the rest. 

Karkat pulls up to the large house. He sees Sollux’s and Vriska’s car already parked in the driveway. He holds Kanaya back before she gets out of the car.

“Let me know if you need any help with your proposal?”

She smirks, “Karkat, I’ve been listening to your rants about romance for the better part of my life. I think I’ve got it covered,” she pauses, “But if anything comes up I’ll find you, okay?”

Karkat nods seriously and lets her go. 

The inside of the house is large with tall ceilings. It gives Karkat some cabin vibes despite the exterior not looking anything like the sort. Nepeta is the one that greets them when they make their way to the top of the stairs. 

“We already split up the rooms!” She motions for them to follow her down the hall.

“Kanaya, we assumed you’d share with Rose. Karkat, you’re sharing with John and Dave.”

Karkat swallows and reminds himself that sharing a room with Dave doesn’t mean anything. He’s fallen asleep in front of him before, and they won’t be alone--John is a good buffer. 

She beams, “We’re making drinks downstairs if you wanna join after you get settled in.”

“Thanks, Nep. I’ll head down in a bit.”

Kanaya agrees and Nepeta gives them two thumbs up before bouncing away. 

Karkat walks into the bedroom and finds that it is empty and looks untouched. He sighs at the fact that he gets to pick his bed and elects the one closest to the window. There are only two beds in the room but he assumes that John and Dave will share a bed. 

He drops his bag at the foot of the bed and falls face down on top of the covers. It is a soft mattress and Karkat feels himself pleasantly sink into it. He begins to drift into sleep when the door slams open.

“Karkat!” John yells and throws himself on top of his friend.

“Egbert, get the fuck off of me!” Karkat’s surprised screech is muffled, his arms and legs are flailing about.

“We’re finally gonna share a bed. Not romantically of course. But--”

Dave sits on the edge of the other bed and watches as Karkat finds new strength to push and flip John off the bed.

“Oh my fucking god, John. That was literal years ago! Don’t make this weird, you shit face!”

“What was years ago?” Dave asks.

John lets out a laugh at the same time Karkat roars.

“Nothing!”

“Karkat asked me out once when we were both drunk at a networking event before we both got hired at the station,” John is laughing so hard he’s doubled over.

Dave looks over at Karkat who has his face buried into a pillow, hiding his embarrassed face.

“Actually, Dave, I think you were at that event too. Rose and I dragged you to it for free food. You could’ve met years ago! Wild,” he lets out a drawn-out sigh and climbs back on top of the bed.

“I’m going the fuck home. See you later, losers,” Karkat tries to get out of the bed but John pushes him back down.

“I’m joking, I’m joking! I was very flattered. If I were gay I would totally go out with your shouty ass,”

Dave chews on his lip and lets the twinge of jealousy roll over him. It quickly dissipates when he notices how flustered and cute Karkat looks. He won’t hold it against Karkat to have had a crush on John in the past.

Karkat is bright red and his cheeks are puffed up in anger. He takes the pillow and starts to hit John with it.

“Strider. Come. Take. Your. Dumb. Ass. Friend. He. Is. Not. Sleeping. On . My. Bed.”

Dave puts his hands up and shakes his head, “Hell no, I’ve shared a bed with John before. He’s a violent kicker. I’m pretty sure I still have the bruises I got from the last time we shared a bed when we were in college.”

John pulls the pillow away from Karkat, “Oh, so you’ll share with Karkat? That works for me!”

Karkat’s eyes grow wide as he pulls the pillow back and tries to smother John.

Dave’s cheeks are turning pink and behind his shades, his eyes are equally wide. 

“Here, let me help you,” he tells Karkat and moves to pin John down on the bed.

John keeps laughing and gasping for air, “I give, I give!” he shrieks.

“Shut the fuck up! You’re so goddamn loud!” Vriska shouts before stepping into the room to close the door.

The sound of the door slamming close shakes the three men and John takes the opportunity to escape. He flips Karkat and Dave off before running out of the room. 

Karkat watches Dave chase after his friend, leaving him alone in the room again. He lets out a sigh of relief. 

**\---**

Karkat has never been into nature and outdoorsy things. He prefers to spend his time indoors where it is insect-free, but he would be remiss if he didn’t at least appreciate how peaceful and clean it felt to walk amongst the trees. 

He takes the time alone as an opportunity to explore and sneaks out through the front door to walk around the grounds. He can hear the sound of laughter and cheering coming from inside the house. Karkat thinks about going to meet them inside but chooses to soak in the last few moments of peace. 

It is short-lived because John and Jade find him in no time. 

“We’ve got booze! On company dime!” John screams. 

The birds that were quietly living their lives fly away and Karkat throws back a middle finger for John and Jade. 

It turns out that they brought a lot of alcohol. It’s probably more than they need for the weekend but he doesn’t doubt that by the end of the weekend it will be gone. Karkat makes a mental promise to not get shit faced because at some point during the soiree he is going to need to do actual work.

“Oh damn, this is that kind of party.” Sollux picks up a few bottles and assesses their expensive labels. 

Aradia grins, “And we also have lots of this!” She drops a bag of weed and a couple of glass pipes on the table. 

There’s a few cheers and whistles that go around the room. Karkat’s jaw drops and without meaning to he looks over to Dave who looks just as surprised. They briefly lock eyes and when Karkat mouths  _ what the fuck _ at him, he chuckles. 

Karkat scowls and watches Aradia grab some weed and a pipe. Nepeta is with John making some drinks in the kitchen. He follows their laughter and when he steps into the room Nepeta greets him with a mixed drink.

“You still like the sweeter stuff, right?” She smiles.

“Thanks, go easy alright? No vomiting, Egbert! I’m not taking care of you.” 

John laughs his goofy laugh and flips him off, ”No promises!”

Karkat takes a sip of the drink and groans. It’s fruity and cold--two things he enjoys in a drink.

When he turns around Dave is standing by the entrance to the kitchen staring. His cheeks are a little pink.  _ That’s cute,  _ Karkat thinks.

“What! Are you already fucking high?” Karkat growls at Dave.

“What? No. I wasn’t planning on getting high. Are you gonna smoke? I didn’t know you smoked. Though, you’re so high strung maybe it would be a good experience for you? Maybe you would have, like, a spiritual awakening or some shit.” 

Karkat rolls his eyes and continues to sip his drink. 

Nepeta reaches for Dave’s sleeve and tugs him closer to the bottles of multicolored alcohol. 

Karkat watches as he drinks and has a brief memory of Dave hunched over on the ground with his face between his knees, flashes through Karkat’s mind. He hasn’t had an opportunity to ask him about it, and he’s not sure if he should. But Kanaya was right, Dave always made it a point to make sure Karkat was okay, and reciprocating care was the least Karkat could do.

“What do you like to drink?” Nepeta motions towards the array of bottles.

John pushes Karkat out of his way and settles on the table with some limes and a knife, “Dave doesn’t really drink.” 

“I sometimes drink, Egbert. On special occasions. I am just not a big fan of the taste. How can you not think it tastes like rubbing alcohol?” 

Karkat nods and John shrugs.

John slices some limes, “Then, you should try Karkat’s drink. I’m pretty sure it’s got so much stuff in it that it hardly tastes like vodka.”

Nepeta nods enthusiastically, “Oh, you should definitely try Karkat’s drink if you’re not a fan of the liquor taste.”

Dave looks between all three of them, unsure as to how to respond to the offer. 

“Here, try it,” Karkat offers his glass to Dave. 

He doesn’t take it immediately but after overcoming his hesitation, Dave takes the drink and brings it up to his mouth.

John, Nepeta, and Karkat watch him expectantly.

Dave grimaces and coughs as he hands back the drink.

“This tastes like shit. What the actual fuck, Karkat.”

Nepeta and John laugh at Dave, “Yeah, Karkat is really into sweet drinks. I’m pretty sure he is more likely to get a sugar high than drunk.”

Karkat hisses but takes the glass and chugs what’s left. 

“Fuck all of you, I have impeccable taste!”

Dave laughs at Karkat’s offense and the sound brings Karkat relief in a way he wasn’t expecting.

  
  


**\---**

Everyone is gathered outside of the house. Aradia, Jade, and Sollux are laying in the grass passing a joint back and forth between them. Feferi says something to them as she plops down beside them and they all burst into laughter. 

John, Terezi, Nepeta, Vriska, and Kanaya are playing a card game that has John and Vriska screaming at each other. 

Dave, Rose, and Karkat are watching everything unfold from the lawn chairs on the other side of the porch. 

“That’s against the rules, Serket!” John yells.

“Is it? Make the call Terezi. Am I going against the rules of the game?”

Whatever Terezi responds makes Vriska cackle and John scream again. 

Rose sighs, “I’m going to go make sure they don’t kill each other,” She pats Karkat’s cheek and kisses Dave on top of his head as she walks away.

Dave and Karkat are left to sit together. It has been easy to talk with Rose as a buffer, but now that they’re alone, even if they’re not really alone, it makes Dave’s heart race. 

Karkat’s cheeks are pink from the alcohol that is making its course through his bloodstream. He keeps running a hand through his hair, something that Dave has noticed is a nervous habit for Karkat. He keeps looking at Dave and opening his mouth as if to speak but keeps closing it after a moment and then running his hand through his hair. He does it enough that Dave starts to get more anxious. Dave wants to reach over and stop Karkat’s hand,  _ And then I could just-- _

Dave ignores the twitching of his fingers at the ghost sensation of having had his fingers in Karkat’s hair only days prior.

“I’m gonna roll up a joint,” Dave mumbles before walking up and towards where Jade and company are sitting. 

Karkat watches Dave ask for some weed and then how everybody’s faces light up in misguided pride. It looks like Sollux invites Dave to sit and join them but Dave says something and then points in Karkat’s direction with his head. Feferi and Aradia coo and poke at Dave’s legs until they seem to notice Jade looking away. 

Dave makes his way back next to Karkat. He places the materials on the table and then picks up what’s left of his drink and downs the rest. 

“Have you ever rolled a joint before?” Karkat is looking at Dave with surprise. 

“Dude, I spent most of my undergrad high as fuck. I could probably roll a joint with my eyes closed. Actually, I’m pretty sure I’ve done that. I used to have a collection of pipes and bongs. I kind of stopped doing weed about a year before you hired me as an intern. Rose isn’t a fan of the smell. But now and then John and I will share a bowl.” 

Karkat watches Dave’s slender fingers work with the paper. His inhibitions lowered, Karkat stares unabashedly and bites the inside of his cheeks. His fingers expertly move and in no time Dave presents Karkat with a neat little white cigarette looking thing. 

Dave lights one end of the joint and then brings it up to his mouth, “It helped out with my anxiety.”

At the sight of Dave taking a long draw from the joint, holding it, and then to Karkat’s detriment, Dave throwing his head back to expose his neck and elegantly releasing the smoke through his lips-- Karkat feels like the alcohol in his body catches fire and the flames go straight to his dick.

“Do you want to take a hit?” Dave offers.

Karkat licks his lips, “I’ve never smoked. Anything. Ever.” he admits.

Dave smiles playfully and Karkat’s body aches-- it’s been a while since Dave has directed that expression at Karkat. It’s an expression Karkat has reserved for his nighttime fantasies.

“It might do you good? It could help you relax, maybe. But no pressure, man.” 

Karkat’s pupils dilate and he leans in to take the lit joint from Dave’s hand. It almost looks like Karkat is crouching down to hide from the rest of the group. Which considering how much the crew enjoys teasing him, makes sense to Dave that he wouldn’t want to be seen taking his first puff.

Dave watches, wide-eyed with amusement, as Karkat brings it up to his lips. Karkat is looking up at Dave as if he is going to find instructions or an answer on his face. Their eyes are locked while Karkat inhales, the embers of the tip burning brighter. Dave can’t help but think that the moment feels oddly intimate and sensual. 

He squirms in his seat and doesn’t look away from Karkat.

Karkat’s face twists in pain as he starts to cough and choke. He sits back in his chair and continues to cough and pound on his chest with a fist.

Dave takes the joint and leans over to pat Karkat in the back but Karkat pulls away to flail and flip him off.

Dave shakes his head, “Don’t inhale too deeply. Like this,” He breathes in and makes sure that Karkat is watching him.

Karkat nods and clears his throat. He takes the joint when Dave offers it to him again. He still chokes a little, but as they pass it back and forth Karkat begins to get the hang of it.

Karkat does feel a little more relaxed and he can tell that Dave does too. He’s been talking Karkat’s ear off about music and movies for a while now. Soft smiles alternating with intense expressions as he argues about the merits of artists and genres.

At one point Rose and Kanaya stop by to check on them with food before disappearing into the house. 

Karkat looks around and realizes that the group has scattered and are no longer sitting outside. It feels like minutes have passed but when Karkat glances at his watch he sees that it’s hours into the evening.

“I want a blanket!” Karkat yells as they walk away. Rose sticks her tongue out at Karkat which gets her Karkat’s middle finger. 

Neither of them returns with a blanket but Vriska does run out with one and a water bottle. 

“Here,” she says, handing Dave the water and Karkat the blanket. “We’re beating John’s ass while playing the price is right if you want to join.”

Karkat extends the blanket over himself, “Playing? Do you mean watching?”

Vriska ruffles his hair, “No, dumbass. I mean playing. While we watch. The guy does not know the price of anything.”

She leaves without actually waiting for a response and leaves Dave and Karkat alone again. 

He does it without thinking, but Karkat gets up and drags his chair closer to Dave so that he can share his blanket. The effects of the weed still have Karkat feeling relaxed and he’s glad that he gave it a shot even if he thought he was going to choke to death at first.

  
  


Karkat’s filter is gone so he asks the question that has been on his mind all week, “Are you okay? Is everything okay?”

Dave takes a sip of the water, “Yeah, I’m great. I’m feeling fantastic, actually.”

Karkat furrows his eyebrows and takes the glass from Dave’s hand and takes a drink himself. 

“No doofus, I mean. Ugh, okay Kanaya won’t say anything but I saw you freak out last week outside of the house. And I know it’s none of my business, Kanaya already lectured me about that, but I know what it’s like to kind of fall apart like that after a break-up and it can spiral easily. When you told me that you weren’t coming in for a week, I got worried.” Karkat’s voice is quiet.

Dave briefly pushes his glasses up and rubs his eyes with the palms of his hands. He figured that Karkat had probably seen some of his anxiety attack, and there is no way he would have missed seeing Dave’s car in the driveway. 

“Kanaya is right, it isn’t any of your business. I also really would rather we not talk about it. Plus, you don’t really have anything to worry about. I’m not about to just throw away my accidental career out the window just because Jade and I broke up,”

“Good.”

“And honestly, man, I’m not that heartbroken. I think I knew it was coming. Well, I mean I knew that we had to end things. For the sake of friendship.”

“Okay, okay. I’m glad.” Karkat huffs.

Dave tilts his head, “You’re glad we had to break up?”

“No, fuckass, I’m glad that you’re not heartbroken about it. Despite how much of a pain in the ass you are, if you quit before we shut down it would be a shit tonne of more work for me. And I would rather you not make my life any more difficult than it already is.”

Dave frowns ever so slightly, his emotions feel heightened and raw under inebriation, “Sorry, wouldn’t want to add any more to your fucking plate with my emotional baggage,” He doesn’t mean for it to come out so bitter. Having heard about Karkat’s past crushes and impactful relationships has Dave feeling on edge. The tone is not lost on Karkat.

“Hey, what the fuck! You said you were fine.”

“I am!” 

“Then what’s the fucking problem? Why did you get all pissy?”

“People who aren’t Karkat Vantas are allowed to be prissy, too.”

Karkat scoffs, “I am prissy with reasons to be!”

Karkat tugs on the blanket and pulls it away from Dave. The sudden lack of cover makes Dave shiver. 

“Well, maybe I have a reason, too? Maybe you’d realize that if you ever got your head out of your ass enough to stop being a selfish prick and think about me for once, huh?” Dave pulls the blanket back. He does it with a force that Karkat isn’t expecting and the shorter man gets pulled out of his chair with the motion.

Karkat looks up and growls at Dave. Dave is frowning but he doesn’t look the slightest bit embarrassed at his own words. And Karkat tells himself that he shouldn’t be either. Dave is speaking out of his ass, he doesn’t know that Karkat spends way too much time thinking about Dave. Enough that he has to consciously stop himself from getting carried away with his fantasies about his co-worker. 

“Why would I ever waste my time thinking about your sorry ass?” Karkat spits back. 

This makes whatever annoyance Dave was feeling stir once more. Dave starts to stand up, he’s tired and high and this new anxious feeling is making him nauseous. 

Karkat pushes Dave’s knees back so that he has to sit down again.

“I was worried about you, dumbass.” Karkat lifts himself and slides back into his chair. He gently redistributes the blanket again so that they are both under it. 

  
  


Karkat takes the opportunity to finish off his drink and promises that it is his last so that he can’t let any more awkward truths be revealed. The liquid is no longer cold and the liquor that has settled at the bottom makes Karkat heave a little. He sets the glass back down before he pulls the blanket up to his chin with a pout. He pivots so he can rest his head on Dave’s shoulder. It’s not a natural move, not under any other circumstance, but right now, with THC and alcohol in his system, it just feels right. 

Dave tells himself to move away, to push Karkat away so that neither of them can construe this small action into anything it is not. But Dave doesn’t move. He doesn’t want to move. He lets Karkat rest his head on him. He listens to Karkat’s breathing as it finds its rhythm and tries to match his own to it. He’s eyelids feel heavier with each breath.

Dave brings his arms under the blanket and lets his arm fall on the armrest. He can feel the heat of Karkat’s hand next to him and as his head falls on top of Karkats and into sleep. He imagines that he dares to reach over and hold Karkat’s hand in his own, as he finally gives into slumber.

**\---**

Karkat wakes up with a jolt. He sits up and unwraps his arms from where his own has twisted around Dave. 

Dave’s head is hanging back in what looks like the most uncomfortable stretch. They’re both under the large blanket where they fell asleep outside on the patio. Dave’s glasses are a little crooked and Karkat can see long blond lashes pressing against his face. Karkat’s face starts to blush. He has been curious about Dave’s eyes for so long, fantasizing about what they look like behind the glasses. Even if they’re not open, he can’t help but think that Dave looks beautiful without obstruction.

Karkat’s mouth feels parched and his mind is groggy. He’s never gotten high before but he might do it again if it means getting to sleep so profoundly. He looks around for the water bottle and scowls when he finds it’s empty. 

Next to him, Dave wakes up with a sudden snort. He winces at the pain in his neck as he sits up with a loud yawn.

“Man, how long were we out?”

Karkat takes out his phone. There are a few unread messages from Rose and Vriska.

“We were asleep for an hour or so. Maybe two?” Karkat clicks on the messages from Rose first. 

The sound that comes out of Karkat resembles an injured bird and it catches Dave by surprise. 

He quickly scrolls through her messages and then switches over to Vriska’s messages. 

At the very least, the pictures Rose took were tasteful. Vriska, not so much. 

“What’re you looking at?” Dave leans in to look over Karkat’s shoulder.

“Nothing!” 

“Yes you are, you’re all red. What is it?”

“It’s nothing! Just Vriska and your sister being creeps. I’m going to bed now.”

Karkat shuts off his phone and crams it back into his pocket. He throws the blanket off of himself and lets it drape over Dave who is watching him with an annoyed look as Karkat dashes to the door.

**\---**

Karkat is short of breath by the time he gets up the stairs. There’s music coming from almost all of the bedrooms and he can see light seeping out into the hallway. No one seems to be sleeping but everyone has also retired to their rooms. 

The door to his shared room is closed and there’s no light coming out from underneath. Karkat knocks and waits for a response.

No one answers and Karkat starts to turn the knob as quietly as he can. He’s a big proponent of not interrupting people’s sleep and if John has turned in for the night, it could be dangerous to wake him up. 

Karkat slips into the room and lets his eyes adjust to the room. The light coming in from the window makes it brighter than the hallway. 

It’s empty.

Karkat stomps over to the lamp on the nightstand that is between the two beds and angrily turns it on. 

He throws himself on his designated bed and buries his face in the pillow and groans. He can’t believe he practically threw himself at Dave that afternoon. He also can’t believe he slept through most of what was supposed to be a cathartic team building day. 

“I’m a terrible leader,” he whispers and reaches into his pants for his phone. 

When he opens it, the first thing he sees is one of the pictures Rose sent of Karkat and Dave leaning on each other with their arms twisted together. Dave’s hand is over his and his head is resting on Karkat's own. Dave’s glasses have slid to the tip of his nose and his mouth is slightly parted. He looks so peaceful and so does Karkat sleeping next to him. 

If he didn’t know better he’d say that it was a cute picture of a cute couple sleeping.

Karkat is consumed by the image, allowing himself to think about what it’s going to be like to no longer see Dave on the regular, that he doesn’t notice Dave quietly creeping towards him. 

“What are you looking at?”

Karkat screams in surprise and his phone goes flying off the bed.

Dave is fast and picks it up. He blinks at the screen, a series of thoughts running through his mind. The first is a familiar mix of shame and anger at having been caught in a vulnerable position--especially when he knows that Rose knows that Dave is figuring out his feelings about Karkat. The second is a giddy nervousness resembling that of a schoolboy who finally got to hold hands with his longtime crush. The third is a resolve that he finds as his gaze moves from the photo to Karkat who is rolling on the bed smothering his face in a pillow-- a resolve to stop being afraid.

His fingers still tremble as he clicks on the photo and forwards it to himself. 

“Here, scoot over,” Dave drops the phone on Karkat’s stomach and waits for him to move to the side.

Dave lays back on the bed next to Karkat. He folds and rests his hands over his stomach and stays stock still while he stares up at the ceiling. His heart is pounding and feels like he’s on the edge of something again. Dave remembers Kanaya’s calm breathing and tries to replicate the process without making it obvious to Karkat that he’s about to panic. 

They are both flat on their back, their legs slightly touching, and listening to the muffled mixture of beats and melodies coming through the walls.

“Um, you know there’s a whole ass other bed over there,” Karkat says after a moment.

“I’ll go if you promise not to let me share a bed with John.” 

“It can’t be that fucking bad.” 

“He’s bit me and kicked me in the balls in his sleep, man. The guy does not hold back his strength in his sleep.”

Karkat sighs and scoots further to the other side to give Dave some more space. Karkat knows himself well enough to know that he might get carried away being so close to Dave and under the influence. Not that he would ever do anything to Dave, but his imagination could run wild and if he gets an erection while in bed next to Dave, Karkat might as well throw himself out the window.

“So,” Karkat clears his throat, “What do you think you’ll do once the station closes?” 

Work is a safe topic. It’s difficult to get hard when thinking about work.

Dave lets out a sigh, “I feel kind of bad because I know that for everyone else, this has been their career, their thing, for years. And I just came on to the team recently. The internship was always kind of a temporary thing for me. Mostly an excuse to leave my--” Dave chokes on the word dad. 

Karkat turns to his side so he can look at Dave while he speaks. He thinks he can barely get a glimpse of Dave’s eyes from this angle. 

Dave matches his motion and Karkat is stuck staring at his own reflection again. 

They’re only inches apart, and even though they’re on top of the covers, they feel warm in their shared proximity. 

“I had no idea what to do after college and I ended up back home with my dad. After a while it was getting to be too much, y’know? Shit, families can be complicated. And I’m not sure what would have happened if I just stayed there, living with him and doing odd jobs,” Dave shudders.

Karkat nods and waits for Dave to continue.

Dave takes a deep breath, “So when Rose, my fucking nosy-but-caring sister was like, ‘hey bro, my dope ass boss is looking for a station intern you should apply--”

Karkat blushes and rolls his eyes, “She would never say any of those words.”

Dave smiles, “True, but you know what I mean. When she made me apply and then you reluctantly let me be a minimum wage intern, I had no idea I’d end up with a real job! Talking about movies and shit.”

Karkat flicks Dave on the forehead, “Dave, are you ever gonna answer the question?”

Dave frowns and rubs the spot Karkat hit, “I don’t know what I’m doing. Or what I’m supposed to do? I never have. I don’t know. Fuck, I don’t know. Karkat what am I going to do? Go back to Houston? Move back in with my dad? Oh god--” his breath pitches higher.

Karkat places a hand on Dave’s bicep and gives it a little squeeze. The sensation shocks Dave back into calm. 

“Hey, it’s okay. You won’t have to move back in with your dad if you don’t want to. There’s still a few months to figure out what you want to do.”

Dave lets out a small breath, “Yeah. You’re right. What about you? What do you want to do?” 

“I’m not really sure either. I guess I’ll need to look at other networks and send out a portfolio. That would be the most sensible thing to do,” Karkat pulls his hand away from Dave. “But if I’m being honest, I’d want to look back into directing and producing films. That’s what I’ve wanted to do since I was a kid. News production was also supposed to be a stepping stone for me. I had a ten-year plan and ‘news producer’ was only supposed to be a year-long thing.” 

“Hey, maybe this is the time to take that leap. Follow your dreams and shit. I think that’s what I would do if I had a dream.”

Karkat looks up at Dave with a tender smile. 

“You won’t have to deal with my sorry ass anymore,” Dave teases.

Karkat growls and headbutts Dave’s chest gently. Karkat is now in the perfect position to be held. Dave could easily reach over and wrap his arms around Karkat.

“I have to get ready for bed,” Dave rolls out of bed and reaches for his bag.

Karkat watches him move, his expression stunned and his body shivering at the sudden lack of Dave’s heat. 

Dave goes into the bedroom bathroom and closes the door behind him. Karkat takes the quiet moment to change into his own pajamas, shorts, and an old t-shirt and shuffles to the bathroom down the hall to brush his teeth.

When he comes back into the room, Dave is still in the bathroom, and he can hear the shower running. 

Karkat slips under the covers of the bed and moves as close to the edge as possible. He considers placing a pillow down the middle but decides against it. 

“If Dave wants to share my bed, that I called first, then he can deal,” he grumbles. 

Dave steps out of the bathroom wearing sweatpants and a white undershirt. Karkat might think he looks like a Calvin Klein model but his eyes are glued to Dave’s bare face.

The shades are gone. 

Dave stares back at Karkat, confusion evident in his red irises. He stares at Karkat's awestruck face for a moment, a beat too long to be called brief-- before his eyes go wide with realization. 

He spins back into the bathroom and picks up his shades. 

Dave steps back into the room, his eyes hidden and fixed on the floor as he sits on the edge of the empty bed. 

Karkat sits up.

“Is that why you’re always wearing shades?” His voice is incredulous. 

“It cuts back on the demon eye comments,” Dave mumbles under his breath. Bright and unnatural eye colors run in his family. His being red and the most striking has always been the source of teasing and bullying for Dave. His own father hated seeing Dave’s red eyes.

“Whoever is saying that shit has got it wrong. Dave, you’re eyes are the coolest and kind of the most beautiful thing I have ever fucking seen with my boring ass brown eyes,” Karkat lets himself be honest.

Dave looks up to see Karkat’s stern genuine expression. They both have a slight blush on their cheeks. A thought about Karkat’s eyes being even more beautiful gets stuck in Dave’s throat. 

“You weren’t planning on sleeping with your shades on, right?” Karkat asks, laying back down and making a show of scooting to the side. 

Dave takes the invitation and slides under the covers next to Karkat. 

“I was going to take them off once I knew you were asleep,” He admits.

Karkat lets out a short growl, “Well, don’t feel like you have to wait on my account.”

“They don’t freak you out?”

“Uh, no? Why would they? They’re fucking beautiful.”

“What?”

“Oh my fucking god, Dave, don’t overthink it. Your eyes are stunning. Now take off your shades and turn off the light. I think I’m still high because I’m tired as fuck.”

Dave draws in a shaky breath but does as he’s told. He locks eyes with Karkat for a quick moment, before turning the light off and settling back on the bed. 

Once again they are both laying stock still and staring up at the dark ceiling. The soft moonlight from the window casts a blue glow over them. 

Karkat feels warmth spread from his chest, a sort of elation, at the thought that he not only was just privy to what is obviously a very private aspect of Dave’s life-- but that Dave’s eyes were even better than whatever his boring imagination had conjured up.

Dave is feeling a similar warmth, an overwhelming sense of relief washing over him. Karkat had seen his eyes, and instead of running or disgusted shock, he called them beautiful. He blinks to hold back the tears welling up in his eyes.

True to his word, Karkat is beginning to drift into sleep and Dave’s body releases tension as he starts to match Karkat’s breathing. 

They’re almost asleep when a sudden banging on the wall startles them awake. 

Karkat clutches Dave’s arm when the loud thumping picks up again, only this time it sounds like it’s coming from two different directions. 

“What the fu--”

Dave is interrupted by a loud moan.

“Oh god, oh god no,” Karkat grabs a pillow to cover his ears with. 

Dave rushes to get the light, nearly falling out of the bed, and looks for his phone.

“Put some music on!” Karkat hisses.

“I’m trying!” Dave hisses back.

Dave clicks on a random instrumental playlist and turns the volume up enough to drown and distract from other sounds. He places the phone on the nightstand and turns off the light before crawling back under the covers.

This time he doesn’t shy away from being close to Karkat. 

“Who do you think that was?” Dave whispers in the dark.

“Don’t think about it,” Karkat yawns and pokes Dave’s foot with his own. The gesture feels comfortable and casual. 

They fall back asleep with the lull of an instrumental pop cover and the muffled moans of their friends in the background.

**\---**

Dave wakes up first. His eyes flutter open lazily as they adjust to the sunlight coming in from the window. 

He instinctively reaches for his shades but realizes that he can’t move. Dave is pinned down to the bed by Karkat’s body. Karkat’s head is resting on Dave’s shoulder, hot breath brushing up against his neck. Karkat has a leg draped over Dave’s body. Dave’s arm is wrapped under and around Karkat and he thinks he has probably been holding him close throughout the night. 

Dave’s body immediately tenses and the sudden shift starts to stir Karkat awake.

“Wha?” Karkat tilts his head up drowsily.

He meets Dave’s panicked red eyes and blinks. 

Karkat must still be dreaming. This isn’t an unusual dream of his. He’s thought about waking up in Dave’s arms many times before. Only this time it all feels a lot more realistic because now he knows that Dave’s eyes are a beautiful candy red.

In Karkat’s sleepy dreams, he always wakes up to a kiss from Dave so he doesn’t hesitate to bring up his hand to cup Dave’s cheek. 

Dave sees it happening, he feels like his ghost has left his body and now he is witnessing how sleepy, probably still asleep, Karkat pulls Dave’s face closer to his own. Dave doesn’t resist Karkat's touch and despite how painfully hard his heart is pounding, he lets his eyes close and leans into Karkat’s kiss.

The electricity that runs through Dave’s body both kills him and revives him. When Karkat pulls back from the kiss, Dave finds himself torn, suddenly craving more of Karkat in a way he hasn't wanted anyone in a long time. 

Karkat, still sleeping, babbles something before unwrapping himself from Dave and small little snores accompany his breathing. 

Dave takes a shaky breath and doesn't move, staring at the now-familiar ceiling. His body is buzzing with energy. His first kiss with a man. That man is Karkat, whom Dave can’t deny his crush for. But Karkat was obviously asleep.

He wonders if this is what Jade had meant when she said she couldn’t feel his spark. He had never felt this alive or giddy when they had kissed. 

The sound of the door creaking open breaks Dave from his thoughts. 

John slips in, tiptoeing and closing the door behind him. Dave had been so caught up that he hadn’t noticed that the second bed was completely untouched.

John winces when he hears Dave grab his shades and sit up. His dark hair is wild and ruffled, almost to the point it could rival Karkat’s bedhead. He’s wearing one of Terezi’s t-shirts and Dave can see a line of bite marks and hickeys around his collar.

“Umm,” John blushes.

Dave smirks, “Good morning, Egbert.”

“I can explain!”

It’s Dave’s laughter that finally wakes Karkat up. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted them to kiss so bad!!! and even though Karkat is not necessarily aware of it...it counts! Also, I've been trying to find the way for Karkat to finally see Dave's eyes forever, so I feel at peace now that he has finally seen them.
> 
> Thank you again for reading! 
> 
> I have chapter 8 drafted out and I am working on getting the boys into some more intimate situations... 
> 
> Or is it too soon? 
> 
> Let me know! 
> 
> 💗💕


	8. two weeks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Karkat gets an unexpected offer from Eridan.
> 
> Dave is forced to confront his hypothetical future via a telenovela clip. 
> 
> Boy Dave and Karkat cross the point of no return when it comes to their relationship.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What if I told you...this is not as long as chapter 7?

On the second day of the weekend, Karkat and the producers along with Nepet, spend most of the day working in the living room while the rest of the group play games outside. Most of the day is spent teasing John about his wild night with Vriska and Terezi-- and while they play it off, they all notice how the three of them seem to be unable to stop touching each other. 

Rose and Kanaya announce that they both proposed to each other earlier that morning.

Everyone cheered and congratulated them. Dave pulled each of them into a tight embrace. Karkat even cried a little.

All in all the weekend was full commotion which would have made it easy for Dave to avoid Karkat throughout the rest of the weekend, but that’s not what happens. 

During his work time breaks, Karkat always found Dave and would watch or join whatever activity he was doing. Sometimes, Dave would walk over and sit next to Karkat and scroll through his phone quietly, stealing quick glances of Karkat’s mouth, while the rest of the producers gave each other knowing looks. 

They shared the bed one more night, their process was less dramatic and not as emotionally awkward. Instead, both Karkat and Dave fell into a comfortable rhythm. They watched youtube videos until they fell asleep. Neither of them mentioned the untouched second bed, both telling themselves that it was John’s in case he decided to come back in the middle of the night. 

And while there was no second kiss for Dave-- nor a first for Karkat--, neither of them made a fuss when they woke up with their limbs tangled together the next morning.

It made sleeping in their separate homes in their respective beds all the lonelier. 

**\---**

“That’s your fourth glass of apple juice,” Karkat points at Dave with his fork. 

“Hey, I don’t police your unhealthy caffeine habits.”

“Yes you do, you asswipe. You literally hid all of the coffee grounds in the office yesterday. I had to drink tea!”

Dave snickers, more expressive than he has been before. In the last two weeks since their so-called work retreat, Dave has been transforming before Karkat’s eyes. Allowing himself to share a little bit more of his authentic self with the producer. 

Dave pushes his glasses up for a moment to rub his eyes. Karkat pauses and watches him do it. Dave catches his gaze and gives him a shy smile, but he doesn’t look away or drop his glasses back down in a rush.

Karkat would be lying if he didn’t admit that his crush was quickly turning into something bigger. His fantasies were no longer tied up in sexual nature but instead, Karkat was finding himself thinking about doing the most mundane tasks together.

He has shared this with Kanaya, who has patiently listened, the supportive friend that she is. 

_ “Have you thought about asking him out on a date?” She offered. _

_ “No! I mean yes, I think about that a lot. But I don’t think he’s interested in me that way, Or any men. John’s made some comments about Dave being one of his only hetero-bros.” _

_ “Hmm, I try to take most of what John says with a grain of salt.” _

Karkat, fearing rejection again, and knowing that their time together is now limited, has made peace with this new friendship.

Dave reaches over and stabs a piece of Karkat’s chicken with his fork.

“Dave, have you started looking into jobs?”

Dave leans back on the park bench and finishes chewing.

“Kind of. I’m not sure where to look though,” He doesn’t add that he has been running into the issue of stubbornly wanting to work near Karkat. 

Dave watches Karkat chew on the plastic fork and subconsciously licks his own lips. Chasing the ghost of what Karkat’s kiss felt like.

“Do you still want to do news?” Karkat’s voice snaps him to attention.

Dave steals some chicken again, “Maybe? Actually, my youtube has been really kicking off and I was toying with the idea of making that my full-time gig for a while?”

Karkat nods, he’s been following that trajectory and the quality of Dave’s videos are getting better with each post. His camera persona is infuriatingly charismatic and smug and Karkat is absolutely addicted to it. 

“I’ll make you a reel just in case.”

Dave smiles and shoulder bumps Karkat. 

**\---**

They’re making their way back to the building after lunch when Feferi waves them over from the entrance.

“What’s up?” Dave asks. 

Feferi looks between them and bites her lip before grabbing Karkat by the shoulders.

“Just a heads up, Eridan said he might stop by at some point this week. He didn’t say when just that he would. You know how he likes to do shit unannounced.”

Karkat groans and Dave’s body tenses. Premature jealousy bubbling in the pit of his stomach.

“Is he here to see you? Please say yes.”

Feferi gives Karkat a sheepish smile, “He didn’t say either. Probably, since it’s been a while since he went on a fit about our break-up but I wanted to give you a heads up since, um, you know, have had a couple of run-ins with him,” her eyes flicker to Dave.

Karkat grimaces, “Thanks for the heads up.”

She waves good-bye and Karkat follows Dave into the elevator. 

“There’s nothing there. Eridan and I aren’t a thing or whatever,” Karkat blurts when the doors close.

“I didn’t ask,” Dave’s voice is cold and calculated, reminiscent of Dave of almost a year ago. 

“Yeah, well I’m just saying. Don’t want you to get the wrong fucking idea,” Karkat frowns at his own need to explain himself. “I blocked him a while ago. Don’t need that toxic shit in my life,”

Dave doesn’t say anything for a moment.

“Is he  _ the  _ bad break-up?”

“What?”

“You said once, that you knew what it was like to spiral after a break-up. Was that about Eridan?”

The elevator pings announcing they’re arrival. Dave reaches over and hits the close button before the doors can open.

The high conversation over the retreat replays in Karkat’s head. Dave’s face is stoic and tense and Karkat can see his nervous reflection on the glasses. 

“I--mean, yes? I guess? But that’s not where I’m at anymore. The thing with Eridan was just messy and complicated. I’m the one that ended it because honestly, he has a talent for making me feel like trash. And at one point I became so fucking consumed with the idea that I really was kind of worthless. Oh god, he would cheat and say the worst things, he always made me feel like it was all my fucking fault. But I’m so goddamn stupid, I would go crawling back, every single time. If it weren’t for Kanaya and Rose actually, I’m pretty sure I would still be there. Your sister is gifted in ripping off the band-aid. She made me cry so fucking bad.” 

Karkat closes his eyes and feels a shiver run down his spine at the memory. 

He opens his eyes again when he feels Dave pull him into an embrace.

“You’re not worthless or trash. Maybe a little stupid, but in a grouchy endearing way that we all love,” warmth drips in his words and Karkat melts a little into his arms. “Don’t go back to him, okay? You deserve so much better.”

Karkat lets himself be held until Dave pulls back, his hand trailing down Karkat’s arm. Karkat’s fingers twitch, waiting for Dave’s hand to stay there so that their fingers can intertwine. He glowers in disappointment when it doesn’t happen. 

**\---**

“And we are off!” Karkat announces and the room settles into its chorus of exhausted relief. He tries not to think about how soon he won’t get to end each work night with his friends. 

Karkat doesn’t have time to announce any additional notes before he notices that Dave has moved in close and is holding on to the hem on the side of Karkat’s knitted sweater. 

Dave’s posture is alert and his face hasn’t moved out of his T.V. ready mask. 

Karkat looks up at Dave with concern, “Hey, are you Ok--”

“Karkat Vantas, tonight’s show was pretty decent, I’ll say. Your crew really carries it. 

Dave feels Karkat’s body stiffen in front of him, a low growl escaping through his lips. 

“Eridan, what the fuck are you doing here?” Karkat turns to face him with his arms crossed over his chest. 

Eridan grins and exposes his perfect white teeth. “I thought I’d come to pay you a visit. I heard about the exec’s call.”

“So you’re here to rub it in our faces? Get the fuck out,” 

Dave tugs Karkat back when he feels him moving towards Eridan. 

Eridan laughs and Dave’s eyes twitch behind his glasses.

“We need to talk. I’ll wait for you to finish up,” he winks at Karkat and waves at Dave before turning around and walking out of the studio.

“What’s Eridan doing here?” Rose emerges from behind Dave.

Her expression is cold, much like her brother’s. 

“He’s here to talk to Feferi.”

Dave rolls his eyes behind his shades and even though Karkat can’t see it, he feels it. 

“Then why does he want to talk to you?” Rose asks and Dave nods.

“How the fuck should I know? To make fun of me?” He doesn’t mean to sound so defensive but it is the way it comes across.

Rose brings her hands up her waist in a stance that reminds Karkat of Kanaya’s lecturing pose, “Well I don’t think that’s a good idea right now. You’re tired and it’s late. You should go home for the weekend.” 

Karkat glares back, “I’m capable of making my own damn choices. I am not a child.”

“Is that so?” Kanaya speaks from behind Karkat. The corners of Rose’s lips twitch as if she understands that she has now won the argument.

“I am!” Karkat throws his hands up. “I’m going to see what he wants and then I am going to go eat a million hot pockets until I fall asleep?” 

Kanaya grimaces at the image, Dave and Rose suspect it’s because she’s actually seen Karakat eat an obscene amount of hot pockets.

“Well, try not to take too long. Remember that I am your ride home tonight. We carpooled.”

Dave realizes he’s still holding on to Karkat’s sweater and lets him go when he catches Rose hiding a smirk behind her hand.

“Ah, fuck, that’s right,” Karkat grumbles as he runs off to finish packing up the studio for the night. 

Dave watches him go, the jealousy he’s calling concern swirls and skirmishes across his skin. His eyes follow Karkat’s movements, worried that if he looks away Karkat might disappear with Eridan.

  
  


“So you’re not coming over?” Rose lifts herself up by the tip of her toes and plants a kiss on Kanaya’s cheek.

“I can stop by after I make sure he’s home.”

“Or Dave could take him home?”

“That would be lovely, do you think Dave would mind?”

“I don’t think he would mind,” Rose grins and kisses her fiance again. 

“I’m standing right here, you know?” Dave still doesn’t take his eyes off of Karkat, even if his eye line wanders lower to where Karkat’s butt is raised as he digs around in a utility box.

Kanaya pulls away from Rose and drops a gentle hand on Dave’s shoulder.

“We meant only teasing, I am happy to take Karkat home,” She smiles softly at Dave.

“No! I’ve got it, really. Unless you don’t want to take Rose home?” He quips.

Kanaya chuckles, “I always want to take your sister home.”

Dave winces, “Okay, don’t say it like that. Gross.”

Kanaya and Rose laugh before Rose pulls Kanaya in for another peck on the cheek.

“I’ll go change so you two can get on your weekend plans.”

**\---**

“Took you long enough,” Eridan looks up from his phone. He’s leaning on a sleek black SUV. It’s probably the nicest car currently in town. 

“Spit whatever the fuck you’re here to say, so I can get the hell out of here,” Karkat growls.

Eridan smirks and steps closer towards Karkat who has made a point of standing a few feet away from him. 

Karkat glares and grounds his stance. Eridan’s smirk may have triggered some desire in him in the past, but Eridan’s cocky demeanor falls pale in comparison to some of the  _ Dave expressions _ Karkat has cataloged in his brain.

“You haven’t answered any of my messages.”

Karkat crosses his arms, “And you still can’t get a fucking clue, huh?”

Eridan scowls, “Do you have to be such a bitch when I come bearing gifts?”

Karkat lets his arms fall to his sides, “What are you talking about?”

Eridan takes the move as an invitation and closes the distance between them. He’s taller than Karkat like most people are, but unlike most people, Eridan knows what buttons to push to get the reaction he wants. 

He takes a gold decorated hand and gently tilts Karkat’s face up by the chin.

Karkat hisses at his touch and smacks Eridan’s hand away. Eridan’s eyes go wide in surprise and Karkat stumbles backward to put distance between them. 

Eridan smirks, he is fond of the chase when it comes to Karkat, it always leads to something particularly explosive. 

“Don’t fucking touch me. Say what you have to and leave me the hell alone,” Karkat’s voice is low and quiet. He’s itching to fidget with something, to give his anxious energy some sort of outlet. 

He can recognize the game Eridan is playing, they’ve played it before. But this time he has no intention of falling into old habits. 

“I’m actually here to offer you a job,” his words drip with arrogance.

“What?”

“I know the station is getting shut down and you’ll be out of a job soon. Lucky for you, my show is in need of a producer, so despite how ungrateful you have been,” he spits, “I thought I would offer you the position.”

Karkat blinks, his expression empty as he processes the offer. Eridan works for the national branch. Where they produce actual national network television. It would be the most natural step to take, one that would take years to achieve on his own but here was Eridan, with all his smugness, offering it to Karkat.

“What do you say, Vantas?” Eridan moves in to grab Karkat’s wrist.

“I- Are you fucking with me?” He pulls back.

Eridan smirks, “That can be arranged, it would be a bonus of working together again.”

Karkat scowls, “That’s not what I meant and you know it!”

Eridan opens his mouth to speak but closes it when he sees Dave approach them.

“What’s up?” Dave’s voice is stern and catches Karkat off-guard. 

Karkat turns around to face Dave, who instead of standing back a polite distance, steps right up to where Karkat is standing. Half a step back and Karkat would be pressing into his chest. 

Eridan brings his hand up and adjusts his glasses, eyes narrowed at Dave, “I am offering Karkat a very lucrative career move.”

Dave steps back and looks at Karkat, who seems to be lost in thought.

“Karkat, love, why don’t we go talk it over dinner?” Eridan is speaking to Karkat but his eyes are fixed on Dave, waiting for his reaction. 

Dave’s cool mask doesn’t falter but Eridan manages to catch how Dave’s hand flies to hold one of Karkat’s wrists. 

Karkat feels like someone just tossed cold water at his face. Dave’s grip on his wrist isn’t rough or aggressive, it feels gentle and pleading. 

“I’m not go-- I’ve got plans already. Kanaya is waiting for me.”

Dave lets out a massive mental sigh of relief. He draws a circle with his thumb where it connects with Karkat’s pulse and hopes that Karkat is getting his message of support. 

“Actually, It’s you and me, tonight,” he stares down Eridan behind his dark glasses. “I have no intention of walking in on my sister and her fiance,” he mumbles the last part to Karkat.

Dave directs his attention back to Eridan. “He’ll think about it and get back to you.”

Karkat doesn’t look back as Dave drags him to his car. Neither speaks until they are both seated inside and the doors close.

“What the fuck man? I can speak for myself!”

“You weren’t saying anything! You were going to go with him!”

Karkat scoffs at the offense and runs a hand through his hair, “No I fucking wasn’t!”

“Really? You weren’t thinking about getting in his car, getting dinner, and going back to his place, and--?” the jealousy in Dave starts to turn sharp. He shuts his eyes and balls his fists. His imagination starts to run wild with images of Eridan’s dick pics and the sounds he knows Karkat is capable of making. 

“You’re so infuriating!” Dave snaps.

“Me? Me! Me? I’m infuriating? You’re the goddamn king of infuriating! Do you think I’m that fucking weak? Give me some fucking credit, Strider! I had zero intention of following that jackass tonight,” Karkat expects the bitter taste of his own lie and is surprised when he can’t find it. 

A wheeze precedes his chuckle and Karkat leans back in the passenger seat. He closes his eyes and swallows, feeling parched all of a sudden. He reaches over and tugs on Dave’s black sleeve. 

“Thanks,” he croaks. “Honestly, if you hadn’t shown up, I don’t know if I would have given in or not. I’m glad I didn’t go. I’m tired of feeling like shit.”

Karkat brings his hand back and drags the fingers of his other hand gingerly across where Dave had rubbed the small circles. 

Silence settles around them.

They haven’t pulled out from the parking lot. They’re the last car in the dark parking lot. The yellow hue of the only light post illuminating the lot casts soft shadows inside the car. 

Dave speaks softly but it shatters the silence nonetheless, “I’m glad you didn’t go. I’d be really pissed if you left with him.” 

The sharpness becomes duller and with each breath, it becomes cold loneliness. He would be angry and hurt, but even more terrifyingly, he would feel so alone if Karkat had left him behind.

Karkat opens his eyes and emits a dramatic sigh, “I’m hungry. Take me to food.”

**\---**

They opt to pick up food from the same Thai place that is graciously open late into the night. The hostess sees them walk in and asks them if they want their regular before walking away without a response.

Karkat doesn’t ask Dave if he’s coming into the house, he lets him follow up the stairs and through the door. 

Dave settles into the living room while Karkat brings back some plates and drinks. Despite the fact that neither Kanaya nor Karkat drink juice, AJ never fails to be in their refrigerator.

“Do you want to watch whatever telenovela is on?” Dave grins.

“Oh, I’m sorry, did you forget neither of us knows Spanish?” 

“Hey, I took Spanish all the way through college,” Dave teases.

Karkat tries to roll his eyes but only manages a wide smile, “Is that so? By all means, then, feel free to translate for me.”

Dave takes the challenge and changes the channel. He hopes it’s something simple and sappy because he knows that will make Karkat happy.

The scene takes place in a courtyard or a plaza. There are trees lining up the frame. There’s a handsome man standing against a large tree, and an exaggerated amount of moonlight is hitting him. The music gets dramatic and romantic as a slender woman in a white dress runs to meet the man. 

“Okay, they’re talking, what are they saying?” Karkat whispers and scoots to sit closer to Dave.

Dave shifts to get more comfortable and be able to whisper into Karkat’s ear. 

“Okay, so she’s crying, obviously, she just ran from her wedding night,”

“Oh, shit.”

“Yeah, and he’s like why are you here? Why aren’t you with your new husband? And she's,” he pauses to listen. 

Karkat nudges him gently with an elbow.

“Okay she’s like, ‘I made a huge mistake. I- I only married him to make my father happy,”

Karkat watches as the woman clutches on to the man’s shirt. Her face is elegant even while she sobs.

“And okay, he’s like well that’s too bad?” Dave mumbles words under his breath as he searches for the words, “Or something like, she’s got to face consequences.”

The camera zooms in closer to their faces.

“She’s begging him, um, to take her back? Away. To run away with her. She doesn’t want to be married to this new guy. Oh, it sounds like her husband is her old childhood friend,” Dave swallows audibly, “but, um, yeah, she doesn’t love him. She loves this guy. Who is essentially sending her up a fucking creek,”

Dave’s voice is getting quieter, a faint tremble behind some of his words. Karkat tries to look up but Dave directs him back to the television. 

“Okay, she’s getting angry I think? She’s asking him why he showed up. They didn’t plan on meeting at this tree. I guess it’s their, okay that’s, their love tree. But he still showed up to meet her. She’s apologizing.”

Dave and Karkat watch as the woman rips off her veil and reaches for the man. The camera zooms into their kissing faces and remains like that for an uncomfortable amount of time before panning out so that they can see another, older man arrive on the scene.

“Dave, who’s that!” Karkat hisses and then shovels a fork full of noodles into his mouth. 

“That’s her, dad? Yeah, that’s her dad, oh shit. Okay, he’s telling the guy to unhand his daughter. He’s accusing him of trying to kidnap her.”

“The fucker,” Karkat growls quietly.

“The dad is accusing him of poisoning his daughter. Of soiling her purity.”

The father on the screen pulls out a gun.

Both Dave and Karkat gasp. Karkat gasps a little louder. 

“He says that he won’t let his daughter be poisoned any longer.”

The woman screams a name and tries to protect her tree lover, but he pushes her away as the gun goes off. 

The music gets loud and dramatic. It zooms into each man’s face until it pans and slowly zooms into the daughter’s bullet wound.

Karkat jumps out of his seat, “What the fuck?” he screeches.

“Why did he shoot his daughter?” he looks back down at Dave who is sitting on the couch, stunned. 

The television’s light flickers against the dark glass of his shades. 

“Hey, hey, Dave, what’s wrong?” Karkat kneels on the floor between Dave’s legs. He reaches up and cups Dave’s face and strokes his cheek with a thumb.

Dave takes a shuddering gulp of air and is barely able to hold back the pained sob that wants to trail after it. Breathing has become painful as the air gets stuck in his throat, unable to reach his lungs.

The television has cut to fast colorful commercials making it difficult to focus on anything that’s not Karkat’s worried face in front of him. 

Karkat licks his lips and Dave’s mind is transported back to the sleepy kiss Karkat gave him weeks ago. He remembers how warm and real it felt. 

He focuses on that feeling. Karkat’s weight on his body and the way he kissed him without hesitation. And Dave’s comfortable willingness to lean into the kiss. 

He tries to focus on the sweet memory and not on the scars his body bears that are telling him he’s going to end up like the woman on the screen. Bleeding to death because he couldn’t live up to his father’s expectations. 

Karkat hears the moment Dave’s breathing becomes more shallow and staggered. He shifts one hand to rest behind his neck and drops the other one to hold Dave’s trembling hand. 

“It’s okay, I’ve got you. Breath with me okay?” 

Dave’s breathing starts out shaky but he watches and listens, his focus on Karkat’s serene shifts in expression as he inhales and exhales. 

As his breathing calms down, Dave feels his body become loose. He drops his head so that both of their foreheads are touching. 

Karkat takes his hand off of Dave’s neck and reaches for the television remote. He clicks the power button and they’re left in the dark.

“Do you want to spend the night here?” Karkat whispers. 

Dave tenses.

“Or not! It’s okay! You don’t have to. I just thought that maybe if you’re not feeling up to returning back to whatever witchy sapphic things are happening at home, you could crash here? You don’t have to though.”

Karkat’s eyes are wide, and his face is vulnerable. He hopes that the dark room hides the heat building and spreading across his cheeks. 

He doesn’t want to pressure Dave but the allure of possibly getting to wake up tangled in Dave again is too much.

Nevermind, that Dave was on the verge of another anxiety attack.

“Do you have clothes I could wear?” Dave’s voice is meek and it makes Karkat want to kiss him and draw out the boisterous smug sound he knows he can make. 

“Yeah, You know everything I wear is pretty oversized. It might actually fit you.”

Karkat stands up and motions for Dave to follow him. 

They’re halfway down the hall when Dave stops in the middle of the hall. 

“You okay?”

A bright blush quickly covers his face. He has never been inside Karkat’s bedroom. But that hasn’t stopped Dave from thinking about it a lot. After his heartfelt confession to Rose, Dave took it as a personal invitation to fantasize about what Karkat does in his room.

Dave gives Karkat a stiff, slow nod and follows him inside. 

Karkat’s room is ten times messier than his workspace. Which is saying something because to Dave it looks like there’s a lot of work scattered around the room. There are piles of files, tapes, and disks, on almost every available surface except the bed.

Karkat steps over a stack of stapled papers and reaches his drawers. He pulls out a familiar worn sweater and some pants. 

“The pants might fit you a little short but I think it might work.”

He tosses them to Dave who catches them with his face. 

“I’m going to go clean up. You know where the bathroom and shit are.”

He doesn’t wait for Dave to respond before disappearing out of the room. 

Dave decides to change in the bathroom. He takes off his shades and splashes some cold water over his face. 

“Can’t believe I couldn’t hold it together,” he mumbles as he pulls his shirt over his head. Old worn scars are scattered across his torso. He places a hand over the largest one that trails from the center of his chest down towards his navel. 

“Can’t believe I almost cried over a soap opera,” he lies. He knows that’s not why he fell apart. 

He raises his face to look into his own eyes. He couldn’t breathe because he is the woman of the story. Forever chasing some duty to her father despite how miserable it made her. And by the end, his dad was going to cut him down the way her father shot her. To stop the poison. 

“He’s not poison,” he glares at himself. Someone who looked at Dave with such tender care while he forgot to breathe over a television show, could not be poison. 

He takes a deep breath and finishes changing. 

Dave steps out of the bathroom and finds himself in complete darkness, save for the light coming from Karkat’s bedroom door. 

“I figured we could share the bed? Since we have before, and um, the couch isn’t super comfortable,” Karkat sits cross-legged on one side of the bed.

“Yeah, that’s cool,” Dave musters as much of a casual tone as he can, careful not to expose how much he’s been wanting to just sleep next to Karkat again. How nervous he is to be in his presence after exposing his weakest side to Karkat only moments before. 

They quietly shuffle under the covers and Dave is overwhelmed by how much the blankets smell like Karkat. It’s an earthy scent that reminds him of autumn--warm and spice. 

Dave pulls off his glasses and sets them on top of another stack of papers on the nightstand. 

Karkat’s bed is slightly smaller than the one they shared at the retreat. Their arms are firmly pressed against each other, their hands are brushing hot with unspoken anticipation. 

“Um, are you comfortable?” 

“Uh, it's a tight fit. Could I?” 

Dave shifts in the bed and stretches out his arm. He’s blushing bright red but Karkat doesn’t call him out on it because he’s doing the same. 

Karkat adjusts himself to let Dave stretch out under him, Karkat’s head naturally falling comfortably at the shoulder. 

Neither of them thought to turn off the light but out of fear of possibly breaking up their position, they don’t mention it. 

“Dave,” Karkat whispers after what feels like minutes, “Do you want to talk about what happened?”

Dave’s arm tightens around Karkat and they press closer together. 

He means to say  _ no _ , that he doesn’t want to talk about it. That he doesn’t want to taint being in Karkat’s messy room for the first time with his own emotional baggage. 

“You kissed me,” is what he says instead. 

Karkat stiffens in his arm, “What?”

“The first night at the house. I mean, morning, I think you were still sleeping? We were wrapped around each other and you just kind of kissed me.”

Karkat sits up and climbs out of his bed. He’s not looking at Dave, he’s looking for anywhere else to focus his eyes on anything that is not Dave Strider who might be looking at him with remorse or disgust, or some other equally repulsive emotion towards Karkat. 

“Oh my god, oh my fucking god,” his voice trembles, “I thought that was a dream! Dave, Dave, I am so fucking sorry! I shouldn’t have-- I am so sorry,” he pleads

Dave sits up and watches Karkat’s lip tremble, his eyes covered by his hands. 

And Dave sees the precipice before him. He’s the bride in the telenovela before the wedding day, before it’s too late. He can’t deny that Karkat inspires a new feeling in him. He has from the first moment Rose introduced them when she set up an interview. From his first scolding to every time Karkat praised him for a job well done-- Karkat never failed to make Dave feel right. Even though Dave kept staining Karkat’s warmth with his own guilt, Dave’s craving for Karkat’s presence kept growing. 

And now he is at the point where he needs to make a choice, is he going to run away from the somber expectation of his family--of his dad-- or was he going to wait until regret consumes him and he will be the one bleeding at the hand of his father? 

Dave pushes the covers off and moves to sit at the edge of the bed. He reaches for Karkat’s hands and pulls him in. 

Karkat’s eyes are glossy with welled up tears and Dave finds that the only shame he feels as he cups Karkat’s round face is the shame of having pushed him to tears. 

Dave’s eyes flicker between meeting Karkat’s eyes and his mouth. His heart is racing, he’s giddy with excitement running through his body as if it were reacting to finally taking honest action. 

Karkat blinks and the tears that have been threatening to run, finally escape. He doesn’t fight Dave’s pull and moves in closer. His eyes fixated on Dave’s bright red. 

Except, now the red is like a faint ring around his blown up dark pupils. 

Karkat’s eyes flutter and then close as Dave’s face tilts and moves in. 

Their lips connect and Karkat feels a languid moan reverberate in his chest and up to his throat. He places his hands on Dave’s shoulders and lets them slide down to grab at the fabric on his chest.

There’s a hint of hesitation but Karkat can’t pinpoint if it's Dave or himself. He knows that he’s treading risky waters, allowing himself to indulge in Dave when it’s neither professional nor fair to get his hopes up. 

Karkat pulls back to catch his breath and Dave chases his mouth crashing onto Karkat. The force ignites something hot in Karkat. He matches Dave’s force with equal fervor. 

Dave falls backward on the bed without letting go of Karkat. His weight on top of him feels like the grounding force he’s been looking for all of his life. Dave feels like he’s finally being tethered to the ground instead of just ambivalently existing through his own life. 

Karkat nips at Dave’s bottom lip and waits for an opening before pushing his tongue into Dave’s mouth. 

Dave opens up for Karkat and lets himself revel in his taste. His senses are overwhelmed with the scent and feel of Karkat over him. 

Karkat pulls back again, he’s panting. He’s looking at Dave and waiting for him to stop him or reject him. Karkat wants Dave, there’s no denying it. But his friendship with him is just as meaningful, and that’s not something he’s willing to put at risk. 

If it came down to having a little bit of Dave versus none of him, Karkat can live with whatever he gets. 

Worry pokes its way through Dave’s resolve, “Wha- why’d, why’d you stop?” 

Karkat places a hand on Dave’s chest, “Are you sure?”

The question is vague, Karkat doesn’t even really know what he’s asking, and maybe he’s asking everything. 

_ Are you sure you want to do this? _

_ Are you sure you want me? _

_ Are you sure this isn’t a mistake? _

If it had been anyone else, Dave would take the out he was being provided. But it’s Karkat and all he wants is more of him. 

Dave moves his hands to rest on Karkat’s hips and squeezes. Dave’s smile isn’t the boisterous confident one that is made for public consumption--the one that gets middle-aged folks to write into Karkat’s work email inquiring about Mr.Strider’s relationship status, but Karkat recognizes the genuine private honesty in the expression that he wishes he could capture and keep for himself. 

Karkat smiles back and dips down to place kisses on Dave’s jawline. Whereas Karkat was sitting with his knees on either side of Dave before, he lets Dave’s hands guide him down so that he’s firmly sitting on Dave’s lower abdomen. 

Dave looks for Karkat’s mouth again, their kiss getting messier and more aggressive. His hands trail up and under the old oversized shirt, Karkat is wearing. His hand searing into Karkat’s already hot body.

Karkat kisses Dave’s neck and moans at his touch. Desire wells up in Karkat, quickly spreading to his groin. He pushes his hips down and grinds against Dave. 

Dave lets out a gasp followed by a groan. His fingers move back to Karkat’s hips and dig into the soft skin. Karkat, hisses and smiles against Dave’s neck and rolls his hips back again. Dave bucks his hips seeking the additional friction, the only voice left in Dave’s head is thankful that he’s no longer wearing obstructive jeans-- just Karkat’s worn sweatpants. 

Karkat’s hands tug at the familiar hem of the sweater. Each sound and move Dave makes him greedier for more contact, more memories he can store in a tactile scrapbook about Dave that he’s quickly building. 

Dave moves to sit up and Karat moves to the side to give him space. Dave’s face is flushed and his mouth looks almost raw and relaxed. His hair is not really as messy as Karkat wants it to be. 

He watches Dave pull off the sweater and let it fall to the floor. 

Karkat feels like the air has been punched out of him, as he lets his eyes trail down Dave’s chest. 

Little notches, white and pink scars that trail across his torso. A long thin one runs down his sternum.

“Dave, what happened?”

He shakes his head, this isn’t the first time his scars have killed the mood. 

“Not now, please,” he leans into Karkat and places a kiss on the corner of Karkat’s mouth before pressing their foreheads together, “I don’t want to ruin this,” 

Karkat sighs, “ Dave Strider, you couldn’t ruin this if you fucking tried.”

Dave’s heart doesn’t break, it mends. Karkat’s words feel like a miracle salve that’s been rubbed on a wound that has been open too long. 

Karkat pulls him into a kiss and lets his fingers spread across Dave’s chest and takes in the real solidness of the man in front of him. 

Dave breaks their kiss by pulling up Karkat’s shirt and tossing it with the sweater. Karkat is softer and rounder than Dave, but it makes him all the more inviting.

Karkat bites his lower lip and turns his head to the side. He hasn’t revealed his body to someone since Eridan and that was always a toss-up between adoration and humiliation. 

Dave pushes Karkat back into the bed and presses his lips right below the collarbone before trailing back up his neck and jaw. 

Karkat arches into Dave’s touch, their skin grazing against each other, and the heat that was dissipating from his groin comes back with painful enthusiasm.

He growls and pushes Dave to the side and climbs over him. Dave pants and grins at Karkat’s renewed confidence and pushes his hips up to meet Karkat’s hip roll. 

Karkat lets out a breathy moan and presses his palm into Dave’s shoulder to get leverage. He can feel Dave getting harder through his borrowed pants. 

He lets Dave pull him down to lay on his chest with their fingers locked together. Karkat buries his face in the crook of Dave’s neck. His panting gets louder and faster as their fully clothed groins grind against each other. 

Dave’s breath hitches when Karkat whimpers against his ear.

  
“Oh god, fuck, Dave,”

Dave groans, rich with arousal at the sound of Karkat calling out his name. His body vibrates, searching for completion. 

He moves his legs up for leverage and rubs harder into Karkat who begins to emit soft and desperate whimpers.

“Yeah,” Dave pants into Karkat’s hair, “Yeah, fuck, Karkat, I’m close.”

“Mmhmm, me too, fuck, Dave, if you keep--” Karkat digs his nails into the flesh of Dave’s shoulders, “Dave, Dave, Dave,” 

The sound pulls Dave’s orgasm out of him and the pleasure tears through his body to choke a visceral cry from escaping. 

Karkat feels Dave twitch beneath him as he thrusts up one last time. And the recognition that Dave is tensing in orgasm is enough to send Karkat over the edge. He presses down one last time and murmurs Dave’s name as his dick pulses, releasing hot liquid into his pants. 

Karkat goes limp on top of Dave. They’re both still panting, their bodies riding the bliss of climax together. Dave runs a hand across Karkat’s spine and places a kiss on his temple. Karkat purrs at the action before slowly lifting himself up. He places a chaste kiss on Dave’s lips before rolling off of him. 

Karkat’s hand finds Dave’s and while there is a moment of hesitation, Dave folds his hand over Karkat’s in reassurance.

When his breath has leveled out, Karkat risks turning to look at Dave. He is facing up with his eyes closed, and Karkat feels a tiny bit sad that he can’t see his eyes. 

“Dave,” Karkat whispers, “Are you okay?”

Eyes closed, he grins, “Yeah, why? Are you? Okay?” He opens one eye to find that Karkat is half sitting up looking at him. 

“I am, but,” Karkat drops back on the bed and runs his free hand through his hair. 

Dave tightens his hold on Karkat’s hand. 

“Was this your first time? With, um, with a guy?”

Dave tenses, “That bad, huh?”

“What? No!, Fuck, it was so good, so fucking good I’m still reeling. But,” his voice gets smaller, “I’m worried you’ll regret it. You’ll regret being with me.”

Dave’s eyes flutter open. He lets go of Karkat so that he can sit up and look at him. Karkat is looking away, his brows furrowed together in a way that Dave knows Karkat is hiding his worry. 

His eyes contemplate Karkat’s soft profile, his torso still exposed and the stain on his pants that undoubtedly matches Dave’s own. 

“Karkat,” Dave’s voice doesn’t shake, “I don’t regret being with you. Yes, this was definitely my first time. Even though we didn’t do anything, um, super intense. I mean it felt intense, but we didn’t do, y’know, the do, “

Karkat snorts and can’t hold back an amused eye roll.

Dave grins and scoots closer, “Fuck, it was intense, and I don’t regret it. I don’t regret doing this with you.”

Karkat sighs and faces Dave so that he can pull him into a gentle kiss. Dave leans into him with a pleased hum. 

Dave can’t believe he ever thought about denying himself this moment. It feels like the most honest and pure feeling. Like the pieces of the puzzle to his being, that his upbringing had shattered, are finally coming together to show him what it is to be  _ complete _ . 

He knows that there are bridges he hasn’t crossed yet, but sitting in Karkat’s room, wearing his short pants, wrapped in Karkat’s scent while they kiss in the most innocent way they have that night-- Dave feels like he could cross every bridge, burn them all down, and never look back. 

Karkat is the one that pulls back and rests his forehead on Dave’s shoulder.

“We should probably get cleaned up,” 

Dave draws in another long breath through his nose, “Yeah, okay. You got any more pants I can borrow?” he grins.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dang it boys, not all the way yet? 
> 
> I hope that I was able to deliver! Things can only go up from here!!
> 
> I also wrote something on the side and called a part of this series. It's just Rose and Kanaya's engagement. So feel free to check that out if you are curious. It's short and simple. 
> 
> Thank you again for your comments and readership! This week is shaping up to be quite the storm and your thoughts and sharing my writing with y'all give me the motivation to do all of the things!


	9. two weeks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dave and Karkat try to keep things in the DL but fail to do so. 
> 
> Either way, Dave looks at Karkat with new determination.

It’s been two weeks since Karkat popped Dave’s gay cherry and Dave feels like he’s losing his mind. 

They haven’t had the conversation where they try to define what they are or what they’re doing-- Both men worried that the moment they name whatever they’ve started it will fall apart. 

And because they haven’t told anyone, they try to go about business as usual at work and Karkat thinks they’re doing an excellent job of it. 

They’ve stopped having lunch together,  _ “Low key, if I’m alone with you right now, I don’t know if I’ll be able to stop myself from throwing myself at you.” “Fair point.” _

And they keep a generous distance from each other at all times to make sure they don’t accidentally hold hands or something of the like. 

But each evening, Dave helps Karkat close down the office. Kanaya always offers to take Rose home, and Dave always assures her that he will make sure Karkat goes home at a reasonable hour. 

Sometimes they manage to make it home, back to Karkat’s bedroom where they try to make up for lost time with fierce kisses and roaming hands. Other times they barely make it to the car before they’re all over each other, fogging up the windows of Dave’s car. 

And every night, Dave feels a hot frustration building at Karkat’s careful touch. 

**\---**

Karkat has been busy all week filming at different locations with the crew and because it will be their last he’s given them free rein over their themes. 

John chose the old and only movie theater, Jade filmed hers at a local nursery’s greenhouse, and now Rose was filming hers in an alley downtown.

“You couldn’t have chosen a more disgusting location?” Karkat barks while he steadies the camera.

“It has sentimental significance,” Rose smiles for the camera but Karkat is aware of how her eyes drift to where Kanaya is sitting aways down the alley. 

“No one watching this is going to know that, dork. They’re going to think this is just you being an emo goth.”

Rose grins and Karkat quickly starts recording, she looks precious in a way that makes Karkat hope to see Dave smile with the same openness one day. Their resemblance is striking, especially now that Karkat has seen Dave’s eyes. 

“Well, they wouldn’t be wrong.”

“Whatever, let’s get your seedy alley shots so we can wrap up here.”

Rose moves closer to the wall, her lavender power suit stands out against the graffitied brick wall. She places a hand on her hip and Karkat’s eyes are drawn to the engagement ring for a brief moment. 

He moves the camera around catching multiple angles before setting it back in its case and pulling out a photo camera. 

“Is everything alright between you two?” She walks over to the steel back entrance of the establishment and bends over to dust the step with her hand. 

Karkat fidgets with the camera lens, “I don’t know what you’re talking about?”

“Between you and Dave. Did something happen?”

Karkat fumbles with the camera.

Rose raises an eyebrow in Kanaya’s direction and Karkat wonders if they’re communicating telepathically. 

“I don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about!” Karkat fails to play it off, his cheeks are red with embarrassment.

Rose plops down on the step and shifts into an effortless pose. “You two have been unusually distant the last few weeks,” She smiles, polite and professional and Karkat takes the shot. He hopes the picture doesn’t come out blurry.

“No, we haven’t.”

“I saw you walk into a room and then do a one-eighty when you saw it was just Dave inside. And Dave has been taking lunch with Kanaya and I every day, which, I love him, he’s my brother, but he is also very annoying sometimes,” She shifts into a power pose. 

“That sounds like a ‘you’ problem,” Karkat mumbles. 

She looks at him knowingly, “Did he say something to you?”

Karkat peeks over the camera, “No.”

_ That’s not a lie. They haven’t really talked. _

“Hmm, then maybe something happened?”

It takes every ounce of Karkat’s willpower to not look in Dave’s direction. 

“That’s none of your fucking business,” There’s no bite to Karkat’s words.

“I can’t imagine it’s bad. He’s been taking you home almost every night. We should really coordinate something so that he and Kanaya can figure out a more convenient car schedule.” She stands up and cleans her pants. “Or is it bad?” She makes her way to Karkat’s side. She takes the camera from his hands as if to inspect the pictures, but she holds his gaze. 

He wants to look away. He tries to but fails. 

“It’s not bad.”

_ Far from it, actually.  _

“Oh?”

Karkat groans. Her inflection on the simple syllable is gleeful.

“Not bad? That’s good. So he  _ did  _ say something?”

Karkat yanks the camera back out of her hands, “We haven’t really had time to talk about it.” 

“Been busy, eh?” She snickers.

He doesn’t have a chance to respond. Rose wraps a tight arm around Karkat’s shoulders, she squeezes and a high pitched sound that Karkat has never heard comes out of her. It is so out of character it almost scares him. 

When she lets go, he teeters to the side and is ready to glare back at her but his eyes go wide at the sincerity he finds in her eyes.

**\---**

Kanaya hands Dave a cup of hot cider before sitting on the bench next to him. 

The autumn weather has gotten crisper and announces the need to start filming their last commercial and title cards. 

Today is the last day of filming, and while it’s usually just Kanaya, Karkat and whoever is being filmed-- Rose and Dave opted to go with each other since their locations are in close proximity. 

Dave sips his hot drink and takes in the warm spiciness.

It reminds him of Karkat. 

_ Does Karkat taste like apple cider?  _

“I’m not sure? I imagine he would taste more like a hot pocket? He eats so many I am sure that it is part of his bodily composition.”

Dave jumps, some of his cider spilling. 

“What?”

Kanaya tsks but takes a handkerchief out and hands it to him. “You asked if Karkat tastes like apple cider,” she says nonchalantly. “See, this is why I did not let you change ahead of time.”

Dave pushes his glasses up and lets his hand linger over his face and hide the inevitable crimson spreading over his face. 

He pat dries his coat, “Oh, well you know me. Messy Dave Strider, always spilling something. Rose definitely got all of the graceful genes in the fam. I’ve never seen her trip or spill anything,” 

Kanaya smiles to herself, “She spills things sometimes.”

“Really? Well, I’ve yet to see it. Me on the other hand, I spill everything. Cider, juice, beans, I spill it all.”

She looks at him funny and he grins at her, proud of his ability to deflect. 

“How are you, Dave?”

His grin softens and he brings up his cider to his mouth. He doesn’t drink from it, only keeps it in place.

“I’m alright. Pretty good, actually. Better than I have been in a while,” Dave’s eyes flicker toward Karkat who is directing Rose from behind the camera. “I’m also worried? Like I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop? Multiple shoes. None of them are pairs, I am waiting for a bunch of different lefty shoes to drop on top of my head and knock me out. Knock some sense in me and ask how dare I suddenly feel so, I don’t know, so good? I don’t know what I’m saying.”

Dave sighs.

Kanaya nods as she catches Rose staring at her, eyebrow raised. She doesn’t need to say more to let her fiance know that she’s finally cracking the mystery that has been Dave and Karkat the last couple of weeks.

“I think I understand what you mean. Although I feel like things are falling into place with Rose and me, as if there is nothing that can bring us down from this place of joy, there is a small voice that is fearful and bracing itself for it to all come crumbling down.”

Dave swallows. 

“But I have to remember not to let that voice grow any stronger or bigger than it is. If I did, I would not get to enjoy the  _ good _ things that are happening right now. And I need to experience these pleasant moments so that I can remember them when things do become unpleasant or difficult,” her eyes close for a moment. When she opens them she looks at Dave, “These good memories are what give us strength.”

Dave sips his drink, “Yeah, I get what you mean.”

“I take it, you’ve talked to Karkat then?”

Dave squeaks and Kanaya has to bite her tongue to keep herself from teasing him.

“Talk to him about what?” 

“Dave,” 

“Kanaya.”

“You think those glasses hide your emotions, but your feelings are written all over your face.”

Dave’s jaw drops.

“Also, you mumble and talk to yourself quite a bit. If you have not yet talked to Karkat about your feelings, you should. Before it is too late.”

Dave finally turns to face Kanaya. She places an encouraging hand on his bicep. 

“Lots of change is coming up, and I think it would be a shame if you both missed the opportunity to give your relationship a fighting chance. Especially when you are both so hopelessly head over heels for each other.”

Panic stirs, “D-Did Rose--?”

Kanaya huffs and shakes her head, “No, Rose did not tell me. As I said, you are surprisingly expressive, or have I become skilled in interpreting  _ Strilonde  _ facial expressions, as Karkat calls it? And he constantly talks about you. He seems convinced that you are very straight.”

That makes Dave’s heart twist a little, “We haven’t really talked about it. I know I’m pretty terrified to think about it. Everything about this thing we are doing is so new, but so--”

“Good.”

“Yeah. And god, I want more. Like, I haven’t really looked for other jobs because I don’t want to risk ending up somewhere far from him? Is that stupid?”

“Not at all.”

“Like in my mind, in my fucking heart, I know that I just want to go and be with Karkat. Because he feels like home? Oh my god,” he lets out a laugh that almost sounds like a sob. “Oh my fucking god, that’s it. Karkat feels like home.”

_ What home is supposed to feel like? _

The realization hits Dave like a brick wall. 

“Whenever I’m with Karkat, I feel so much stronger than before. I feel safe and like I am exactly where I need to be. And it’s terrifying, but you’re right. I gotta hold on to the good memories,” Dave closes his eyes and drinks from the cider. It’s cooled down but the spice is still there. It definitely tastes like Karkat. 

“Draw strength from those moments, Dave. They are worth it.”

“Yeah,” he nods, “Yeah,” he thinks, “Yeah? Hey,” he thinks about the last two weeks. “Hey, why the fuck is he so cautious? Why, augh!?” he chugs the last of his cider. 

“Cautious?” Kanaya tilts her head.

“Yeah! He’s so fucking careful and gentle, and I know he’s holding back. Fuck, is he holding back for me?”

Kanaya blinks twice before it clicks.

“Oh, dear. Um, okay. I am not sure but--”

“And I know Jade told Rose that Karkat is a patient l-lover. And he is, the goddamn sweetheart... And the first couple of times that was fine--”

“Dave--” Kanaya covers her face with her hands.

“But it’s been two weeks and we haven’t moved past first base! And I know I’m pretty much a virgin, but I think, no. I  _ know _ , I’m ready to at least get to third. I mean we started in second and now we’re stuck on first? That’s definitely not how it is supposed to go. And I think I’m ready for a home run.” the words spill out of Dave.

Kanaya growls and it sounds so much like Karkat it startles him. 

“I think that’s a conversation you should have with Karkat. But I am sure he’s just trying to be respectful of your boundaries.”

Dave crosses his arms and looks to where Rose looks to be tackling Karkat.

“Well,” he mumbles, “I wish he were a little less respectful.”

**\---**

Karkat drives them to the next location. He can see Rose and Kanaya texting away in the back seat, throwing an occasional glance between him and Dave.

Dave is twiddling his thumbs and staring out the window. Karkat has the urge to reach out and take one of Dave’s hands and hold it. 

He wonders if Dave also feels the looming weight of conversation that they’ve been avoiding. 

They arrive at the orchard and Karkat falls back into work mode. 

“Let’s get you dressed,” Kanaya pulls Dave to the side of the work van.

“Here, I’ll help you,” Rose follows Karkat to the designated film site. 

**\---**

“I’m ready,”

Karkat turns around ready to chew Dave and Kanaya out for taking so long.

Whatever he was going to say dies on the tip of his tongue.

Dave is dressed in the same red suit that he wore to the executive dinner. Kanaya has made some alterations and the lapel and the cuffs are now black. He’s wearing a black shirt and a white bow tie. 

Karkat’s brain spins at the sight. 

“Karkat?” Kanaya asks.

“What? Oh. Dave, go, over there.”

Dave can see the pink in Karkat’s cheeks and he feels his stomach fill with butterflies. 

“Okay, your turn.”

Rose snatches the equipment from Karkat’s hands and flails as Kanaya drags him back to the van. 

Dave watches them go.

“What’s that about?” 

Rose shoos her brother back towards the trees, “Never mind that, let’s hurry and get these shots.”

She directs Dave around for his professional shots. He looks incredibly out of place amongst the yellowing apple trees. His red suit manages to clash and blend into the environment which makes for some frustrating commentary and direction from Rose.

“Oh,” she lowers the camera, “they’re back.”

Dave turns around to see and the butterflies come back full force. There’s so many it feels like they might burst out of his mouth any second in horror movie fashion. 

Karkat is also wearing his executive dinner suit. Dave’s heart starts slamming inside his chest. He has fantasized about Karkat in this black suit many times. 

Kanaya has also made alterations to this ensemble. Karkat is wearing a dark red shirt and black tie. It is by no means as jarring as Dave’s red suit, but it makes Karkat look so much more confident and put together. 

Dave watches Karkat look away and run a hand through his hair. It reminds him of the Instagram picture his dad found.

A knot forms in his throat and it hurts to swallow. 

Kanaya pushes Karkat towards Dave and ignores his protest as she moves them around.

“Try not to look so stiff?” She warns as she glides away towards Rose, who is at the ready with the camera. 

“What are you two thinking?” Karkat stomps.

“We want a good picture! And these suits took Kanaya a long time to make! She deserves a nice picture where you’re not drunk and Dave isn’t all mopey!”

Karkat flinches and moves back into his Kanaya designated spot. 

“Sorry,” Karkat whispers, he’s staring down at the leaf-covered ground.

Dave blinks, “For what?”

“What do you mean for what? For making you uncomfortable, you fucking jackass.”

A small huff escapes Dave, and then a chuckle, and then something closer to a laugh.

Karkat frowns and looks up at Dave’s face. 

“I’m not uncomfortable,” Dave finally says and drops his head on Karkat’s shoulder, “I’m just trying not to lose my shit in front of our sisters or try to jump your bones in a public place. God, Karkat,” 

Karkat’s arms reach up and around Dave. The weight of his hands ignite  _ that feeling _ in Dave again. 

Dave brings up his own hands. One tilts Karkat’s face up and the other pushes his glasses up into his hair. 

Karkat lets out a shuddering breath when he sees Dave’s eyes. 

Dave closes the distance and presses his mouth against Karkat. His tongue quickly finds its way into Karkat’s mouth and the butterflies melt into something warm and smooth as Karkat leans into Dave with a soft moan. 

Rose clears her throat and both men jump back.

“This isn’t exactly what we had in mind, but I guess it works,” She laughs into Kanaya’s shoulder. 

**\---**

Kanaya makes them take off the suits and Karkat has half a mind to argue that they should be allowed to wear them home. His body is buzzing with the anticipation of getting Dave behind closed doors and he knows getting to have Dave to himself while in the suit would fulfill some fantasies. 

“We are all having breakfast tomorrow! Don’t be late!” Rose shouts at Karkat from the passenger seat of Kanaya’s car.

Dave waves goodbye.

Kanaya wishes Dave luck before she drives away.

Karkat buckles into the passenger seat next to Dave, “Luck with what?” 

“You know, stuff. Baseball.”

Karkat rolls his eyes, “Dave, you don’t play sports.”

Dave grins and Karkat feels a warm current run down his back.

“Yeah, I know.”

They make their way back home, their breathing already stunted and hot. Dave reaches for Karkat’s hand and Karkat has to remind himself that crawling over the seat to kiss Dave could actually be a dangerous situation. 

Instead, Karkat traces circles in Dave’s palms, and the soft sensation runs straight to Dave’s dick. 

They run from the car to the front door. Dave presses behind Karkat as he fumbles to find the correct key. 

Karkat finally unlocks the door and yelps when Dave all but carries him through the door. 

Dave pushes him against the wall and dives in to catch Karkat’s lips. His fingers dig into the skin at his waist as Karkat groans against him. 

Dave moves with confidence in a way that he hasn't before. He kisses Karkat with a new determination that reminds him of the Strider swagger that has been sexual fodder for Karkat from the first moment he met Dave. 

Karkat drags his hands up into Dave’s blond hair. He tugs him back so that Dave’s neck becomes exposed and Karkat moves to press his lips against Dave’s pulse. 

Dave pants, his eyes fluttering shut behind his shades. Karkat slowly guides Dave towards the wall so that they’ve traded positions. Now he’s the one that has Dave pinned.

It starts happening and Dave doesn’t really process what has begun. Karkat kisses him, with matching fervor, and then kisses down his jawline, trailing down his neck. 

It takes him a moment to recognize that Karkat has dropped down to his knees and is looking up at Dave expectantly.

“Do you want me to?”

Karkat’s voice is low and gravely, and Dave whimpers at how incredibly hot he sounds. 

Dave takes a deep breath and nods.

Karkat smiles and licks his lips. 

He gives Dave’s thigh a quick squeeze before moving back up to undo the pants. Karkat gently pulls down the zipper but it is enough pressure that Dave grunts at the feeling. 

Karkat’s mouth waters as he’s met with Dave’s cock pushing out through his boxers. He pulls down Dave’s pants and shorts enough so that he can have access to Dave. He grips Dave’s exposed thigh with one hand and takes Dave’s cock in the other. 

Dave lets out a small gasp and Karkat can feel him get harder in his hand. He takes his tongue and licks up his length before taking the tip into his mouth. 

The moan that Dave lets out is like a ghost hand yanking at Karkat’s own dick. He feels himself getting more erect at the sound.

He works on getting as much of Dave in his mouth. He’s conflicted, he wants to take his time, taste all of Dave as much as he can, but each stroke is inspiring the most delicious sounds out of Dave and it’s music to Karkat’s ears. He wants to do nothing more than hear a running loop of it. 

“Oh fuck, Karkat--” Dave pants. 

Karkat lets him fall out of his mouth and admires how much his cock has grown as Karkat dips down and takes one of Dave’s balls into his mouth. 

“Oh, fuck!” Dave’s hips thrust forward. 

Karkat squeezes his thigh and pushes him back against the wall. He takes the other ball and sucks on it while his hand strokes Dave’s wet cock. 

He releases Dave from his mouth with a pop and looks up.

Dave’s face is flush red with parted lips and his glasses are askew on his face, one red eye exposed. 

Karkat doesn’t break eye contact as he guides Dave’s cock back into his mouth. He feels Dave twitch in his mouth.

Dave feels his body tense in the most pleasant way. He can’t stop looking at Karkat as his head bops up and down with enthusiastic rhythm. 

He catches Karkat’s hand drops to press against his groin over his own pants. The thought of Karkat getting hard while having Dave’s dick in his mouth, makes him moan again. 

Dave’s hands twist at the shirt he’s wearing but quickly gives in to the temptation of running his hands through Karkat’s hair. 

Karkat makes a choked sound at the sensation and the vibration shatters Dave. 

“Ah-- Karkat!”

He spills into Karkat’s mouth without additional warning. 

Karkat, surprised at the warm liquid pouring into his mouth, struggles for air, and starts coughing. 

Dave reaches for him. 

“Shit, Karkat, are you okay?” His voice is breathy and his expression is hazy. “I didn’t mean to cum so quickly,” his words trail off as he notices a white streak coming out of the corner of Karkat’s mouth. He absentmindedly wipes it away with his thumb. 

“I’m fine, I’m just--” Karkat’s bites the inside of his cheeks and rubs his legs against each other. 

A wave of awareness pours over Dave as he pulls Karkat up. He takes off his glasses and tosses them on top of the discarded jackets next to them. 

Dave pulls Karkat in for another kiss and pulls his pants back up enough so he can walk. 

“C’mon,” Dave whispers into Karkat’s ear before taking his hand and pulling him in the direction of the bedroom. 

Karkat shuffles behind Dave, feeling like a stranger in his own home. The bed that Dave is pushing him into doesn’t feel like his own, the walls with its posters, the sheets, and the smells, everything seems unknown. 

The only thing Karkat’s brain can recognize is Dave. With his bright eyes, blond hair, soft lips, skin that tastes almost sweet and cool. 

Dave plants a chaste kiss on Karkat’s cheek and the innocence of it makes Karkat’s heart melt. He thinks he might be grinning like a dazed fool because Dave takes a look at his face and chuckles before kissing the other cheek. 

Karkat lets Dave pull the large sweater, shirt, and all over Karkat’s head. 

“Karkat, you’re so fucking beautiful. Do you know that?” He kisses his jawline. “Of course, I should’ve known that you’d be the one to get my head out of my ass,” Dave runs his fingers lightly down Karkat’s chest and kisses his collarbone, “Who was I kidding? I was a goner the moment I laid eyes on your grouchy pout.”

Dave bites lightly a few centimeters above Karkat’s nipple and smirks when Karkat whimpers. 

“I kept writing shitty ass reports just so you’d call me into your office to yell at me.”

Dave’s hand reaches down to rub Karkat’s dick over his pants.

Karkat lets out a guttural sound, “You fucking asshole, I knew you couldn’t improve that quickly,”

Dave undoes the button to Karkat’s pants, “And then, fuck, I was so fucking jealous of Eridan,” 

“Wha--”

“I thought for sure he was going to take you at that dinner. You looked so fucking good in that suit, I should’ve asked Kanaya to let you wear it for the rest of today.”

Dave traces his way down Karkat’s body searing soft kisses on his way. 

“I was so stupid, I couldn’t figure it out. I wasted so much time,” 

Karkat frowns at Dave’s suddenly sad voice. 

“Dave, no--”

Dave pulls off Karkat’s pants leaving him completely naked.

“I don’t want to waste any more time,” he kisses him at the base of his cock and Dave sees it come to life. 

It’s daunting, Dave realizes. He has Karkat exposed beneath him, waiting and inviting and Dave can’t help but be filled with nervous energy. 

Instinct tells him to look and find the regret and fear that is inevitably always lurking somewhere not too far from his thoughts. He struggles to find it.

“Dave, you’re not stupid. Dense maybe, fuck, I’ve wanted you so goddamn much. It’s embarrassing. I thought for sure you had figured out a while ago.”

Karkat covers his face with his hands. 

“Embarrassing?” Dave’s voice cracks.

Karkat realizes the implication and shoots up to a sitting position knocking into Dave. 

“Fuck, no, like, I’m embarrassing. I watched so many youtube compilations and jacked off to you like a fucking creep! And it wasn’t just that. Goddamnit, I don’t want you to think I only want you for carnal reasons. But you’re thoughtful and funny, even though you are annoying as fuck sometimes, you are so protective of the people you love, and that just-- augh, that just makes me want to, I don’t know, just be with you. I just want to be with you! A lot! Always!”

Karkat gasps and then groans at the sincerity of his own words. He falls back on the bed and is already reaching for a pillow or something nearby to hide behind when he feels like the air has been punched out of him. 

Dave’s lips are wrapped around the tip of Karkat’s cock. If it was softening up, it hardens in an instant. 

He pushes Karkat’s legs up so that they rest over his shoulders, “This is also the first time I’m giving someone a blow job so…”

Karkat smiles, an odd sense of pride falls over him, “Yeah, no, this is good. You’re doing so good,” he pants.

Dave takes Karkat in his mouth again and lets his saliva lubricate his path. Karkat is thicker than Dave and he absolutely loves it. He feels his own cock start coming back to life in his pants. 

Karkat decidedly does not taste like apple cider, but the taste of his precum and the hot weight of his dick in Dave’s mouth is satisfying nonetheless. 

“Dave,” Karkat begs and runs his hand through Dave’s hair. 

Dave’s tongue circles over the head of the cock and Karkat lets out a loud gasp, “Dave, fucking damn, do that again,” Dave revels at the neediness. 

He does as instructed but this time also takes his hand to massage Karkat’s balls while he does it. 

“Ha-- how? How the fuck are you so good at this if it's your first time?” Karkat chokes on his words as they get caught up in another loud moan. 

Beaming at the praise, Dave picks up his pace. 

“Fuck! Wait, wait,” 

Dave stops and pulls away. Karkat moves to sit up swinging his legs off of Dave’s shoulders. 

He tugs Dave up by his shirt and is glad when Dave takes it as an invitation to remove his clothes. 

Karkat helps him remove the shirt, his eyes grazing over the scars that he’s now touched many times but they still haven’t really talked about. 

Dave pushes his pants back down, his hard dick making itself present. 

Karkat growls and pushes Dave into the bed so that he’s sitting up against the pillows and the headboard. He straddles Dave’s hips and Dave’s brain short circuits for a moment.

Karkat pulls him into a passionate kiss. Dave matches the energy and uses his hands to scoot Karkat closer to his chest, leaving their dicks to press against each other. 

Dave takes his hand and wraps it around Karkat’s cock, using both of their precum to make his hand slick as they move. 

Karkat’s eyes roll back as he feels his mind go blank for a moment. It takes him a second to remember that he had changed their positions for a reason. 

  
  


He reaches under the pillow behind Dave and pulls out a little clear bottle of lube. 

Dave is so focused he doesn’t notice Karkat flub around with the bottle until he feels the cold liquid fall on his dick. 

He hisses and Karkat kisses the corner of his mouth as an apology. 

Their dicks pressed together become a slippery mess but the added lube makes the friction more pleasure than pain. Karkat takes Dave’s cock into his hand and starts to stroke and twist with his wrist.

Both of their breathing becomes labored and Karkat swears their heartbeats are on the same beat. 

“Dave, you’re so good, you’re gonna make me--” Karkat whimpers and lets his head fall forward to hit Dave’s forehead. 

“Fuck, Karkat, I want to see you cum,”

Karkat’s thighs shake as orgasm rocks through him. As if he had been holding on until Dave permitted him. 

Hot white liquid covers Dave’s hand while he gently holds on to Karkat’s dick as he rides out his orgasm. 

Karkat’s eyes are glazed over, the most serene expression on his face. 

“Dave, you gotta,” Karkat drawls out, his voice just as blissed out. 

Dave takes his hand and starts to jerk himself, watching Karkat’s awe-filled expression as he watches Dave finish. He looks like he’s witnessing a miracle.

The moment he feels it coming he searches for Karkat’s mouth and presses a hard closed-mouth kiss over his lips. 

**\---**

_ It’s not a home run yet, _

Dave thinks to himself in the dark. Karkat, fresh and clean, has his head resting on Dave’s chest with an arm wrapped around him. 

He’s breathing low and slow, a peaceful expression veiled over his face. 

Dave feels happy in the way that being with Karkat always makes him feel happy and at ease. In the dark though, he can’t hide from the same shadows that have been tormenting him his whole life. 

Karkat stirs in his arms. Dave pulls him tighter. 

He doesn’t want to let go. 

But that means really opening himself up. 

Dave’s eyes begin to feel heavy with sleep. He thinks about these good moments and Kanaya’s words about drawing strength from them. 

Dave drifts into sleep as he’s memorizing the feeling of Karkat sleeping peacefully in his arms. He’s going to need the strength. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to get this out even though it feels incomplete. 
> 
> I've had emotional and mental whiplash from work as our start dates keep getting moved around because the state is on fire. Legit can barely breathe inside my bedroom because the smoke is seeping through. I hate it!
> 
> But getting to write sexy times between Karkat and Dave was a fun distraction!
> 
> Thank you for reading! This is meant to be the penultimate chapter but uh...it might get extended for one more!
> 
> I hope you're all doing okay! Drink water and get some sleep!


	10. Two weeks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please keep in mind that Dave describes some of his childhood trauma and abuse in this chapter.

Karkat wakes up hungry. He has Dave’s arm wrapped around his torso, keeping Karkat’s back pressed to Dave’s chest. He’s warm and perfectly content with their position but his stomach is growling so loudly it is painful. 

His insides roar and Dave buries his face in Karkat’s dark hair with a loud sigh. 

Karkat begins to pry Dave’s arm off of him and Dave reacts by tightening and pulling him closer in. 

“My stomach is about to fucking eat itself, Dave.”

Dave grumbles incoherently into Karkat’s hair. 

Karkat struggles comically flails and kicks his feet until Dave finally lets him go with a short whine. 

“You’re gonna get full and then Rose and Kanya will yell at you for snuffing their breakfast,” Dave drawls and watches Karkat pull in a black long sleeve. 

The slivers of sunlight coming int through the openings of the blinds hit Karkat softly. The yellow glow illuminates him like a grumpy angel. 

He looks at Karkat with a wide, sleepy, smile that makes the corners of his eyes wrinkle. 

A light pink begins to scatter across Karkat’s face when he catches Dave’s bright eyes watching him. 

“What,” He barks.

“Just thinking about you,” the words spill out of him. 

Karkat rolls his eyes but he doesn’t hold back his smile, “Awesome. I’m thinking about coffee.” 

“Oh, well now I’m thinking about coffee. And you know what? Coffee sounds dope.”

“See? What would you do without me, Dave Strider?”

He means it playfully but it draws Dave back to his last thoughts before falling asleep. 

At this point, recognizing the feelings he has for Karkat, Dave cannot imagine a future without Karkat. 

Dave has bever experienced this before. There were brief flings in college, but no one was worth sticking around for. His adolescence was spent in survival mode-- always alert and wary of everything and everyone. It was a surprise he managed to make friends with John and Dave at all. 

Even dating Jade felt like a hail mary, a doomed attempt at fulfilling an expectation Dave knew deep down would not be possible. 

Dave was prepared to live out his life alone. He had been alone his entire life and when he wasn’t, he was with his dad and that was terrifying and painful. Enough that Dave understood that he never wanted to bring anyone in too close to the danger. A martyr complex that led him to sabotage multiple relationships, romantic or otherwise. 

Karkat leans on the bed to place a clumsy kiss on Dave’s temple. 

“I’m going to get some coffee started.”

The gentleness of Karkat’s lips in his skin makes guilt stir in the pit of his stomach. 

It’s different though, this isn’t the old guilt and shame of prescribed disappointment to his dad--

It is the guilt and terror that he may be leading Karkat into something dangerous. 

Dave slowly gets up after a moment and climbs out of bed to make his way to the bathroom. 

He pushes himself through the motions of brushing his teeth with a toothbrush that now lives in the cup next to Karkat’s and catches his reflection in the mirror, wearing the old gray studio hoodie that is now more Dave’s than Karkat’s. 

Everything about the image feels  _ right. _

Dave takes a deep breath before stepping out to meet Karkat in the kitchen. He stops by the discarded pile of jackets near the front door and picks up his shades. 

His cheeks flare up with pink at the memory of what happened there the evening before. 

Dave steps into the kitchen and sees Karkat staring at his phone with furrowed brows. 

When Karkat hears Dave step in, he shits the screen off and looks up with a crooked smile. 

“Coffee ready to go?” Dave runs a hand through Karkat’s hair as he passes and relishes at the soft purr that he lets out. 

“Just about, I made toast,” he sighs. 

Dave nods and takes out two mugs from the familiar cupboard. 

A wave of nervousness catches Dave by surprise. His throat starts to close up and his mind begins to spin. 

At the presence of sweet domesticity and the risk of losing it all, makes his body shiver with the understanding that this is the moment he’s been waiting for. 

“Karkat, can we talk for a sec?”

Karkat swallows the bite of dry toast and gives him a stiff nod. 

“Yeah,”

The coffee maker beeps and Dave silently pours coffee into two mugs before walking over to sit next to Karkat. 

Dave hands the mug with a cute crab to Karkat and keeps the Bi-Pride heart mug for himself. 

“What do you want to talk about?” Karkat’s voice is cautious as are his eyes. 

Dave pushes his glasses up his face to rest on his head so that Karkat can see all of him. If Dave is about to put everything out in the open, he might as well do it in the most vulnerable way he knows. 

He wraps his hands around the pride mug and his candy red eyes stare into the black coffee. 

“I’m not even sure where to start.”

Karkat chews on his lip, “Will you tell me about the scars?”

The question makes Dave looks up. His eyes are wide and the color drains out of his face. 

Few people have seen his scars. Every single one has asked about them and Dave has always made up an exaggerated lie to share. But he needs to be honest with Karkat about the dangers of being with Dave. 

“Most of them,” he breaths, “are from when I was a kid. My dad was a big fan of swords and a bigger fan of surprise attacks. I’m not sure why but strive had always been a big part of my childhood. Even into my teenage years. Sometimes I knew it was coming because I had fucked up something and other times he came out of nowhere. Whether he was there or not, and damn, sometimes I wouldn’t see him for weeks, I had to be ready. If I wasn’t ready, I knew I was going to end up another one,” one of Dave’s hands moves to rest where he knows the biggest scar crosses his chest. 

“And honestly, I didn’t really understand how fucked up it was until I was in high school. When I realized that not everyone was living the same life as me,” he huffs, “I remember asking Rose during a birthday call how she hid her scars during gym and she, fuck, Karkat, she sounded so horrified. And I think that’s when it finally clicked.”

Karkat reaches for Dave’s wrist and wraps a gentle hand around it. 

“But, god, I remember playing it off. I pretended it was a joke. Because at that moment, once I realized how it was all fucked, I was still worried about my dad,” Dave’s eyesight begins to blur wit the tears that are welling up. He shifts his hand so that Karkat can hold his hand. It’s clammy yet comforting. 

“I knew I had to get out. One way or another, I needed to get out. Rose helped me get my shit together in junior year of high school so that I could have a shot at colleges. She thought it was just me suddenly caring about my future, but I just needed an out,” a half-hearted chuckle escapes him. “That’s how I got the big one,”

Dave’s voice wavers, “This one is from telling him that I was leaving for a school out of state,” Dave grimaces at the memory.

He remembers feeling exhausted and for a briefest of moments considered that maybe he should just give in. 

“Dave, that’s awful,” Karkat searches for Dave’s eyes. His own full of concern and care-- it makes Dave’s heart feel lighter. 

“Well, I mean I’m stupid as fuck because I moved back in after graduation. I felt guilty for leaving and still like a piece of shit for going back.”

Karkat tightens his grip on Dave’s hand, “You’re not a piece of shit,”

Dave’s breath comes out shaky, “I figured that I was older, maybe a little smarter, and that I would be able to just avoid and anticipate his shit a little better. And I was! I think that’s when it fucking clicked for the old man. He suddenly was all about the Strider legacy and how that would pan out. Like a weird goddamn obsession with who I’d be and who would outlive both of us.”

“And fuck, he was obsessed with making sure I was straight. Maybe he knew? Maybe I give a vibe?

“You don’t give a gay vibe.”

  
“I grew up steeped in his homophobia and I’m afraid Karkat. I’m so fucking afraid,” his voice is barely above a whisper. 

“Nothing good has ever come out of my life, man. And I want to be with you. I want to be with you so bad and I’m afraid of the repercussions because I am a fucking coward, always have been.”

Karkat leans over and rests a hand on his Dave’s knee, “Dave, none of what happened to you is your fault. You’re not a coward. With all the shit he put you through it makes sense that you’d be afraid. But I’m not going to let him hurt you, ever again.”

The tears spill out of Dave’s eyes and run down his cheeks. They’re heavy with the pent up fear and anger he’s been holding back in years. 

“He beat the shit out of me when Rose came out. And I was happy to take that if it meant it wasn’t going to be directed at her, but what is he going to do when he finds out about me? Or you? Fuck! If something happens to you because of me--”

Karkat brings his hands up to hold Dave’s face between them, forcing Dave to make eye contact. His expression is serious and determined as he tries to communicate with Dave nonverbally. 

He wants to tell Dave that he never has to see his father again. That he should cut him out of his life and never go back to his life again. 

But he can’t do that. Karkat knows that. At least not right now while Dave’s wounds are wide open and raw. 

“I will never let anyone lay a hand on you. I swear. Dave, do you know how many people fucking love you? How many of us would do everything,  _ anything _ to protect you? We want you safe and happy,” Karkat feels his own tears streaming down his face. His chest is bursting with anger and a desire to shield Dave. To protect him in his arms and destroy anything that might threaten him harm. To kiss every scar on Dave’s body until the memory of the pain disappears. 

Dave chokes out a sob. 

“I’m also afraid I won’t be able to,” he gasps, “to love you right. Because what if I’m too fucked up? So fucking broken that I don’t know how to love you the way you deserve? What if I mess you--”

Karkat hushes him with a kiss on the lips.

“No,” he kisses him again, “You won’t,” his kiss lingers.

“Figuring out how we do this together is something that is on both of us to do. It’s always going to be a process, no matter what. That’s what relationships are,” Karkat leans back and wipes Dave’s tears away with his thumb. “Thank you for sharing this with me. For sharing your fears.”

Dave lets out another gargled sob followed by another.

“But I need you to know that it doesn’t change how I feel about you. I know I want to be with you. You make me ridiculously happy. I’m terrified at the thought of our damn work displacement separating us because I don’t want to pressure you into anything, but I so selfishly want to be with you.”

Karkat looks away at his own admission.

“Me too,” Dave cries, “I want that too,” he fully sobbing now. He can’t remember the time he cred so hard his body shook. 

Karkat gets out of his seat and moves closer. He leans downs and pulls Dave into a tight embrace. 

Karkat rubs a soothing hand down Dave’s back. Dave melts into him, crying tears of relief, sadness, and hope into Karkat’s chest. He can hear the faint hiccups of Karkat’s crying over his own loud sobs. 

They stay like that until their coffee gets cold.

**\---**

Rose can’t hold back her laughter when she walks out to the living room to greet Dave and Karkat. 

They look like a mess. Their hair is sticking up all over and Dave is wearing a tattered old sweater that Rose recognizes from a time before Dave ever arrived at the station. 

She stops when she notices the pink puffiness around Karkat’s eyes. 

“Are you okay?”

“The best,” Dave replies and reaches for Karkat’s hand. 

Karkat laces their fingers together and nods. 

“Okay,” Rose smiles, “Breakfast is ready.”

Karkat groans, “Thank god, I’m so fucking hungry.”

“Yeah, I bet you are,” Rose snickers.

“Rose!”

“Lalonde! What the fuck?”

She waves them into the kitchen where Kanaya is happily poaching some eggs.

“Good morning,” She greets them.

“Need any help?” Dave asks.

“Are you any better than Rose?”

“Oh, definitely worse.”

“Then no thank you.”

Kanaya finishes plating and starts setting plates on the table. 

Karkat sits at the table next to Rose and takes the plate Kanaya hands him. It’s beautiful and delicate and Karakat almost feels bad about how ferociously he plans to devour it. 

Dave takes his plate and settles next to Karkat, letting his leg extend a little so that both of their legs are lightly pressed against each other. It feels embarrassingly forward but Dave calms when Karakt drops a reassuring hand on his knee. 

Rose begins explaining the food and preparation to Karkat as if she had cooked it, while Kanaya sits between her fiance and Dave.

“How was your evening?” She doesn’t whisper.

Dave’s cheeks turn pink and he averts his gaze when he holds up three fingers. Kanaya chuckles quietly at the response and for a moment Dave thinks she might even sound proud.

“Oh my fucking sweet Jesus, Rose! I’m just going to eat it!” Karkat cries and starts stabbing potatoes with his fork.

Rose huffs, “Appreciate Kanaya’s cooking!”

“I do!”

Rose and Kanaya guide them through light conversation, strategically avoiding teasing comments while Dave and Karkat have food in their mouths.

“So,” Rose starts, “We wanted to share some news with you.”

Dave looks between Rose and Kanaya.

“Are you pregnant?” the food in Karkat’s mouth muffles his shocked tone. 

Rose rolls her eyes, “No,”

“But we have decided on a wedding date,”

Their faces are glowing with glee as they reach hold each other’s hands over the table. 

“That’s amazing!”

“Congratulations!”

“And it is much sooner than we were expecting,” the two women exchange a meaningful look.

Karkat sips his coffee and hooks his leg around Dave’s beneath the table. 

“When’s the big day?” Dave asks to keep the fluttering in his stomach at bay. 

“ The weekend before the station closes down.”

Karkat chokes on the hot coffee.

“That’s less than a month away,” Dave points out and pats Karkat’s back.

Rose and Kanaya nod. 

“But it might be the last time for a while that we will all be together. And we want the whole crew to be there,” Rose doesn’t miss the way that both men shift uncomfortably at the reminder. 

“Plus, short notice means it’s less likely the people we  _ don’t  _ want to invite will crash the wedding,” she adds.

“Fuck! Okay, we need some paper and a pencil. We gotta make a fucking list for this shit. Have you thought about a venue? Catering? A theme?”

Dave watches Karkat pat himself down looking for something to write on. 

“Something small, maybe the pumpkin patch? Most of the pumpkins will be gone,” Kanaya tilts her head in thought.

“But I bet we could borrow their Halloween set up!” Rose says as she walks over to a kitchen drawer and finds a notepad and pen. 

Dave sits back, sipping his coffee and watching Karkat throw himself into the planning. 

Karkat’s eyes are still puffy from crying with Dave only a few hours ago and Dave can only imagine the looks worse beneath his glasses. 

Dave gets up and starts collecting the empty and dirty plates in an attempt to distract himself enough that he doesn’t feel the trembling in his chest. 

Rose gives her brother a concerned glance and gets up to help. She nudges him towards the sink when he smiles at her in the most genuine way she’s seen since they were children, she sighs with relief. 

Karkat interrogates and scolds his friends for their lack of forethought in planning their wedding. But he suspects that they would be perfectly content with a simple courthouse wedding of it meant that all of their friends would be in attendance. 

  
  


“Okay!” Karkat slams his hands on the cleared table. 

Dave lets out an affectionate huff and hands Rose a clean plate to dry.

“Ceremony at the damned pumpkin patch,”

“Great.”

“Catering--”

“The usual Thai place.”

“Right, And the reception also at the pumpkin patch?” Karkat grumbles unsure. 

“It’ll be cute!” Rose pouts out of sight. 

“Cold and dark too,” Dave teases.

“We could probably get into the activity barn. Sollux actually knows the owners pretty well,” Karkat chews on the pen cap before scribbling on the notepad. 

“And the guest list is nearly set.”

“So what’s left?” Dave hands the last plate to Rose.

“Dresses?” Karkat offers

“And our best men,” Rose makes her way over to Kanaya. 

“What?” Dave and Karkat ask in unison. 

“Well, we need witnesses, and honestly who else would be my best man? It has to be my brother!” Rose beams.

“You have no excuse,” Karkat says flatly toward Kanaya. 

She rolls her eyes, “Karkat, it may not be by blood but you are indeed my brother. You are my best friend and I am keeper of all of your embarrasing secrets.”

Karkat scowls, “Shh!”

“Hey, what? I want to hear those,” Dave pitches in and leans into Karkat’s space until Karkat playfully pushes him away.

“If you really do not want to be my best man, I will do my best to be understanding. This is not meant to be a punishment.”

Karkat scoffs, “You know I will be. And it would be an honor or whatever,” his face is angry but his words reach Kanaya with kindness and affection. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah! Okay!! Chapter 10 is done! But I will be finishing it up in chapter 11! 
> 
> Thank you to the folks who have been reading! 
> 
> It's supposed to rain today so hopefully, the air will fall to a reasonable index and maybe the air will be breathable!


	11. One month

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A short epilogue!

Karkat’s alarm goes off at five am. He buries his face into the crook of Dave’s neck and places a soft kiss on the exposed skin before turning around and reaching for his phone and turning off the loud beeping. 

He’s been able to sleep a lot better since Dave started spending each night with him, keeping the bed warm throughout the night, but as the last week of production came to an end, Karkat was finding himself back in the familiar cycle of light sleep. 

The sun won’t rise for another two hours but Karkat knows he needs to get started. He lays under the covers, his back and shoulders a little sore from the hard ground, and stares up at the dark ceiling, his mind wandering to the long to-do list that is ahead of him,-- it is Dave’s sleepy wandering hand that pulls him back into the present.

Dave’s hand finds Karkat’s and gently tugs him back closer to him. He knows that Karkat won’t be going back to sleep but he has found that the brief moment that Karkat contemplates snuggling back in bed with Dave is one of the simplest joys he can get. 

He can’t help the smile that tugs at the corners of his lips as he eagerly awaits Karkat’s good morning kiss. When Dave takes the time to think about it, he finds himself pleasantly surprised at how quickly they’ve fallen into a routine that feels  _ natural _ .

Karkat sighs as he leans over and kisses Dave’s forehead and then the hand that is holding him before crawling out of the blankets. The cold air hits Dave’s body and he hisses, a habit he’s picked up from Karkat. 

“I’m going to shower, get some coffee going?” 

Dave groans, “Or..”

Karkat huffs, “No, not today. I need a quick shower today.”

Dave pouts and opens one eye to look up at his boyfriend. 

Karkat stretches and yawns. It’s strange to be standing in a now mostly empty room, save for a few heavy boxes and the pile of blankets they’ve kept so that they don’t sleep on the bare ground. 

Only a week ago, every room was bustling with energy as they helped plan and prepare for the Maryam-Lalonde wedding. And even after the wedding, there was no time to rest, Rose and Kanaya exchanged their honeymoon for the domesticity of packing their homes, eager and ready to start the new chapter of their lives in a new bustling city.

Kanaya, who had spent years cultivating relationships with powerful names in the fashion industry turned down multiple offers at high-end labels, and with the encouragement of her family, especially her wife, used those connections to launch her own clothing line. 

Rose, who has been polishing a series of novels since her college days has started sending out query letters to various publishers, and if Karkat’s reactions to the copy she let him read are any indication, publishers will be fighting to give her the best bid.

  
  


Once Kanaya and Rose shared their plans with the group, both Dave and Karkat knew it was time to have a real conversation with logistics and details about what their future was going to be. 

One thing was clear to both of them, wherever they were headed, they were headed together. 

“Karkat, dude, I can do youtube and the social meed thing to get started. And I know it might not be the most stable thing at first but I think I can become like, the best tuber and shit. I’ve got a niche and I think the trends are headed my way, I’ve been aimless for my entire life, this is probably the most intentional and solid I have ever felt.”

Dave places a kiss on each of Karkat’s cheeks, his hands resting on the softness of his exposed stomach.

“I’m not super stoked about the idea of you working with Eridan but if that’s what you want to do, I’ll support you. Got it?”

And while Karkat did not respond immediately, he did eventually take Eridan’s job offer, but not before setting boundaries and making his intentions clear. 

“This kind of works out, actually,” Sollux says during a meeting. “ _ Aradia Explores! _ Got picked up but PBS and one of their things are that we try to write in Dave’s guest character in as a regular guest and I was hoping we might actually be able to get Strider himself.”

And as the week moved both at the speed of light and molasses, everything seemed to start falling into place. John would be doing the weather at a station clear across the country but had also expressed doing some stand-up on the side and was already working with Dave for some bits on his channel. Jade, would actually continue working with Karkat as she ended up being the most talented contender out of all of the anchors who submitted audition tapes for the execs.

Things were going to be okay. 

Neither Dave nor Karkat, who are both used to pessimism, believed that what is to come will arrive without issues but each morning that they wake up together reminds them that it’s worth working through it all together. 

“Coffee then?”

Dave smiles with fondness and love for Karkat radiating out of his entire being.

“Yeah, I’ll make you the best damn coffee you’ve ever tasted.”

**FIN**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A quick short end! 
> 
> We don't get to see the wedding because I want that to be its own thing and I need to really develop how I want that to go. 
> 
> THANK YOU so much for reading! I really hope y'all enjoyed it.

**Author's Note:**

> Hello and thank you for reading! 
> 
> I've been watching a lot of 31 minutos on youtube lately which made me think about how fun a davekat AU could be so here we are! 
> 
> I have ten chapters outlined and my goal is to post an update 1-2 times a week!


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